III. "but there's still me"
here's to the girls with the impossible choice
and shattered lives and stolen dreams
here's to the girls who have lost
e v e r y t h i n g
awoken to face every new day
the constant
the unshakeable
the girls who rebuild their worlds and their lives
with what tools they have left
so that they can keep doing
the right thing

II. "you don't even know how hard this was."
here's to the girls with the unshakeable purpose
and unbending determination and stone hearts
here's to the girls who have continued
when all hope seems lost
fought for the greater good
the martyrs
the messiahs
the girls who sacrificed themselves
for the sake of their people
and no one ever knew
and no one will ever know.

I. "you know nothing about me"
here's to the girls with the brave faces
and tattered souls and steely eyes.
here's to the girls who have
survived the impossible
borne more than anyone should ever have to bear
the misunderstood
the broken
the girls who took the duct tape and put themselves back together
because they couldn't bear the touch of anyone else.

i'm proud of us.
i'm proud of you and me.

but i'm not me anymore.
and there is no you.

( there is nothing to be proud of anymore. )

i heard you calling,
early in the morning.
i heard your voice
and all the pain
                  brother, please!
                  i'm sorry.
i heard you beg.
beg me to bring
you back.
                   please, take me back!          
                  i can't.
i heard you cry.
for me to come
and fix you.
and rescue you
from the darkness
                  brother, save me!
                  no, brother. i won't.
i heard you scream
and i watched as
Heaven's Morning Star
bent and broke
as my brother
declared his hate
                  i hate you, brother. i never loved you.
                  (there was no answer.)
day after day,
night after night,
i listened and heard.
but the important part
is i did nothing.
                  forgive me, brother.
                  *never.

.
come on honey
let's go do something
new
we could record a
platinum record
or skydive off the Eiffel tower
we could sail across
the atlantic
or climb a big
ol' mountain

or maybe
we could just fall in
love
and dance among the stars.

yes,
that sounds about right to me

There is a lonely man in a big blue box

He says that he hates goodbyes.

Most people are disbelieving, they scoff:

They think that he outright lies.

Others sometimes wonder:

What past events underlie

To make this one Time Lord dislike goodbyes?

He's always alone, this man.

His companions are long gone.

Every time he says hello,

Every time he crashes into a lawn,

Every time he helps or saves,

Every time he meets someone:

There's always a goodbye.

He had a family, all the same.

Yet they are gone now.

He had his Gallifreyan friends

With whom he would play games.

He had his whole planet with its orange skies

But it went up in equally orange flames.

There's always a goodbye.

Some of his companions are still around.

That could be enough for him to smile.

For him to grin wide and say, "Yay!"

But then he remembers that others are lost.

How many people, he couldn't say.

So when this Time Lord dreams

He thinks of a wonderful, happy day.

In which all his friends are here to stay:

And he can still "vworp" away to Gallifrey.

You, a traveller, a helper, a god,

You, a wanderer, a drifter, so odd.

You, a warrior, a killer, of hate,

You, a redeemer, a healer, too late.

You, who lost, and never could find,

You, so sad, it made you more kind.

You, drenched, in the blood of whole worlds,

You, with secrets, that never unfurl.

You, eyes dark, with sorrow and guilt,

You, with renown you regret being built.

You, who travels across the great skies,

You, with such rage in your ancient eyes.

You, so easy, to just jump off the shelf,

You, who loathes nothing more than yourself.

You, who feels pain, in every breath,

You, who'd be thankful, for the gift of sweet death.

The man who lives upon a cloud

Separate from the world

He picks his way through peace and war

If only to observe

The man who drifts above us all

Has no known kith or kin

He lives and breathes his every breath

With memory of sin

The man who harbours two cold hearts

And cannot ever die

He suffers twice the love and loss

This is why he lies

The man who tries to stop himself

From ever getting close

To any human he might so meet

No losses he shall host

The man who lives upon a cloud

Alone in the sky

This way he never says hello

Or has to say goodbye

Police box

Pull to open

Deepest shade of blue

Stole a mad man

Ran away

Off to see the universe

Each swirl and spark of time

The galaxies of space

Infinite possibilities

So easy to be lost

And never found

Flying through oblivion

Hope you don't fall

Into the black

Where light cannot touch

With its soft, yearning fingers

And dark awaits

With greedy hands

So fly

Don't ever stop

TARDIS and her mad man

Keep running

Don't stop

Souls and sights come and go

Losses and finds

Beginnings and ends

But ever constant

Are the TARDIS and her mad man

Always running

Never stopping

Lest they fall

Into the black

And end

So they run

The mad man

And

His

Police box

Pull to open

Poetry is just a tool

To speak your mind, not serve as rule.

