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Golden Ratio May 2010
You don’t need a mop and bucket to clean up your life;
just dedication.
Golden Ratio May 2010
Waiting with Spanish guitars. 
Why do I sit here?
You stamp on me so,
and still I wait.
Am I a fool?
Perhaps.
It wasn't much to ask,
was it? 
For you to come to me?
Spanish guitars,
would have made it so romantic,
but it wasn't to be.
Fairwell my princess,
as I make my way,
to our Roman Bridge.
Golden Ratio May 2010
Roll up,
Roll up, 
Come and get your good news here.
My words are what you yearn. 
They will say what you want to hear.

I will gain your trust,
with tales of old,
some that you can't remember.
But don't dispair.
If I don't hit a nerve,
there are plenty more to nurture.

I will summon you a line,
of generic circumstance.
Sibling rivalry, 
never fails.
Empowerment to enhance. 

Was big bro the favourate? 
Were you always in his shadow?
Didn't daddy love you?
Do you need me to save you?

Wait...
I hear a voice.
He tells you not to fret.
He always loved you really,
even though it was never said.

And should you change,
your job?
your wife?
your life of discontent?

You will know,
just what to do,
when the time is meant.

Now off home you must wander,
With the gems you have collected,
and I too must depart,
to new venues heaven selected.

The same sermon I will preach,
to more gullible lost souls,
who fill my cash box even higher,
and underwrite my art of control.
Golden Ratio May 2010
My wife stood on the scales

The display showed 8 stone, 8 & 3/4lbs

I said, "You may as well call it 8 stone 9lbs"

She replied, "No! 8 stone 8lbs!"

We went shopping

There was a 30 inch flat screen tv on sale for £149.99

"Wow!" I said, "£149? That's cheap!"

"£150!" she barked

I can't win

— The End —