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ghostlings Aug 2013
i feel like the folded sheet of paper left in the pocket of your jeans-
you never bothered checking for me before throwing them in the wash, or in the dryer.
one day you'll put those jeans on again and reach into that pocket and i'll be waiting ever so patiently, but all my secrets will be smeared and illegible.
you'll feel a twinge of guilt and think that maybe what i had to say was important
ghostlings Aug 2013
she is his sun, brightening his days, giving him warmth. he doesn't remember a time when he was without her, and doubts he could make it anyway.

she is his world, his universe, he revolves around her. she's been there from the start and he's depended on her ever since.

they both have come a long way, each constantly going through their own changes and metamorphoses. soon they won't recognize each other at all.

his sun is losing her grip on him. all this time she has held him in place, she has kept him in orbit. but what about her? she is slowly but surely burning out and neither of them notice.

they are drifting and his sun is burning out. she is losing herself and he is losing her and they are losing a battle that no one could win. his sun is draining him and her and he can't help.

his sun is expanding, emotions are running rampant. she is not as she used to be, she has consumed him and left nothing but fragments of broken pieces in her wake. his sun has ruined him and is ruining her, too. she explodes. she is nothing more than a white dwarf of a girl, emitting what little light she has left before it disappears forever.

it is cold and dark. his sun is but a fragment of her former self and there is no way of getting her back.
ghostlings Jul 2013
lately, I've been trying to notice the little things in life-
like the purple of the sky right before the sun rises
or the reflection of the lights on wet pavement.

I try to capture it all with my camera phone so I can show it to others.
some days it comes out beautiful-
like the sunlight shining through the tree's leaves, creating little shadows across my skin-
but most days it barely shows the true beauty of the scene.

whenever an amazing thing happens when I'm with others-
like the flock of birds above our heads are shaped in a heart-
l try to explain to them how beautiful it is
but they just chuckle and brush me off; I guess they don't see it.

so what I've come to realize is that these little things in life-
like the sunflowers growing through the cracks on the side of the highway-
are put on earth for everyone to enjoy,
but not everyone is able to see them.
ghostlings Aug 2013
we had a love like a sunset in winter–
in the beginning, our time was spent waiting for it to happen,
anticipating how marvelous it would be.
most days were cloudy and nothing could be seen,
but when it did happen, it was a beautiful sight, unfortunately lasting for only a short while.
in the end, most of our time was spent wishing it were longer, maybe forever even
ghostlings Jul 2013
I'm sitting at home watching TV mindlessly, but something isn't right
the walls- it's as if they are closing in on me.
my breathing begins to quicken
"I need to get out of here."

waking out the door i think,
"maybe some fresh air might help? there are no walls out here"
but it doesn't; it only gets worse
my chest tightens- i need to get home fast

back in the confines of my home, i run to my room
my head is pounding, i can barely breathe properly
why is this happening?
the walls are closing in again
everything feel tight, like I'm trapped in my own skin-
my body itches and burns
and my lungs can't take in enough air
and someone is screaming inside my mind except there is no sound

i want it all to stop

but my SKIN, oh god my skin
I'm writhing and scratching but the itch won't stop
if this keeps on I'm going to go insane
it's like I'm covered in grime- like i need to shed this layer of skin

i can barely think straight
everything is too loud and silent and tight and
i need to wash this feeling off of me

i run to the bathroom and turn on the water
but the sound of my mind or lack thereof is louder than the sound of the water and i need something to drown it out-
my stereo.
i run back to my room to get it and my phone
and plug the two up
i strip off my clothes, scratching at my arms and legs and step into the shower

****!

i stand there for a minute- the water burns my skin but it still itches
so i begin to scrub my body- every inch
the music is blaring and i can barely hear my mind anymore
the stream is thick and my lungs begin to relax
but my skin
my skin won't stop itching and burning
like thousands of microscopic things are crawling on me
no matter how hard i scrub
it
won't
stop

i scream as i turn the water even higher-
the music is deafening at this point-
I'm frantically scrubbing my arms, chest, legs, back, neck, everywhere
like I'm scrubbing away old heartaches and embarrassments and stresses and worries
scrubbing away e v e r y t h i n g
i don't stop until my limbs are bright red, my fingers burning from gripping the wash cloth so tight
I'm shaking
the water has cooled down some, and i let it run over my body, facing the shower head and slowly turning around

after what seems like hours the water is freezing
and the music has stopped long ago;
my mind is silent
my breathing is normal
and i can bare living in my own skin again.
i turn off the water and step out the shower, wrapping myself in a towel
I'm clean, maybe not spotless, but clean, for now
ghostlings Jul 2013
i awoke to the sound of my steady breathing
the house is silent
and everything is at peace during this moment.
there is no "i have to do this" or "i have to get that"
it is just this moment
where time seems to have stood still
and the only sound
is that of my steady breathing
reminding me to slow down every once in a while

— The End —