Some days, most days
i could do without my head
cut it off before i drown
suffocation is a slow way to go
living in the vast oceans of what has pass'd
         wars fought, battles lost
         the history that once was
written out, Morse code in my mind
    thunderous sounds of sinking ships
dots & dashes deafening, it never ceases to exist
.... . .-.. .--. help, sinking fast
   i'll show you the frost that killed the posies
  it remains intact like the iceberg that sank the titanic
    it drips enough to drown the opposing stroke'rs
      spaces between the echoes of a soul saved
        breathless, pleading for air before the third time
          waiting patiently for my three dots & a dash...

1...2...3...4
'Cinderella, dressed in yella,
went upstairs to kiss her fella
By mistake she kissed a snake,
How many doctors did it take?'

*1...2...3...4...
skipping rope with girlish delight
realizations of real life burdens out of tune
how many snakes does it really take
to chuff that wonderment of childhood

double dutch that innocence right out of her
does it burn yet, round and round and up and down
she stares out the window with her eyes closed
dreams of Cinderella and Prince Charming's cloudy
he went downstairs to kiss her spoon
that jumped over the moon, jack fell down
and broke her crown if only she were Alice,
what could she do?
tell the Mad Hatter to make him act
like a 'real daddy',
bounce her on his knee,instead of
this thing he calls 'special kind of love'
as he rolled her over,
she prayed to god above

There was silence that echoed in her chaste ears
except when he said you better do this right
she obliged cause she knew if she did not obey
there'd be even more evil coming to play

All the King's horses and all the king's men
couldn't put her back together again 1....2....3....4......

Cinderella,
dressed in yella
went downstairs to meet a fella
on the way her knickers busted
how many people were disgusted?

1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8...

She's like butterflies in the snow
ethereal beauty hidden in flurries
she peeks out at the view
always too meek to flutter
in her soul she's a wanton woman
alas, someone took her purity
a blizzard that never passed
she keeps safely under wraps
hoping one day...just hoping

...and there you submerged yourself
       a warm bubble'd spot in my heart
against all storm warnings and precautions,
you fancied a challenge or crazy I suppose
this chambered heart is made of titanium
shot down, where once emotion pump'd
running rivers rage of icy futile frigid waters

I'll be the first to admit, still waters run deep
and this placid exterior hides a passionate undertow
although once the levy was broken,
            it took all warmblooded survivors

yet, still you linger without a preserver in sight...

perhaps, there's more to this element,

       the nature of drowning's decent

                     gingerly takes another breath

In dark amber twilight recesses
     folded over and safely tuck'd
memories mull like sweet dandelion's tangy wine
          of burgundy'd evenings bliss
    spice of nectar'd afternoons
            morning's satiated stares
I beckon these recollections
    on tempestuous rainy days raging such as this,
        reminiscing when we danc'd 'tween raindrops

My ink bleeds unto the page
        wandering from the mind's vortex
  spiral twisters, compulsions
                      and desires  
  wafting through rambling quills
     hearts devour'd & core exposed
        unstrung melodies of spirit's zest,
         flutters of gossamer wings on zephyr's glide
            touching moments unravel'd,
                  nature running poppy wild

               ...and then once again,

  ~EXHALE POETRY~

start
    the
          process
                over
                      again

  from the top one more time
    gliding on a dance floor
           of rhythmic seduction
             is it rhyme or reason
                 that keeps me coming back to you

........and then you touched me
not in the usual fashion,
but deep within my soul's fancy
a fondling embrace that took flight
clutch'd and pique'd every relevant moment thereafter
life would forever be changed         yet
most everything stayed the same
except for deep within the recesses of time
breath stood still and the imprint within my heart,
lasting well beyond a lifetime of  endlessness
still just a mere drop of water in an infinite sea
oftentimes, especially when it rains blissfully
i think of how you enveloped me for perpetuity

Apprehension, tucked in heart's intuition
    love grows old and insignificant
      once upon a time there
          was felicitous anticipation

This plight haunts my memory's spirit
   captured within guilt's sunlight
    windows upon my soul,
         now darkly tinged contemplation

Pensive thoughts rain hit or miss through
                   a frosted window pain
         sad cricket sounds remind me of an old rhythm
              when  poetry still rhymed ~

Winds blow by, arresting breath
    as growing older fades star's night
      wise man once told me, believe in
           the angels of your own fateful heart

We used to dance in well versed harmony
         bluebirds never sang of stormy endings
              and there was no such thing
                       as 'once upon a' in time

