You were supposed to be there, to guide me, and tell me what to do.
To yell at me for wearing your clothes and to get out of your room...
To teach me how to talk to boys, and do my hair. To take me shopping for  clothes that we both could share.
To cry at my wedding, because the little girl you always knew is all grown up, just like you.
But, now you see the stars up close and the world from a bird's point of view.
But, you know what I missed the most? Was never getting to...look up to you

My love of thinking has led to the analysis of everything.
   Every single word anyone has ever spoken to me, I think of at least twenty-five things they could mean by saying each of their words. I think of all the ways they could have said it and what each of those would've meant and if it would have been better or worse for them to say it each different way.
   I do this to my own words too. I try to get into people's minds and figure out if what I'm saying means anything to them.
   I ruin myself by searching for hours for answers to unanswerable,  impossible questions.
   I watch the way people walk and figure out what type of personality people have and their backstory,  and what they like and don't like by the pattern of their steps.
   I watch the way people smile and decide whether it's genuine or fake by the amount of wrinkles it creates around their eyes.
    I listen to people's laughs...and study them. I count the amount of breathes they take in between each laugh and create a pattern with every noise they make.
   I watch the way people eat because it shows how they grew up; what kind of people they were raised by.
   I watch how people make decisions to find out whether they are a leader or a follower.
   I figure out what people do when they lie. I figure out what people do when they are angry and what they do when they are heart-broken. I look in people's eyes when I talk to them to test their confidence by whether they look away or not. I can't stop. I can't stop thinking. I can't stop analyzing every. little. thing.