Maintaining to maintain stability while slightly overwhelmed, over thinking, and over budgeting, but these burdens aren't the end of the world, right??  Confidence, it seems, has been dwindling as of late.
Even in my dreams there is need for me to Buck the f#ck up.
Must Be a perfect Buttercup..
I cannot allow this superficial madness to weaken an already compromised state of health.
Some Vitamin C if you please?
Some more Tea? Perhaps Pass me the Honey.
Haven't thou time to sit and mend any more wound of these wounDs?
Gaping flesh has been cauteriized and it seems no lingering infection remains.
However, Hindsight only clears up the front facing views!
Both eyes open.
Pay attention to the Signs.
Objects and objectives may be closer than then they appear in the reflective inner scope of the mind.
I'm Getting back my 20/20.
Working More, must have money.
I just need to get through this Two thousand folded Eight teen.
Some days feel like Sparta, deep within the Lions den of ones soul. The Swords are drawn, a large crowd circles near and I have nothing left to fear. For I have Faith and much strength within this mind!
I am Ring Master Renegade, undefeated through this life's twisted charade.
The dust finally settles, the silent crowd grows still, And I live to fight another day.. .. .

Definitely defying distant memories of a time well spent on deepening the gaze into reality vs fiction.
Lives lost in the shuffle of pleasantries and social wannabes.
I know what the hell I don't want to understand in this life's dos and don'ts.
Hanging mirrored picture frames mixed with printed wooden Scrabble games.
The minds best outlet for verbal spewage across and in-between these thick painted lines on green plastic grassroots.
And the Stadium is packed full!
Outfitting Batman's infantries while shrouding Robin's hideouts.
Burning bushes know much pain while badges shine at lights out.
Find your passions through these smoking guns are tagged with stain.  F#ck the rules and F#ck yourself bewitching your betrayed.
Handcuffed concrete convicts can't contain who holds the key.  
m olding, Move ing, working parts to  Help The  bl I nded see…,,,...
07/02/2019
L. DeCypher

Wake up, I'm still breathing
Deep breath, Sun still shines
Scattered thoughts, Need to focus
Determination, Now's the time
Moments pass, Familiar faces
Small towns, I've seen these names.
Past employment?
Residential greetings?
Does it really matter? Seasons change.
One step forward, Never backward.
Head held high, There is no shame.
The ones we've lost Will not be forgotten
They are gone But not in vain.
Open minded, Training neurons
Information sticks like glue
Coherent words, expressed, Well spoken
Living
Learning
Right on que.
Kitchen decals, Pen to paper,
Carbon copies, Bruised Left thigh
Inspiration
Beat
ing
Bleed
ing
What's the Question?
Am I me??
Or I know I??
I Am a Nurse
And Fearless fighter
I'm a mother and a Friend
Unfinished Masterpiece in progress
With no Beginning, without End
I am Perfect Imperfections.
A constant journey to improve.
I am Light containing Darkness
I'm sometimes wrong, but who are you??!
I Am Flesh and Bone Created by Unmoved mover of all that IS.
I am student, sometimes teacher
I'm not labelled by past ****!
I'm Slightly damaged, Never broken
Bruises fade, These Bones do mend
I'm organizing matter..
Reestablish
Reinvent
Ing
Reunite
Ing
Inner Freedom
To try and Place my Faces to the Place to Face your Name-

L. DeCypher

I rise, re calibrating mind's eye while seemingly sized up i realize that real eyes see straight through what lies upon rubble of distorted space and time. factor out F-iction from
fabricat-E-d pixels of sepia pictures. contemplating albums of step up or kiss my derriere. torn corners slightly f-Aded not jaded various images a-Re still scene. pass me the ******* jack crumbs li-Ning the pockets of p-Ollys blue babydoll jeans. percep-Tion is depth within regardless of judgement not swaying determination as long as t-Hese lungs live and breathe.  rediscovering strength inside  mazes of why did -I’s? regrets are for those filled with shame. trusti-Ng in something believe with the knowin-G that faith burrows through mortal pain....

TRUST
Faith
Hope
Belief
Some say...People don't change
I say... Situations can change people
For the better,Or for worse
Difficult to watch some things...
And I know both sides of those fences all too well
Defenseless
Against those words that shall not break bones.
Hmmmm...Deciding….
Abiding my Timing is , right, not perfect, as word so eloquently pointed.
Testing my loyal ties
Twisted truth spawned from lies
And now I decide who is deceiver¿
So very Smart he is, definitely more capable...
However, ignorance does not guarantee truth..
Upper hands betting on charming..
But sometimes conniving can be conjured by crude...
Hunting the hunter quite disturbing…
Written warnings from friend or true foe?
Inquiries strike open neurons
What it is you reap, you will sow
Real eyes Realize Real lies…..
And my visions 20/20...

06-02-2019

Live your life in the Moments...In the End its only the countless compilation of exponential fragmented moments that encompass the entirety of a life once lived...

Interesting,
this life in which we live.
Counting my blessings like freshly dried sheep skins until insomnia has been successfully subdued.
I am Awakened by the light of this brand new day.
These tangled webs we so willingly weave are easily manageable as long as one never forgets to remember that our limbs were designed to dance across them.
Silken geometric patterns Perfectly Placed in time and space.
Parkour.
A continuum of the infinite.
An extension of the miraculous. Dancing to the Beat....

Gauging the stability
         of minds that fit not into the
Bell Curves or catalogs of symptomatic Checklists in Diagnostic books bound
                         By blood......

-2011 Days of November-

Forever searching for what exists below the surface.
Needing to find what
remains of a once timeless paradise.
An ancient world that my heart has always known, but my eyes have yet to see.
Forever am I meant to crawl beneath the burning flesh of so many weak and tortured souls?
Am I to spend an eternity searching through endless piles of ash and blood stained stone?
The soul left aching with ghostly echoes of my lost one,
Your beautiful song silenced with a lifetime of pain.
In this world,
there exists no more singing.
Only the distant sounds of charred metal, Crushing bone.
Where the tongues and great minds of men were defeated,
compassion hiding behind masks of power fueled rage.
Too many are those,
afraid to ask the right questions,
Never doubting what their eyes may have seen.
So many Answers, ignored and unwanted,
Never seeking to find out what it all really means.
So it is here, I will stay,
swallowed in darkness.
Lost and Alone,
my soul awaits your song.
Until then,
Im forever here, decaying in silence.
Beneath the pain, Beneath the fear, Beneath it all.

L. Decypher

Silence Those words....
Forever etched within my minds eye. Winter ramblings of a lost soul cast down from the heavens above?
As if Lying to yourself wasn't painful enough….
Found your back against those concrete walls countless times and yet I forever had yours...
Mine currently sore from the blade you strategically placed.....

Fear exists not when you've spent your life Fighting the Fight can't exist without Fear...

Falling deeper into the dark abyss of time
Searching for the light that I once held so close.
Days pass by and the fire dims, leaving behind a blanket of fiery earth.
A thousand golden embers left alone to fade into the cold dark emptiness of
tomorrow.
Still falling, I continue deeper, consumed by darkness,
Broken and torn from the the icy windstorm of existence.
Forever needing the burning flames to melt the frost from my frozen heart.
Lost and alone, I am left to lye down on stained flesh,
still wet and dripping from wounds that will never heal.
I remain still, eyes blinded by emotion, waiting for the
Tiny streams of sadness to slowly wash away a hardened mask of pain.
It is here I will stay, fading into the surrounding blackness,
Like a tiny golden ember deserted by the fire......