Where is love laid to rest
when it takes that last breath

are there markers at a grave-site
or does it purely burn out
much like ashes of cremation
no bejeweled urn to possess

terminated last rites,

sacrificed primordial
spiritual strength for recovery

~Rest in Peace~

if you've faith enough
  to say 'AMEN'

i've lived through a life of stolen kisses
baby blankets, hits and misses
cried a million tears in retrospect
soup du jour and soup for one
apple peels and bruised egos
all encompassing lust and love
& tiny tots bouncing on my knee
lived within passion, pity and grace
fall out from past grievances and haste
endured & defied vast undefined confines
treading in my own footprints,
yet, the world goes round & round
no matter where i've been or what i've seen
shut the door on one chapter and another begins
pretty posies and hurricane's wrath
ups and downs of this insane merry-go-round
yet in the corner of my eye always exist
a glimmer of sanity that walks the dog
takes out the trash and sips regal tea
clouds illusions in my mind
changes in the valleys and high seas
lofty inspirations awakening the dead
'work it or leave it alone'
over the rainbow in my head
spinning to the tune of the beat goes on
high on life, then giddy to a frown
i've made myself dizzy no doubt
at the end of the day
when the world is at bay
i wonder still, would i want it any other way

" COLLABORATION Jack & Frieda "

A hush does wake this early dawn
in whispers formed on breathless dreams
Sunrise of horizon’s glow
through flowing curtains on opaque glass

I sense in the distance, a tingling  
the air crisp with Fall's spinning
a tangible scent of warmth is mulling
like hot cider's comfort beside a fire

Crimson and ochre paint the valley
in a tapestry of nature’s desire,
gently woven in patterns of bliss,
collecting thoughts in blue tinted jars    

Memories of far away encounters
as if captive in snow globes embraces
Topsy-turvy recollections and reminisces
painted in hues of yesterday's resolve

Secured neatly with plaid and gingham ribbon,
set upon the sill amidst cranberry ornaments
Reflecting past love and new day wishes,
scented by a heart longing for autumn’s sweet kiss

*A gentle sway of a zephyr sweeps my hair
I'm reminded of your touch at the nape of my neck
a season of whirling calyx in sweet surrender
I sigh in this moment, for I wish you were still here

Deep in the soul,
  where butterflies harbor grief
straight from the heart hence poppies cry
   lies the spirit of all those loved.    lost
broken wings of decayed flowers
   ashes to dust within the mind's spirit

Tears flow through the abysmal depths
    drowning amidst sorrow of yesterdays
where the grass remained splendor
   and the uncaged birds still sang
reminiscing  clear waters of recollection
    in the equinox of dark moons
stirs the discontent of seasons change
     after the ice of winter thaws
         there will always be warmth

In this whirling disarray of thoughts
   wind sweeps the dying leaves away
when autumn's tears are lifted
    from their murky depths, reborn    
to play amongst the new day's sigh
   we never forget the fluttering of loss
we grant their wings to vibrancy yet again
   deep from within a sacred place,
          where reverie's paradise rekindles
              and butterflies never die...

As does the phoenix exalt from the embers,
agony scorches the ashen'd memories
far above it all lies deliberation's beauty
disciple'd of a higher power's calm
guardian of my life's golden moments
swept up in the tides of angel's echoes
tears stain crimson's forgiven skin
aching days linger eternally remiss,
eye's vague flashes could not comprise fatality
gracious generosity of mocking clouds fill
soaring above a blustering tempest's nest
rancid squalls uprooted a tumultuous upheaval
candlelight's flickering flame keeps me unearthed,
breathless, waiting on beauty from pain...

   ...people ask me why I am so cynical,
why can't you take the chance and trust,
the answer is simply 'because of you'
reflective views flip my psyche into another dimension
you ask why, I keep my distance never to connect on a deeper level
I laugh and smile, I learned that from you, a keen cover to hide the truth
'because of you' my mind is twisted, my body  recoils
listless in the heavy load, a burden that was not my doing
so, when people ask 'why so wary', I say something flippant
to cover my painful angst laden reasons why, but we both know...
it's 'because of you'.....................

