I imagine outer space to feel like this.
like;
no matter what, I can't lie down.
seeing a star that close made
all else seem
so much less bright.
I'm unimpressed.
I just want to love again but, you left that spell on me.
my eyes don't see color anymore,
my arms aren't reaching.
you printed poems onto my bones.
my mouth won't let me say marvelous and my hands quit thinking.
I'll turn to dust like this darling.
I'll be a little sandstorm on your
shore for awhile and
dizzily dissolve into your
winsome crashing.

I'm doomed if I do
god dammed if I don't

cheers to the demons clinking my cup;
still ******* the one's who won't

don't plunge me

grown sick of the ocean

if mouths told the truth,
I would not live in this dungeon

okay, you plunged me, big deal

somehow you expect me to chew on those lips & somehow sit still ?

get real
you get real

cause I'm as real as it gets
I've got patience for days  
**but I am non-vacant for regret

Had I used half the wit I get from my mother, I wouldn't have crowned you with every ounce of my mouth or crawled, calling you the Queen in the kingdom under my covers

running marathons of

chasing something

something like the

breath you laid on my shirt

what cancer to this body
by how you treat my cells
is irrational

& why all of this sitting ?

I would run to you

but

I know what's twisting your doorknob

and it's already sent me away

take my chest
take my chest
and all of it's ache
away with my breaths
that you take everyday
take my tongue
take my mouth
cause I don't need to speak
these words, my mind
I eat & lose them
take my teeth
take my wants and take my needs
all they do is cause me grief
take my knees
you make them weak
would you please hold these things for me ?
now take my ribs
you take my ribs
& I do not want them back
you take my lungs
you take my heart
and all of her attacks
please take my head
you take my head
and hold it in your hands
tell it what you want
cause it does not understand
I give my organs
make you hold them
I gave you all of me
and if you don't agree
than please tonight, just take my eyes
and with them take these dreams
I cannot sleep
I'll never sleep
when you're all I can see

I'm crawling
I'm crawling
I'm calling you, woman
my holy intrusion
I'm confused but still moving
I've been known to breathe like lakes do
been known to freeze
did you think I was blind
do you think I can't see ?
clearly
we all have our beasts
but mine is scaled and rather frail
and yours was born with teeth
so roar for me
and I'll feed you my body
you cannot hunt for my blood
after you've chosen to swallow me;

see i'm no old woman
and you are no wolf
with your fairy-tale face
your storybook looks
and oh what big eyes you have
no better way to haunt me
than the pain stains on my hands
from me and all my wanting

I'm having beer for breakfast
& you're nowhere around
freed a completed checklist
of my spine spiraling down
I'm queen
I'll eat you legless
your knuckles form my crown
through your deep breathing down
your knees become my necklace
and I'm pushing through your sounds  
it's the bed that's shaking now
but you feel it in the ground
your sweat has met the sheets
and through your bones
I feel you now
between our breaths
we're chest to chest
I fumble through your brown
with every strand tied in my hand
and both your lips against my mouth

how dare I
compare you to the birds
the stars
the beach or even trees
& shame on me for blinking
when you are all I see

I've watched the sky
light up the night
and every time
I've seen your eyes
in Orion
I've seen them in Hydra
and the minors
I've dreamt you were mine girl
when you smile
I can see it for miles
but our stars haven't aligned
or maybe I'm just blinded by the
lightning
or the light
from the moon
I can see it from my room
& I can see you in that too
and I'm in love with the universe
I'm so in love with the way it works
between the blue & all the latitudes
the way the wind blows through
is how I mean to move in you
but I'm not a bird
and you're not amused
if only I could prove my fuse
on my spaceship
to meet your atmosphere
but I'll just lay here
alone under these stars
& maybe if I don't blink
I'll find your heart