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Mente de caballos de carnaval, mente inparable siempre soñando de deseos inalcansables. Mundo de fantasia, mundo perfecto lo que siempre yo he pensado que es correcto. No hay preocupasiones porque no hay tiempo para ellas es una accion sin existencia. Para mi esto es mi ser muy despejado de la realidad pero vivo de el, reacciono differente tal vez muy creativo es complicado vivir en dos mundos y que uno sea elusivo. No prefiero el ireal aunque nadie me crea, siempre estoy en el espacio sin nave y sin esfuerzo. Pero esta mente no es un juego es dificil vivir en dos mundos cuando solo uno de ellos es importante. Pero en este carnaval no hay tal cosa como el descanso. Intento lo mejor pero mi mente me llama me atrae de diferentes maneras con las cosas que trama. Soluciones para problemas de una manera poca visible, y possibilidades de gran interes en mi vida constante. Yo lo decidi ase mucho en sacar tiempo para los dos sin el mundo elusivo no existiria "yo".
Far from my reach is the soft silk curtain that is your embrace made from fine silk its cold keeps me warm. Far away from me lies your ever changing peronality like a flock of birds I am incapable of keeping up with them. So far yet so close that has been your lips and mine together endless roller coasters that never fade from my mind. Miles away there is your brigth shine a smile that ive deard so heartfeltedly that it brings me pain to remember today. So many things that I adore from you all gone away from me, but the pain lays in the same place rigth next to me. Its all that I have left, all that I own from our past. The words that I hold of greater suffering " I just dont see you that way". But all in all what got to hurt me the most was the time you took to say those words. And all that ive written since then is all that I have loved because all that I have poured out of me and said to you was far from you're reach and my words stay with in me.
Poured water at the gutters of fallen men, the bloodfilld river of many severed heads they tell a story of war and tear sheds of a corrupted mind from the gallows of a grief display. But it was not people who were to be slain it was his own thoughts of the life he never gained. he dint wanted riches nor fame from the world he just wanted the comprehension of another pained soul. For twisted minds are silly rhymes of many thoughts in cheerful crimes. Normality is but a stain of a none proven existence the world is filled with diversity and it is all around the darkest places of our mind. We just never pay attention to it so it has been classified to be obscene, horrid, and inhuman. We have tried to speak otherwise but there is no right for the wicked as there is no wrong in the sane.
She makes everything sound like theres always a ligth of the end of the tunnel. and clears all the mist thats inside mi own with her smile she scares away my fears and fills miself with wonders that ive never imagine possible of being inside a human being. With words she fills mi head with dark thougths and leaves me frigthen and drowning inside of them but as I drown her voice makes me strong it has the power to make me figth for her every single day. She is in a complicated state one that makes the dark tougths grow and as much as i love her the more that it grows she has the power to crush and restore me but yet I will still be there and I will stand up infront of her i will take as many hits and as many falls as I can take to atleast let her know that she means the world to me.
arroused and lost in that maze. What keeps me from giving up its what is strange and something i can not explane it just drags me in for countless days. Searching and thinking of mi strange ways asking miself why dont i find a way out? , why do i stay? theres something withing this maze that just keeps me stunned its not the complexity its the way that its built a structure so well defined and beautyfull that just makes me set still and enjoy my time in the prison that is her mind.
These lovely walls so brigth and peacefull like winter snow oh what magnificent features. So soft as a pillow in my white suit I giggle. Morning and night I spend my time thinking within these walls of the time of when I was outside. Such beauty , such glory on everyones eyes. A tip toe here and a tip toe there giving them a smile from ear to ear and it doesn't end there. I share them my love they give me there blood what is that you say that this is not love? on the contrary my friend just look and see , in this generation what is there to be? If people **** each other for ignorant sympathys , Lustful envyies and ungratefull indecencies . why cant i be me? its not a sickness its another way to see how tragedy can be embraced by insanity and how wonderfull a diferent point of view can make a man be judge by lack of humanity. Im not crazy.....i just see the world in diferent points of view....what about you?
Strings of lightning bolts that are our veins charge us up to let us know we live til this day. The sound of thunder heart beats fast when you and I cross paths. The sound of you're voice comes first as the strike of you're pressence follows. Its been a few weeks now and I have been getting these davastating dreams, dreams where I get to see you but I just walk past you and avoid you. I avoid you in these dreams even when i can control them only because  it hurts to look at you're smile. Each time I get these dreams you're look pains me and sometimes I wake up teary eyed. Maybe its you're absence or maybe its just my love towards you. The things that go through my mind each day I think about you, such a strong sense of comfort you're  presence simply overwhelmed me. When i am with you I just feel blissful. You're sense of humor, strange attitude and personality is what i find perfect in you. So yes I would get jealous if you would kiss someone else. I get jealous on the things that I adore in my life yet, cant ever have them for some strange reason and this is my every day life.