You wrote in Braille upon my heart
  tattoo'd  black etchings darkly lit
echoes of what was once impressionist art
     vanquish'd with a glance of thy sword
words not decipherable in the name of love
  inscribed delectation's sans an endorse'd mark
vintage designs deleted of scroll'd scriptures expression
   signature'd confessions bestowed within crimson's pen  
hush'd in unsettling breathless interpretations,
     blindly I followed til you resonate'd in barely touch

prancing about on your
illustrious painted  words
  finely tuned elusive emotions
      that leap from the heart
my soul immersed in fine
   pomegranate wine's
     effervescence,    glissading  
        upon silken grassy gradients
             of yesteryear's intentions
  romancing the spirit's
       rhythm'd inclinations
     within this enchantment
         of poetic's movements tempo
inhaling vapor'd affinity of
   ecstasy's diaphanous illusions  
       bumble'd upon convictions
             confection'd sensibilities
   floating on celestial air's divine
             wafting impulses
    ecstatically dying a little death
          with each fine tuned melody
    dancing in the cadence of *****
             nectar'd blissful notes
                  of poesy's mesmerizing etchings
                              upon a soulful caress

Celestial splendor made of sugar'd specks,
like pin dots of eternity's sweet nectar
floating amongst the tangerine skies of obscurity
nestled 'tween reality and universe's hunger
quenching the thirst of all mankind's promises
dancing on fanciful moonbeams of nighttime's bliss
countless dust particles enhancing the mystery

When you wish upon a star,
do you ever wonder who they are?

Close your eyes
*picture butterflies
escaping from a meadow of wildflowers
feel a gentle zephyr hug your cheek
imagine it's someone dear,
let the mind flow of babies breath
and first love's fluttery kisses
speak to the moon in enchanted tongues
feel the power of the majestic seas,
sing with birds on a captivating morn'
watching the burnish'd sun enrapture the earth
the world is easily our oyster'd pearl
if we seek the joy within our hearts,
find the ecstasy in simple things

You unfold me to reveal my true colors
   reality sets the ashen tone on tone
shades of Gray unmanageable
    black purges from my soul
you try to color outside the lines
  my pink underbelly turns steel cobalt
no purple mountains majestic views
   sickly putrid green reeks the color of death
failed attempts cower in tinged yellow
   no vibrant color palette here to uncover
you can't expose my soul and expect brilliance
   you abruptly fold me back into abashed creases
still searching for the simple elegance
      of an unfurled radiant rainbow

Lanced hearts with sharpen'd derisive swords
praise in quest of soul with fortress'd intensity
humanity's depths of breaths & declination
flippant whirl around fury's surge
dance'd with indignity around posies
knelt before the gods in reverence
vivacious adoration of nature's beauty
languid solemnness dip'd in gravitas
bruised butterfly wings, birthing conception
satiated desires within abstract'd notions
language combined within torrents of gusto
floating on gale winds and simplex'd zephyrs
artful appreciation prais'd in kind
communion encompassing a state of being,
complexities of a poet's psyche*

~Amen

Consecrate me in your madness
    sanctify this communion,
sketch me in bursting metaphorical hues,
  color'd tinges blushed of cardinal's soft sonnets
paint a picture within inky filigreed lace,
  finely woven silken thread'd tapestries
my religion breathes your affinity
      harmony's rapport of favored essence
twist poetry into my hair,   whilst
   dancing upon the music in your stanza's hymn
bathe me in peachy champagne bubbled prose
  suffuse butterfly shivers up my spine
i breathe the air you've fervidly script'd
   etch'd in blood flow awakens my senses,
the emotions artistes' bleed out
   you are my strength, my power
          my weakness, my Achilles heel ~


swooning in the phases of your darkly lit moons
           cut me deep into the heart & gut
piercing movement of echoes unfold.  
        moving majestic amethyst  mountains,
shred my soul with your dragon's breath
     anoint my *******, oils that seep from thy quill
            make me punch drunk aberration's tipsy
        drenching me in sparkling scarlet wine
clinging from the vines of destiny's path
           my soul's existence is solely dependent
    upon your utterly blissful verses within Elysian Fields

Lust's sweet intentions
   caught up in fiery impulses
riding upon wild horses' dreams,
   relentless cravings of the soul

Unfurling in the touch of scorching heat
   desiring licentious will is never ending
satiated within intensity's finale
   luster'd in the feel of scarlet satin sheets

Breaking all the rules,
  devour'd in animalistic hunger
til breath blares an acoustic prayer
absorbing emotions through ****** intensity

tenderly your sword plung'd deep
   surrender to this wanton addiction
senses whirling in flame's yearnings
    fell under your fiery hypnotic spell

I'll gladly die a thousand little deaths
  to acquiesce with no restraint
within these all consuming confines
of this delectation's heavenly annihilation

