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daizy Nov 2022
The cemetery of my mind, my body under my heart shaped grave

frustrating spits of rain over my last bouquet that had withered over months. The time I took to fix the stems seems useless as it still decays, beyond myself;

I stay sealed in my casket, a frame on the shelf with my smiling face. I was lost but still -

touching veins, delicately shaking under sheets of white; that then lay me to rest, cold cuts into dead skin

leaving my flesh to breathe in the smoke from stairways of light - resting, left-overs in the morgue.

My corpse unfinished, their hands curing rigor mortis. I hear the mortician whispering, ‘it takes time’

but this void of life inside means I cannot feel growth. His words echoing past my unaware sleep. I’m beyond saving and I show nothing. Aside from,

grinning for my funeral
daizy Jan 2021
cruelty is all I adore
in this nightmare i’ve had several times before
my bed is kissed with blood
from this devotion to violent love
you forced me to believe in
now lilies flower from my heart breaking
reliving all you did in dreams
so I lie awake, petals bursting at my seams

still waiting for you to disappear completely
daizy Jul 2020
i live in the heart of my predator
once blissfully unaware
sleeping in pink floral sheets

now wallpaper white and withered
have curled into teeth
dripping blooming lilies

knowing this i still crawl into my hunter's mouth
and cry to sleep
as prey for my own home
daizy Jul 2020
-
this october i will never leave my bed
until all my friends think i am dead
i'll be sleeping in my grave this halloween
daizy Jul 2020
i'm living in my haunted house
with a shadow of myself
and about ten others too
in my haunted house
i'm a ghost in my own room
where i lost my mind over and over
so i'm never going home
daizy Mar 2020
you choose to appear
so deliberately
when i find something delicate

i am hopeless
with your presence
treading so lightly in love

to keep you away

my worries turn to prayers
i recite every fleeting
yet everlasting moment you are here

when will i forget (you)?
daizy Feb 2020
-
i woke up in a tear stained lace dress black boots
still drunk with bruised wrists i woke up delicate
feeling hallow i woke up hopeless & next to a
man much older than me no longer innocent
haunted by what he had done still believing he
loved me i woke up ******* manic on a monday
morning to run barefoot & say goodbye to my
friend for the last time & to get high before college
or school but i cant remember which i woke up
from a bittersweet dream where an awful friend
held me under the flowers to say he was sorry for
the things he couldnt remember but i would never
forget & he told me he was crueler than i can
imagine i woke up wishing it was a real apology i
woke up sick in bed barely breathing from too
many pills i woke up devastated to still be alive i
woke up in a cheap hotel room with a boy i met
once at a gig when we had nothing left to give i
woke up faded on medication with my friends
hand up my skirt & i had made sure to wear my
nicest underwear ivory silk since i knew it would
happen again & woke up crying i woke up
desperate i woke up idyllically lonely under death
in the stars i woke up numb & made of porcelain i
woke up not entirely here & woke up bleeding &
woke up grieving. i woke up in everlasting fear

im not entirely sure if i ever woke up this morning
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