Gratitude:
It pays to be kind
It pays to know
that something's not gonna
be there forever
I'm serious

When that lovely lady passed away
this monster ****** all
the life
out of her
I couldn't help but think
why hadn't i treasured you before
Why oh why

So here is my gratitude poem
I love you mummy
For all the things
From sacrificing your sleep and time
To make me a good breakfast
And ironing uniforms
Which you've always hated to do
But did that all for me
So that I would look decent in school
To Staying up with me
To do homework and revision
before terrifying monsters called EXAMS
For kissing me goodnight and
telling me good things about life
Doing so many lovely things
So that I would have a better life
I love you mummy

I love my dad
No matter how much I seem to argue with you
on math or science
I really love you too.
Deep down I really appreciate your help
but you've got to dig deeper to see that
I hope you talk to me more
About your life
It's always been about my life
my studies
my health
my friends
And our talks
never about you
I never known a genius like you.

*****
You are a *******
Really
I wish you were 5 all again
When you didn't have sarcastic comments
And the I-grew-up-already attitude
I love you all the same
You stay up to help your big sis
With her art work
( I **** at art)
Or type for me in tamil
You do great things, girl
And sooner or later
You are gonna be a great young lady
Just like me

I love all my friends
The ones that hurt me
The ones that love me
The ones that like me
All of you gave
me
experiences
words
advice
stories
that I've never known
What is a life without stories?

And lastly,
my grandpa
You were a great man.
You may have died
When I was one
But I'm telling you grandpa
I love you all the same
I remember your wise words
All the famous people who came to
Shower their blessings on me
And your lovely lap
Which I used to take as my personal bathroom
I'll never forget you
You have an indelible place in my heart
You have been my greatest inspiration
and strongest supporter
I love you all the same.

The things I am grateful for
It's an endless list
But I love each and
every single
one all
the same.
I will treasure you better from now on.


I love you.

So you want to know
Why I don't trust
Anyone
Anyone
Completely
Simple theory:
It's like an acid burn
It leaves a permanent
Ugly
Deformed
Mark

Four years ago,
I saw a future
Full of fun
And laughter

There was this girl
We hit off right away
Best friends forever,
Maybe even 
Sisters

I told her 
Everything
I told her
Anything
I trusted her
Completely
We even kept
A little book
And made little
Friendship keys

So sure
She was the one
Until they came
Along

They made me feel
So at home
They made me feel
I belonged
Not sure when
It started
But there were 
Hateful stares
Annoyed faces
Change in attitude
And then the one
I thought would
Stay
Forever,
She turned
Too

She spilled
Everything
Every
Single
Thing
And turned
And twisted
And moulded
Them into things
that were
Untrue
Spreading them
All around
Turning most
Everyone
A whole class,
(The girls at least,
The boys naturally stayed away)

Humiliated,
Taunted,
Laughed at,
I was turned
Into a joke
A nerd
A complete
Idiot
With the nearest friend
In the next class,
I spent my time
Alone

That day I went back
I cried for an hour
Sitting in a pool
Of ice-cold water
Tears pouring down my face
Wondering
What on earth
Did I do 
Wrong
And that was where
Everything
Changed

That day,
I built my armor.

That day,
I sharpened my weapons.

That day,
My heart died.

That day,
I promised myself
For these things,
I would no longer cry 

That day,
I turned hard and cold.

That day, 
The term
"Best friend"
Lost its meaning
Removed
From my dictionary 

Along with it
Went 
"Trust"

Till now,
I still don't trust
Completely
It can be partially,
Mostly,
Or not at all
You can come close,
Very close.
But the inner most layer,
Is one no one can
Touch

I'm sorry
If I 
Violated
Anyone's trust
Or if
I've hurt you
But this is me.
This is one of 
The Principles
I live by.