...another year gone by
time for contemplative reflections
stand with grace     ease deliberately
away from grievances & heavy sighs
wondering when the past will adapt
another challenge of the heart & soul
new reserves of inner strength
fortified through friendly smiles
another step forward to new dimensions
wandering somewhere above the clouds of mind
must embrace elapsed time to live the present
weakened resolutions now seeking restitution
time on a silver platter graciously abounds
another day, another lesson, another year gone by
surrendering to this brilliant gift we call life

looking for my savior to undo me
under the rubble of victims remission
my chained heart nailed to a cross
lust'd sheets beneath the ***** streets
crucify myself lookin' for imprinted adoration
little earthquakes of my soul unload'd
save me from myself and these blood tears
my heart thunders like a roller coaster ride,
struggle to captivate your poetic prowess
never good enough to leave my impassioned stain
severe'd connections in feeble breath's wake
washed away in torrents within ocean's depth
castles crumble in the chaos of my mindless muse

Crippled teardrops ache
relief drips crimson pools
fragile heartfelt moments
buried deep within damage
misery rages in aged flames
afraid to breathe in fire,
scars affect hourglass time
dying in the anesthesia
cuts deep to the bone
annihilating freedom's tomb
killer instincts in sorted rush
bitter taste upon the soul
cold truths' pithless shivers
strangers bared in rhyme
blood cours'd through cursed veins
crushed 'tween hung tooth'd denial

Cut me, leach this tumor within me
it has festered into a separate entity
with its own blood supply
grown overbearing in  its voracity
taking up more space each day
edging me out of the picture entirely
seems as though it'll devour me whole
dismemberment appears imminent
I'm only afraid of what I'll find
a face similar to mine with two heads
a cancer of your caliber, eating me alive
cold, ruthless treachery of no denial
ancestral antecedent, I'd prefer it dead
set fire to your name in vain
demon feasting decades after
it will never surrender peaceably

My soul
has purged
a thousand lives

I have traveled,
many destinations

I found my peace
and contentment
within my heart
floating through air

no matter
how wide my longing
it drifts ardently

amidst this reverie's mystery,
holds tight onto a cloud

coming full circle
it always takes me back
to this sacred place
dancing on the midnight skies

who's reflection is this i see
staring back at me....
*forged in the flames of adversity
whispering ink leaking past blots
scarlet threads woven intricately
through portals of  complicity
machinations of another time and place
laced within roots of strangling tendrils
mutated pretty posies succumb to history
dancing round the fire of life's indignities

Fallen under a darkly cast spell
eerie spectral vibrations in my bones
music compos'd upon churchly organs
rushing shivers up my uncompromising spine,
demons playing charades on blacken'd keys
heart bleeds a dull beryl hue of expir'd crimson
mind whirling in gray'd remuneration tunes  
dance tracks takes fight without raven's hindsight
commission'd by devil's own apathetic self

fell to earth like the death of a mockingbird
claws still left in my heart's discontent
lost its shine before its untimely demise
musings come undone mid-flight
this plight never had a chance to fly
scatter wildflowers on my grave-site
will you kindly please,
here lies the soul of peaceful lyrics*  
    **sing song's
        harmonies
               disconnect
                     from
                         reality's
                              rhyme

dis connected,
obliterated into tiny pulverized pieces
you took flight without an omen
pierced my soul never to be the same
songs upon a prayer's wing'd escape  
once there were two with a single connection
secrets of the heart tuned for perpetuity
nothing lasts forever except memories

Madness rules the pen,
   freedom of speech
         not even a concept
what the muse says goes,
  just give in to the inky blows,
     dip that quill in ****** tears
  color it with apricot custard dawning's
    ravage erotica's blissful yearnings
       crack a rib on that funny bone
if you fight the urges,
   you'll end up on the chopping block
         writer's imagination arrested
don't ******* the muse,
         'tis a woefully dreaded plight indeed...

my pretentious voice doesn't match the noise in my head
verses etched as silken decoys unfurled by titanium recoil
hiding in the recesses of silent protocol's evasive gibberish
clamoring to speak the truth within history's chapters
my stealth commute from childhood to insanity
rewarded by awkward stares of disbelief and disgust
i've waded in the pool of denial's wavelengths
lost in aftermath's undertow of insolent impudency
i've tread water til i drowned an insignificant death
still breathing the vapors of past grievances
grousing under a tidal wave of crush'd soul's imperfections
breached in the indignity of transgression's metaphors
personifications of a role better left blinded by fear
than face the nakedness of turbulent truth

You speak to my soul and make my eyes smile
warm as sunny days, enchanting as moonbeams
your thoughtful words permeate my very being
I carry your friendship as a precious locket
always available to hold dear and admire
safekeeping next to my heartbeat's ardor
scripted designedly in golden stanzas
pendant's everlasting imprinted verse*