Constructed help to bear one's soul,

Declare one's love, or friend console.

To speak in verse is but a scheme,

A packaging for fancy dream.

Fixing meter's common place,

But it's up to the writer's taste.

To rhyme, to pair these simple sounds,

To fuel the whimsy, feed these hounds,

Can sometimes be itself a crutch,

Or hind'rance if it's used too much.

The feeling and it's heartfelt message,

Speak more than some structured presage;

Create your voice from humble words,

An ode or sonnet, praise or gird.

Loose your arrows, verbal arcs,

And dot the Earth with sharp remarks

And when the last launched barb should fall,

Who minds if they should rhyme at all?

One is for the Timelords

Two of them are left

Three is for the schism  

Four, now here they come

One is for their friendship

Two is for their feud

Three is for the fob watch

Four, the last He'll see of you

One is for his triumph

Two is for his pain

Three is for the head bumps

Four, that were driving him insane

One and Two and Three and Four

The drums, which called to war

The white walls creak and crack
as blue paint flows freely.
Higher and higher we must go
the voice outside leading our way.
Faster and faster we must go as colors
blur into one, orange white and blue.
Completing the trails one by one. Hear
the champers sing out "I don't blame you".
The monotone voices ring out as one
when our feet leave the ground. But
Beware the light for it will burn till only
darkness remains. The very air we breath
would **** death it self. Smarter still we
must become when life hands us lemons
when all I asked for was more time.
But do not fear, for this was a triumph.
We do what me must, because we can.

The Story of Portal

'Tis an interesting story I must convey
About what started on Bring Your Daughter to Work Day.
It was to be the main event,
But no one knew to what extent.

Upon picoseconds of her wake,
Deadly Neurotoxin she did take.
A hissing sound was heard by all,
And a green gas started to fill the hall.

One by one people fell.
Most were dead, but not little Chell.
She was a stubborn child,
But that was putting it mild.

A Morality Core was installed.
To keep the rest of the Center from being mauled.
GLaDOS was switched back on
And Test Subjects were called upon.

Years later, a Subject was picked.
No one knew what to predict.
She was stubborn and quiet,
But boy, did she cause quite the riot.

Chell was never meant to test,
But fate was changed by an unwelcome guest.
In the maintenance areas, a Rat did flee,
Leaving hints for the young ******.

GLaDOS gave a final goodbye speech;
A fire pit Chell did reach,
But some portals she did use
To escape from the abuse.

Chell and GLaDOS met face to face.
This would be GLaDOS' final resting place.
A surprise was deployed
And Chell threw it into the void.

Deadly Neurotoxin again filled the room.
Six minutes and Chell would reach her doom.
"Stop squirming and die like an adult."
Chell didn't think she would like the result.

Three more times she would open the door
And drop down another core.
The fight was done,
And with it went the gas and the gun.

The rouge AI was enraged.
She had been upstaged.
The Enrichment Center's systems started to fail.
Oh how Chell wished she could bail.

Chell had finished her mission.
Now, she rested in the Party Escort Position.
Escorted back inside, she tried not to cry.
For she knew that the Cake was a Lie.

"Hello sweetie"
I always say it, every meeting
Every single happy greeting
As long as my hearts keep beating
Always, always, still repeating

I loved you so, we had no fears
To the end, our path did veer.
Tried not to shed a single tear
As you traveled through the years.

Now then, we must not pretend
That there will never be an end
For now I have my hand to lend
We will not break, but we will bend

It's now time to stop repeating
This is not a happy greeting
Love, we cannot keep on meeting
It's time to say it, stop your pleading,
"Goodbye, Sweetie"

Dovahkiin,
Dovahkiin,
Greybeards have summoned thee
High Hrothgar, where they stay,
Their Thu'ums at play...

Fus Ro Dah,
Fus Ro Dah,
Your spirit is unleashed,
In a whirlwind
Untamed.

Dovahkiin,
Dovahkiin,
Learn the deadly Dragonrend..
Shout it in glee,
Bring Alduin to his knees...

Travel north,
Travel south,
Travel all through Tamriel
In search for a scroll...
Untold.

Dovahkiin,
Dovahkiin,
Call upon your dragon...
Clearing foggy skies
In Sovngarde, where we lie...

Bring him down,
Down to the ground
Relinquishing his power...
Here lies the slain
Alduin...

Dovahkiin
Dovahkiin,
In all of your glory
You brought him to his knees,
A dragon, obscene...

It will be told
Forevermore
This story of a dragonborn
Who slay Alduin...
Dovahkiin...

I was born of fire,

of a simple flame.

