I'm sorry I keep hurting you.
I'm sorry I always get so mad.
I hope you know it's never your fault.
I never ment to push you away.
I always hoped you'd stay.
But when your gone and I won't know what to say.
In your absence I know I'll pay.
Lying alone in the dark, waiting for your return.
Too many sleepless nights ahead,
Wishing I had said I loved you a little more.
When you cone home I promise things will be different.

When we first met I thought it was just a fling.
I didn't think it would turn out to be the real thing.
Now nearly three years later,
Our love has grown so much greater.
We have been through tough times.
But I've made up my mind.
You waited for me more than once.
Now I'll wait for you in your absence.
While you join the army,
I'll keep my heart under lock and key.
I have faith our love with last,
Despite our pasts.

Sitting in a room full of my "peers",
I still feel alone.
At the family table with food and laughter,
I still feel alone.
In the bed where I lie with my love,
I still feel alone.
Roaming the mall and watching strangers,
I still feel alone.
No matter how many people are near me
I still feel alone.
I'm aching to fit in,
But I'll always feel alone.

He told me he loved me,
But hurt me so fast.
Foolishly I forgave him, thinking we'd last.
Everything was seemingly better for us.
Little did he know, I was hating life.
Desperate for attention I started playing with knives.
When the attention I craved came from a new man,
I dropped josh hard.
I became the worst kind of wild card.
And I'm not even sorry.

I'm broken and hurting.
I have been gone to get "help" too many times.
Nothing has made me "better".
Yet here you stay, by my side.
Why? Why are you still here?
I spend so much time hurting you and fighting you off.
And still you tell me you love me.
How can you not see that I'm not good for you?
I'm not stable enough, not right now.
Yet you still care for me.
I will get better. For you, for us.
I want to get better so we can live happily ever after.

I don't know where I'm going.
I don't know what I want.
Here I am, walking this path I'm on.
But what if it's the wrong path for me?
It's confusing, it's making me dizzy.
Questioning every move i make, wondering if it will make me happy.
Life is a maze and I'm pretty sure I'm lost.
Lost and waiting for a sign.

There's no reason to be afraid, right?
It's safe here, right?
You promised I wouldn't keep hurting like this.
You were suppose to protect me, remember?
So why am I still hurting like this?
Here I sit, still hurting and crying and drowning alone.
I know you tried to help.
But I am not safe.
And there are too many reasons to be afraid.
I have just adapted to this fear of life.
I'm still alive, aren't I?
I guess I don't need your false protection anymore.