I've never been really comfortable with people
My heart is too raw
From the lies, the deceit those expectations not met
All those hoops I was never meant to jump
Stick out like rotten wood on a new fence
But animals?
They speak my language
They are easy to love
Hard to let go and a comfort that goes beyond words

Sometimes I wonder if my words are to vague
To st-ru-ng out in w€i£d stanzas
Dri
       p
         ping from ○dd an》gles
In such that they don't transMUTE
Into working works

Somewhere between four cans
Of sweet metallic madness
I found myself dancing
Lost in the murmuring wave of a rasta beat
Leaning into the bounce and jive of the jammin swing
That made me feel the beat the bellow the warp of time
Closing my eyes to the glowing halo drunk on the feel of rain against my lungs
I did not care
I did not worry
And for a moment I was in no hurry.

It rained like there had never been rain before
Soaking the concrete floor
Dimming the Edison lights
Prickling softly with their golden halos
Sweet easy music danced in the twilight
Melodic, hypnotizing
I could feel it sparkling along my skin
But the real moment was in
How you stood there in that gown
Its crocheted lace cream, wet with mist
An umbrella in hand
It's clear plastic glimmering like jewels Leaning for a kiss
From the man you swore to never live without
It was magic
Though it was wet
Your smile drowned out all the rain.

Words have failed me in the end
Flailing about like some broken thing
Listless and blind
Unable to articulate the sheer terror
I feel creeping from behind the mask
I shove onto my being
Like a child in ill fitting clothes
Smiling as the world burns...

Could love ever shine through this jaded soul
Through the dusted cobwebbed corners
Into that little dark corner I pushed it
To forget about it
To never remember the joy it brought me
The acceptance I still look for
That screams for it from the flat surface of canvas white
Look here
See me
Screaming
Out in that most primal way
Hoping to here it echo in someonelse

Days cake to my fingers
In the cracks and crevices
You find the blacken evidence of my artist vice
Clinging and staining
Following me into those other parts of the day
That demand me to fit
Into a box I've always overflowed
Those bright nail beds scream for freedom
From the eyes of strangers