I save many worlds,

yet I take no blame.

It all dwindles away,

into my dark past.

What applause I do get,

it will never last.

I was born of ice,

frozen, cold, and blue.

I am a burden of frost,

a very bitter one, too.

A man of lost love.

A man of lost friends.

My companions die

as my life never ends.

I was born of rage,

war, cruelty, and hate.

That never really changes

once I regenerate.

In this war I face,

I'm a truly lost soldier.

But, you see, I won.

The Time War is over.

Once you have seen me

I will never be a blur.

For my true name is lost,

so just call me The Doctor

In the Beginning, you were given:

Two eyes - to see the universe
Two ears - to hear the TARDIS song
Two feet - to dance among the stars
Two hands - to bring your friends along
Two lips - to speak in tongues so sweet
Two hearts - to love all you meet

Then you grew old, and these are what you have:

Two eyes - that can see naught but hate
Two ears - that ring with screams of fear
Two feet - that flee the Storm innate
Two hands - drenched with blood and tears
Two lips - that taste of ash and smoke
Two hearts - mangled, shredded, broke

Then you met a girl who saved you -
and these are all the things she gave you:

Two eyes - to see again the light
Two ears - to hear her laugh and rave
Two feet - to dance with her all night
Two hands - to hold and keep her safe
Two lips - to speak of life again
Two hearts - to trust once more in men

Then she was gone, and this is what is left:

Two eyes - like ice that burn with pain
Two ears - that ache to hear her speak
Two feet - that run as if they're lame
Two hands - that can't touch what they seek
Two lips - again taste only ash
Two hearts - again like shattered glass

You gain a friend, you lose a friend,
Over and over, and in the end:

Eyes
(How often were they renewed? How many times did the blackness recede and return?)
- too tired of the strobing dark and light -

Ears
(How often did screams overwhelm laughter? How many times did you lose a precious voice?)
- almost deaf to cries of delight -

Feet
(How many miles have you run? How often did you flee the disasters you have caused?)
- blistered, bloodied, endless flight -

Hands
(How many did you hold, then cast away? How many did you condemn rather than forgive?)
- merciless in the unending fight -

Lips
(How many names did you speak into life? How many more did you speak into death?)
- speaking words that will never heal the blight -

Hearts
(How often did you break? How many pieces did you leave scattered through time and space?)
- shattered -
(Was there ever a time when they were whole?)
- broken -
(It's been so long)
- torn -
(I can't remember)
- shredded -
(Did I perhaps start out with one?)
- and never made right -

Hearts
Do I have two or four or ten
after breaking again and again?

My dearest doctor of old,

Your story forever told,

You fly along through time and space,

After bad monsters you chase,

Protecting the children of the world,

Stopping time from being unfurled,

The people you met and traveled with,

Clara believed you were a myth,

She found you in your palace of cloud,

Far from the ground in a stark white shroud,

You had lost all hope,

Up in your palace you mope.

Then Clara you met,

It was fate and was set,

That the girl twice dead,

Would clear your head,

The lonely old doctor with his bluest blue box,

Twas only Clara that could knock off his socks,

Are you alright, she asks

I'm always alright, he replies

But he's not alright

Not at all

And he hasn't been

Not in a long time

Do you want to talk about it, she asks

No, he says

Never

Promise me you'll deal with it then, she says

Nothing happens

Fresh curiosity

Fresh concern

Can you deal with it this time, she asks

He answers now

Of course I can deal with it, he assures

He'd like to believe it

He really would

He wants to be able to deal with it

But he just doesn't know if he's able to

Part of his mind is telling him that no, he can't deal with this

He doesn't like listening it that part of himself

He listens to that part that says that he can deal

Though it is less sure

And these two mindsets, they clash together

Each hoping for supremacy over the other

Can

Can't

**Won't

You are

the Doctor,

flying through time and space

in your little blue box

that's not-so-little

on the inside.

You've had many friends-

companions-

over the course

of your adventures

but

something always

goes wrong

and

they leave you,

or you

leave them.

And there are

gaps of time

when you are

alone and

it eats you up

because

in the silence

you can hear

your memories clamoring,

shouting for your attention

and you do not

want to hear them.

So you

continue on,

running from your past

though you always

tell yourself

you aren't

and some days

you believe it.

But the truth

is always there

lurking

in the back of your mind

like a hungry

predator.

So you keep running

and tell yourself you aren't,

because

admitting you are

is the first step

to facing

your deepest fears

and staring in the face

all your mistakes,

all the times you've been wrong

all the faces you've lost

all the wrongs you've done

and you are afraid

that they will swallow you whole

if you try.

So you don't.

They say there's a man called the Doctor

With two hearts and a magical box.

