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210 · Jan 2016
It's Not For Me
FA12AMstorm Jan 2016
Please stop saying its a stupid mistake. Because for me it's the right choice. You may not get it but I'll try to explain. I get that it might cost more money. I need you to understand though, I can't stay in this place. This town, at this time, seems too small for my dreams and God's plan for my life. I need to get out. I can't spend a year more than I have to stuck in these classrooms and these halls. It's not right for me. I can't go through eighteen more months after this semester with these people. Let me say this though: I've connected with a lot of people here. All of them have gone away, finding their own paths. Some I pushed away because I knew they weren't for me. I don't want to have to push you away, but the way you keep talking might just push me to that point. Honestly, I love connecting with people, but this town is too small for that. I want to travel, I want to see as much of the world as I can. On those roads going anywhere, I want God to point out the one I should take. I can't do that stuck in this world, this box, that you try to keep me in. I suffocate in these rooms. Luckily, I am tall enough that my head breaks through the ceiling. What I see past this place are passions and other places that I want to see. So you can stay in this town where nothing happens. Stay on the roads that will take you no farther than you've ever gone. Maybe that's enough for you. Not for me. Why can't you understand that I need out?
210 · Jan 2016
Untitled
FA12AMstorm Jan 2016
Tattoo me like my favorite pages from every book
209 · May 2016
Hell is not where you are
FA12AMstorm May 2016
They say "I'd go to hell and back for you"
But baby I'd never have to
Because Hell isnt a place where angels go
208 · Dec 2015
Toxic
FA12AMstorm Dec 2015
Toxic things don't freeze. Which is why I wonder why it is that when I found you, your heart was already frozen.
207 · Feb 2016
Tortured
FA12AMstorm Feb 2016
I can't do this much longer
Every day I feel my back shrug a little more
I feel my voice going silent
I feel my soul being beaten to a pulp filled with only my blood
I feel imagination being ripped from me
I feel my feet dragging
I feel my heart shrinking
I hear my mind screaming
**I feel tortured
205 · Dec 2015
You Promised
FA12AMstorm Dec 2015
You promised to not let me drown
And then you pushed me where my toes couldn't reach and the waves took lives

You promised to not let me burn
Then you laughed and watched as the fire consumed me and all I was

You promised to shelter me from the storm
Then you ran in fear when the storm took hold and stirred in my eyes

You promised to be my solid ground if my world shook
Then when it gave its first rumble of a warning
You ran like the coward I now know you are

You promised forever
I tried to catch your eye the next day
But all you did was walk away

You promised a lot of things
You lied
I got to thinking

Maybe it was just me
Then I realized:

Love is like water
I could have been your ocean

Fire is passion
Passion is what I live for

The storm is intense
And I hold one in my eyes

I am the earthquake that shakes
Leaving you with nothing to stand on

Forever wasn't supposed to be with you
Because I'm looking for a man
And you are simply a boy
205 · Oct 2015
Rather
FA12AMstorm Oct 2015
I'd rather fight on my knees for what I believe to be true, than stand on my feet for nothing.
205 · Jan 2016
Improv
FA12AMstorm Jan 2016
I think that life, in its purest form, is simply a giant game of improvisation. You can plan and plan and plan, but at the end of the day, in that moment, the words you say, the day you have isn't something you can plan. It's something you have to go with, a story you write as you go along. You can't memorize the lines to a story yet to be written. It's a moment by moment life. I think a lot of people forget that.
205 · Nov 2015
I Am
FA12AMstorm Nov 2015
I am A
Rebel Heart
Intelligent Mind
Free Soul
Strong Body
Living Masterpiece
I am Not a Game
So don't even try to play me
203 · Jan 2016
Page and a Voice
FA12AMstorm Jan 2016
I like to use my voice in the silence of a page and a pen.
201 · Dec 2015
Untitled
FA12AMstorm Dec 2015
You can try and take the limelight. The real stars shine all on their own.
191 · Feb 2016
Guillotine
FA12AMstorm Feb 2016
I'm tired of being people's punching bag
I'm the thing they practice all their moves on
Beating me senseless with every new torture technique they find
What they're trying for though isn't boxing
It's a game that ends you
They **** me everyday
Trying to prepare themselves for a war
I go through a war everyday day and
every night

I used to think I was strong
Used to
But apparently other people haven't stopped thinking that because they keep coming back
They don't come back for me
They come back for what I can offer
The only things they give me is
Pain-filled company
Beatings
Heartache

Maybe they don't actually think I'm strong enough and that's why they keep coming back
They leave thinking I'm broken
Only to return and find out they were wrong
I'm not sure if that's good
I'm not sure if it's good that I won't break
Because it doesn't feel like it
It feels like I'm losing
I hate losing
But I don't know how to win this war

They're supposed to be training to fight in a different war
They supposed to fight with and beside me
But they throw punches my way
I don't know how to fight back
Should I?
They're supposed to be my friends
Maybe I'm wrong and they're trying to simply break down my walls