If I could only drag you inside my mind to show you what my thougths have done, if you would only see how the seed that you planted in me grew day after day. All the storms it endured and all that it still has to go through. I have never felt so lost as I am now, I would love to keep trying but I see no interest in your eyes neither in your actions. Yet I have to live with this non-stop thinking, scenarios, memories. Normally I would go on but now I rather just hope you have a great life. This is probably my last goodbye to the emotions I have felt for you. If anything else it would be this. The common "prhase you are un-discribeable" this prhase to me is a lie. I can describe you to my hearts content in simple words. Days that ligth my day storms that keepd me lockd at nigth, winters cold that is my fears and hells fire that is my passion torwards you. How would i describe all that i love about you?  I would say... you're name.
Oh its me the interior being aint I wonderful a great! personality see?! No rose or petal can match my grace, yes they have thorns but I have blades, not the material kind I speak of my eyes come close take a look isn't it a stunning! surprise?  A gift for mankind but only for me, the descendant of pride. Come and see the one man show extravaganza! with my beauty it will surely "blow you're pants off" if to be compared by models I am the host of the show all the spotlight for me and the attention of the world, the earth might be the biggest thing in the universe but hey guess what?! I am standing on it and as the sun is my throne the moonlights my grace I stand upon all, let them gaze upon my glory for its the only thing good in life me and just me oh how I dream in a world of mirrors, meant only for me.
Where to start, the end? The only thing left is what i began,
In the hopes  of roses falling down your dress. Let me sleep in dark let me  fade away i can barely look at myself anyway. At this point its been given up and i cant stand the thought that i dint  get to hold you in my arms. The ravens crawl into my eyes, black water filled inside my emotions are a plague and my body's scard to death. And this unbearable pain its whats left to stay. I guess we were really not meant to be at all. I guess that i failed to be the man you loved once and for all.
Happiness the greatest cure but the deadliest poison.
Happiness the wonderful emotion of the enjoyment of life.  A state in which you go blind of you're surroundings and can only help but to smile and laugh. But what if the happiness that you are experiencing is whats killing you inside you are too blinded to know that you are slowly getting damaged and if you are aware of it you will be in a state of denial. You will only want happiness and will only think of it. Happiness the deadliest poison, how much can you're body hold, how many lies can you withstand telling yourself... how much time will I have to wait to have that poison inside of me aggain.
Hidden in tranquility it plessures my mind. Peacefull and obscure just the echoes of my thougths. No sound no interuption just the spark of the dark , it fills my heart with wondering plots. What to do, what to say on the upcoming day but this little spark distracts me so in plain white my mind stays no thougths no plans just me and the serenity and gaze of the spark. I dont ask for ligth for this is the only need, some peace and quiet shadowed and unseen. The ligth is too brigth and it hurts my eyes not to mention the noisy people at dayligth witch if I havent mentioned I despise. Morning birds are the devils crys I prefer the owls the nigths spys, all I need is the sparks dark shine to make this moment torn twine with I. Just meditation it and I no ligth just this exeption of this spark and its ligth shine.
When she tries to be evil she fails completely in my eyes. She ends up looking cute as a devil in disguise. Her random burst of energy uncontrollable and hard to keep up with. She always tries to hard to be seen psychopathic, but when meet her she is just a teddy bear bear with a temper. As mad as she can get she makes this peculiar face, much like a 3 year old when you scold and take its toys away. She claims that no one could stand being with her and when i hear those words i get frustrated. because i would love to try and be something with her. But i am just to shy to even tell her this. How could anyone not stand her? Her personality makes everything so vivid. Her own motivation to get the daily work done, and her random screams and babbles to make sure no one is bored. She simply fascinates me and leaves me speechless. I want to know more of her, but i am afraid because she might not want to know more about me. Sometimes i feel like i am just too much of a boring person for someone who is so energetic. Maybe that is just how the balance of life goes. The calm look to feel alive again.
In my memories its all a breeze, In this reality its far more then my eyes can see. Every single day the illusions come to a close, that if came true i wouldn't really know what to do. All of this i leave in your hands you have my trust not a single doubt will spread, just know that there is something that i have never had. And that is the privilege to be the web inside your thoughts, Strong residues that never end to get your attention. I wont fall down but i wont lie fear does linger inside of me each day. The fear that i fail to be good enough to be a part of your day, and to be apart of your name.

— The End —