For my sweet friend, you know who you are. xo

She scribbles endlessly,
waiting for her true love to see
the aching in her wanton heart
pen'd in crimson's darkly hue'd soul
inky passages of the past
when the sun still shine'd a'glow
and all was write with the world

As the wind rushes over the moors
she thinks of her Heathcliff'd dreams
reverie of timely love season'd skies
when spring sprung eternally
old man winter was only a notion
frozen in another's memories
til stormy nights overcame the fantasy

Still, she revisits her place in the sun
bleeding out on paper without conscience
a wavering inner voice triumphs demurely
as emotions spill over the tethered wastelands
once a land of wide open lush filled pleasures
this place now only a reminder of tormented defeat
yet, her resolve for passion's affection remains

She scribbles endlessly, ferociously
waiting for her true love to glance
  the aching in her wanton heart
pen'd in crimson's darkly hued soul
   inky passages of the past
when the sun still shine'd a'glow
   and all was write with the world

As the wind rushes over the moors
  she thinks of her Heathcliff'd dreams
reverie of timely love season'd skies
   when spring sprung eternally
old man winter was only a notion
  frozen in another's memories
  til stormy nights overcame the fantasy

Still, she revisits her place in the sun
  bleeding out on paper without conscience
a wavering inner voice triumphs demurely
   as emotions spill over the tethered wastelands
once a land of wide open lush filled pleasures
  this place now only a reminder of tormented defeat
yet, her resolve for passion's affection remains

You tripped over my exhale
I plummeted into your anxiety
my tongue was twisted in your head
as I breathe in your vibe of misfit disparity
surrender deafen'd my equilibrium
in your attempt to polish our symmetry
checks & balances fell like insufficient collateral
wound up in a flaming well of a dried wicked asylum
inky promises that were deferred as charged
negotiations postponed without further adieu
locked and vault'd as another lunaticism lesson learned

Butterfly haunts me
flutters by in the dark of night
when the smoke cleared
all that was left was a still photograph
no breath to be had, no words to be spoken
perched upon my mind where no one can see
all the secrets that taunt me

Left behind in your spirit
like an erratic zephyr they twist my head
nothing sacred in how you fled the atmosphere
I oft wonder have you found that freedom
as you floated from this earth
markings on the sky of colorless clues  
the painted scenery still not clear
all that's left to do is exhale poetry

untimely teeming downpours,
     my tears slid down your cheeks
as your heart bled unto my soul
    without concessions revelation's pulse,
alas, beating eyes speak in disclosure
    proclamations etch'd in blood
envelop'd the yielding surface skin
    strapped to a behindhand'd watch
that read a confession of surrender
   at quarter past indignity and
half past sinful indulgences
   rollback was warranted
but time had earlier run out
   faith expired on the second hand
dance end'd when the music laps'd
     love died an untimely death

*...whilst the band play'd burning violins

Fed upon your metaphors
        like a zombie's lust for blood
howl'd at the moon in your
            verbose verbiage's alliteration
piece by piece, like Frankenstein's
              monster you conjur'd me whole
  ****** out the guts and laid me
         flat in ghostly passages twisted cravings
  dwelling 'tween light and darkness
         assimilated in your inky draft
   dancing amuck within your tangled webs
       just the other side of nightmare's exposure
drinking in the sea of your heaving tidal steamers
           punch drunk in phantasmal's obsession
high voltage flipped me over like an abstract
               Dali painting's w*e
  I come away ghastly satiated,
              macabre though it may seem
  thrills and spills in every tempting morsel
            of affecting poetry's sinful appetite

Do you even feel the glue
that holds the cracks together,
did you hear the broken pieces
is this layout put together so concrete,
the facade such a slip of the eye
scaffolding a mere set em'brace,
somedays I have to ponder
who is reflecting off these walls,
made your way to the top floor
never stepped foot in the basement
   it's just not happening,         as if
when the tangible starts to crumble,
   everyone makes it to the safe room
draft another blueprint of the heart,
   stuck together with spat out remnants
"I'm faking it 'til I'm pseudo making it"
   plays on a scratchy loop in my head
apparently you're not       only blind
this cinder'd block is going down
   there are no doors out of this shaft
    once you crash that cellar floor
you end up six feet below the ground*      

start over...

Beginning of the end or the other way around
one moment melds into another impertinent
moon that's now a pasty light in your eyes
taking prisoners that died a thousand deaths
heart bleeds blackest crimson tears
evidence of trust's blind vision pierced
words of contentment now tarnished
with the soulless questions of guilt
fairy tales sink down the rabbit hole
forever after lasts but a moment in time