If you travel with him—

Dash away on a whim—

You will find he is lost when he talks.

"Hello!" he will say; "I'm the Doctor!"

Yet there's something so sad in his grin.

He won't voice it to you,

Lest he spoil your view,

But he dreams of and yearns for his kin.

And the awful thing about the Doctor,

Which he rues and resents but requires,

Is that everyone leaves

And his loneliness cleaves

Both his hearts and their desperate desires.

So if ever you meet the good Doctor,

If he offers to take you away,

And if you fall in love,

Know that he stands above—

Don't expect him to want you to stay

Earth/Terrae

Fires light the sky

Smoke and grass

The lemurs stand

Watchful glance

Society crumbles

The fall of man

Mother earth rumbles

She's taking back her land

All that's left

Make a stand

The sheep move

While the eagles soar

A follower today

Leading them to shore

Tears now

Breathe is gone

Body alight

One soul

One sound

This green ignites

A blaze of color

New earth

It stands asunder

Allow the currents to fall

Staring in wonder

Half a pint is still a cup

A good amount to drink

Half a blink means so much more

As a secret wink

Half an earbud works just right

To hear two things at once

Half a pencil's all you need

To keep drawing for months

Half a shoe is best for sun

And splashing in the sea

Half a notebook feels just right

To write a short story

Half a secret's good enough

To keep your mind at bay

And that's the way it ought to be

Until I'm brave someday

You've killed us with sword, and you've killed us with bow

Killed us by dropping us down far below

You take our remains and use them for crafting,

Now, Minecrafter, we have questions for asking.

Which of us 'mobs' do you the most fear?

Who makes you shake when our name you do hear?

Answer us, Notch-Child, answer us well

Your innermost fears to us you shall tell.

Is the Creeper, the camouflaged one

That scares you the most (Even in the Sun)?

For whenever he sees you, he flashes in white,

And will, lest vanquished, explode in the night?

Maybe the Zombie, who travels in hordes,

Attacking Testificates, breaking down doors?

When the terrible moan comes forth from his throat,

Do you despair, do you lose all hope?

Perhaps a Skeleton, wielding his bow,

Is he – do you think – the most terrible foe?

The ****** that sees you, wherever you are,

Draws back his weapon and kills from afar?

Could it be a Spider, eyes glowing red,

That climbs up the walls, does he fill you with dread?

Perchance it's his brother, down in the mines,

With poisonous fangs he waits, biding his time?

Perchance the Silverfish, hiding in rock,

That swarm and attack should you break down its block?

Is it them you fear whilst exploring the caves

Faced with them, can you call yourself brave?

Or the Slime, living far underground

That scares you away with its odd shape and sound?

The small ones can't hurt you, that much is true,

But the largest ones bring harm swiftly to you.

You've crafted a portal, and think yourself clever,

But can you withstand our dear friends in the Nether?

They dwell in a land full of lava and fire

Do you fear the ones in the burning mire?

The Zombie Pigman, needing no explanation,

They protect one another, an undead nation.

Are they the ones that you find most frightening?

And appear in Overworld when a pig's struck by lightning?

Is it the Ghast, silver tear in its eye,

That scares you away and makes you cry?

It really is best not to get in one's way

If one shot at you, would you run from the fray?

What of the Blaze, whose body burns bright,

Guardian of fortresses, that sets you alight?

Maybe it's they who send you running to

Your home where you dream of the water deep blue.

We're nearing the End of our little game,

Our question, however, is always the same.

Are you scared of the 'mobs' in the land full of void?

Or maybe, perhaps, you're just vaguely annoyed?

Fear you the Enderman, standing so tall

Him do you fear, the most of all?

Look not to his eyes or he'll teleport near you

And **** unless you swim in water clear and blue.

Or the Dragon, whom to leave the End you must fight,

That heals himself with pillars of light?

He flies through the air, majestic and black,

But face him you must, for there's no turning back.

You've killed us with lava, killed us by drowning,

But now whom the most fearful one are you crowning?

You've killed us, even, with your bare fists.

For now, questions answered, we retreat to the mists.



Which mob do YOU fear?

Roses are red.
Portals are blue.
How can I explain the feelings of love for you?
I gave you a turret, Shiny and new.
You gave it right back, because it shot bullets into you.
I gave you a Cube Companion, weighted and fine.
You threw it down a hole, because it threatened to stab you all the time.
I gave you a combustible lemon, nice and ripe.
You burned my house down in the middle of the night.
I gave you real confetti, Colorful and full of taste.
You threw it away, because it was just taking up space.
I gave you a portal of orange and blue
You saw that I loved you and now you do too