The things I cannot forgive myself for,
They are dead trees,
They are angry ghosts

Wait,
Shouldn't I have used laundry detergent?
I should have,
Shouldn't I have loved her,
Shouldn't I?

I,
I drift between starlight,
To forget it all,
Trying to hide from pictures that reopen blinding wounds,
Like magmatic pillars,
Rising,
Spitting,
Gasping,
Combusting: I cannot hold them down with my hands,
They settle and vulcanize around my heart,
A thick thick crust now...
Even though they are seismic,
These spaces keep me safe,
Drifting,
Breathing,
Dark but not dark,
Dying but not dead,
Breathing,
Just Breathing

A cold room for puddles of blood,
Yes its true,
My conscience is slowly dripping down my fingertips,
Can you see me becoming the monsters that grow teeth over us?
Listen,
Just listen,
Wolf Queen,
You know I can't give my hands to you,
Matchstick man,
How long will I have to burn away my roots?
How long do we have to burn?
The self destructive gene...
Ashes-
I have no hands to catch the ashes
You know I loved the sound of rain more than the sound of my own pulsing blood,

Dreams spill over these days,
I told you,
When I release the spectrum in my chest,
It would absorb the colors of this world,
Hiding from my own face I,
I have become,

Nothing

I sleep with a ghost,
For it cannot be I that has flesh,
A specter for a dying town,
Memories trapped in dusty pictures,
Scattered everywhere here,
I stood still in this place and watched the movements of decay,
Decay into

Nothing

All my colors are bleeding out
All my colors are bleeding out
All my colors are bleeding out

Hot and sad on asphalt,
Knowing I never wanted to be here,
I clench my crunching knuckles,
Raise my fists up to the cold stars and scream-
**"WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?!"

Beds were never made to die on

I can't pretend to be happy,
I can't pretend to be successful,
I can't pretend to be confident,
I can't pretend to be strong,
What comes first?
If I just tell myself I am, do I become these?
Is that my chicken?
Am I it's egg?