there exist far too many systems of which I do not wish to be a part
systems inextricably entangled with every aspect of Being
they are unavoidable, no matter how far I step back
they lurk behind me, around me, in every direction
slowly reaching towards me, with spidery fingers
they circumvent my attempts at stasis, my seeking of peace
glancing against them reveals their depth and putrescence
their touches spark blinding, scalding light
light flaring in the minds eye, which cannot be shut by any means
well... except for one.

in a flash it got dark
hope y'all have been enjoying the view
'cross my balcony to yours
the darkness lets you see in
my flickering amber silhouette
jumping from hall to hall
my mute shouting (to you)
gesturing, pointing at walls
glass in hand
subtitles of ice clinking
condensation dripping
a sweating brow
my ******* obstinate, silent riposte
crash to the couch in defeat
oh yeah, the blinds, the blinds
and to you, your perspective - goodnight
what's left is mine, and mine alone

the spider on my balcony has five legs, not eight
I think to myself, what a pity, that its struggles are!
though I stop myself and ask; is having five legs worse than eight?
I've only two!
so how can I tell?

well! its web is different than those I've seen
less ordered, less dense
at times it flails before it pivots, to conjoin the lines
disorder! we know that to be a curse!
what a curse! what a curse! to affront the mold!

yet it persists, holding on, with its five legs, not eight
in the wind, in the rain, it deigns to ensnare those
whom, I suppose, lack its elegance - trickery, and guile
plodding on, eventually grasping the next thread
linking twine to twine
harmonizing strands
as I think of its life, and mine
and mine,
and mine,
and mine.

they say I should talk to you
even tho you're gone
that it helps
(me I guess)

what can I say? what's new with me?
nada, dear
I am a static object
sitting here & ruminating, without you
I've so much time...

so how is the other side?
I bet you take to it well
when it's my turn, you'll be there
to show me the ropes
and share sunny smiles

we'll take back our goodbyes
we were lucky enough, at least
to spend some of your fleeting time
on those, so for now, till tomorrow
goodbye.

these pretty things we tell ourselves
conjured from misshapen realities
abstracted, sifted, & distilled
till sweet as honey
drank in for vitality
their warmth sustaining
bearing halos over our eyes
like coins, awaiting collection
at the end of this absurd, rapturous quest
with its solitary end;
relief.

listen closely
...ssssszzzssssstt!
you miss this amongst the company of others
the smell of juniper
(almost like bark)
that beloved word
so close to Jupiter
her rings an engagement to us all
(for our world)
benevolence // protection
(or a curse?)
could've been stellar dust
instead paramecium
plus-plus
double-plus
plus-us
+++
instead here we are
drinking fizz & juniper
till we forfeit our favour
(insatiable fervour)
with the fates, and Jupiter
juniper, juniper
'tis such, 'tis such
for now, it's enough.

**** negative space
give me generosity
and bounty
a cornucopia
all to myself
if this is going to be worth it
we need to do it with some zest
and ******* zeal
in an age where we marginalize zealots
(not advocating for them)
H-Y-P-E-R-*******.i.n.g-partisan
no middle ground
(huge space in-between)
a void, voids, we know voids
THE N-E-G-A-T-I-V-E...
   S   P   A   C   E  
from voids within us
is room for harmony
sunflowers
you


me

and
harmonious
D     -     I     -     N