I built strong walls
I know that
It was on purpose
I would love for someone to try and break them
I want  someone to fight for me
But why does it feel like they're fighting against me?
I want them to tear into me and find my soul; to connect with it
What it seems like they're doing is beating me so I can no longer stand
That way it's easier to **lay my head in the guillotine
188 · Jan 2016
Writing
FA12AMstorm Jan 2016
I love writing. It's one of many forms of art. It allows me to tell a story that, technically, has already told before. The thing is that it's never been written by me. That's what makes it unique. That's what makes writing great.
187 · Dec 2015
Easy Come Easy Go
FA12AMstorm Dec 2015
I'd tell you who I am
If I thought you would care
I'd show you my flaws
If I thought you wouldn't tell
I'd give you my all
If I thought you'd do the same
I would put down my walls
If I thought you would be there for me
I would express to you my dreams
If I thought you would listen
I would tell you my passions and who I want to be
But I have been betrayed many times
I've given so many people a shot
And all they've ever done is pulled the trigger after I gave them the bullet

And that is why it's easy come easy go
I've before done this before
So don't you think I'll cry
I'll keep both my eyes dry
Because I'm done with you
And there's no way you can get me back
FA12AMstorm Jan 2016
I know that when you talk too much people will start disregarding what you say. The problem is I can't decide when it's my time to speak. So I stay silent. When do I fight, how do I know what battles I need to win in order to win the war?
176 · Apr 2016
Without You
FA12AMstorm Apr 2016
When you tell yourself:
"I can't do this"
Say "without You"
At the end
While pointing towards God.
173 · Oct 2015
You See Me
FA12AMstorm Oct 2015
You see me as weak
or you see me as strong.
The problem is that either way,
You're not seeing me.
You see the emotions I show,
Maybe even sometimes
the ones I try so desperately to hide.
You see the feelings,
Not the person.
The person is someone altogether.
Not what you think you see for a moment.
171 · Jan 2016
How Many?
FA12AMstorm Jan 2016
I see things talking about how when people die their story has ended
And yet, how many poets wrote their life away only to be known after they passed?
How many painters brought color to everyday life, only for it to be truly seen after they're long gone?
How many writers took a pen and wrote their last breath on paper, only for it's brilliance to take life after they died?
How many more will have to suffer this same fate?
To live a life of passion in art, only to be written off?
Then, to be seen from beyond the grave
How many more will only be heard when they have no more breath to speak with?
How many more will only be understood when death takes their ability to stand?
So please, don't tell me that when death takes me, I will have lived the last word in my story.
169 · Mar 2016
Never Know
FA12AMstorm Mar 2016
They call me a rebel
They might be right
They could be wrong
It's possible I'm innocent
But they'll never know
Because I'm sure they'll never wait and see
168 · Jan 2016
Anonymous
FA12AMstorm Jan 2016
I don't mind you reading my heart, as long as you don't know my name.
165 · Jan 2016
Not Sure If You'll Get It
FA12AMstorm Jan 2016
Without art, the heart is a he.
163 · Oct 2015
Time
FA12AMstorm Oct 2015
Time is like sand
You don't know it's gone
till it's out of your hand
Still we just live on

We watch all our moments
And think that it's ours
but moments belong in an hourglass
We're sitting here watching them pass
163 · Nov 2015
Tell Me Once More
FA12AMstorm Nov 2015
Tell me once more
How I'm wrong
Say all the words you told me before
And how you don't see how they hurt me

Tell me once more
How I'm worthless
How I'll never make it farther
Than this street I'm on

Tell me again
Just know this time I'm not listening
I've spent all my time believing you
Look me in the eye and you'll know
I won't make that mistake again

Tell me once more
How I'm not beautiful
In your eyes
And I'll let you know how you're wrong

Tell me once more
How these scars define me
I'll have you know
That there's more to the story than you'll ever hear
163 · Feb 2016
Im not sure
FA12AMstorm Feb 2016
I'm not sure if I can fight to stay alive
Or even if I'm willing to die
I'm at the point where I just don't know
I so wanna fly
But I'm stuck on the the ground
I want to just float
But the waves reach for me
I need to run
But I don't know what I'm running from
143 · Apr 2016
The Best
FA12AMstorm Apr 2016
I feel like some of the best books are the ones hardest to describe.
142 · Dec 2015
Simple
FA12AMstorm Dec 2015
I can, I will, I have written about anything
Everything is up for inspiration for a new story, poem, or song
But I want you to know that when I write about how you walked away
I didn't write with a voice of pain
You walked away and it was simple
Yes, I thought about how my life would be different without you
Yes, I realize it would have been a lot different
Yes, I realize you changed me
No, I don't think I'll ever forget you
No, I don't think I'll ever run out of ways to write our chapter
But that's what you have to realize:
You were only a chapter in my volume of a life
The sad thing is I don't think you ever read the chapters already written,
and yet I listened to every one you were willing to tell me
Maybe that's my fault though
I don't really tell people things about me
If you were trying to get me to miss you
Then you need to try a LOT harder
Because I don't think I've cried over you once
I don't plan on it either
Because as I said before, you leaving me was simple
It was the cut that you don't feel
The one that heals without you knowing it was there in the first place

— The End —