The pain-
It goes away
But not forever.
It is hidden
By love, lust, fortune,
Maybe even fame.
But the slightest itch
The slightest memory
Can drive one insane.

I remember being six years old
Swallowed by dreams,
Until I realized
Dreams are not what you think.
The sudden taste of forever
Can linger in your mind,
But forever is only a fear
You hide inside.

Forever's not given,
Forever's not kind.
Forever's not something.
You don't understand why.
But rather than dwell,
You just say goodbye.
Goodbye's a lot easier
Than not knowing why.

I wonder if this
Has any meaning to it.
I wonder if my fight for you
Is worth it in the end.
What if I have spent these years
Reliant on the future of us
And created a miserable path for myself?
I don't regret the times we've spent
Or the words we've said,
But what if they mean nothing in the end?
Time will tell, but the sickness in my
Body from waiting for you has
Reached it's limit,
And I feel the virus aching through me.
I may die tonight, tomorrow, ten years from now, or maybe seventy.
But if I am to live for long,
What was the point of focusing on You, and only you?
If I am to live a short span,
What was the good that came from
This bitter situation?
Will I live in hell with closure?
I cannot say I will.
I will live there still in love with you,
Hoping that when you join me
You may admit to loving me as well.
And we can fight the devil together.

What is this feeling
I'm hiding inside?
What is this mask
I seem to stand by?

Why are my feelings uncertain
Yet so very kind?
Why is it you
That lingers on my mind?

When will this feeling
Begin to slide?
When will I be able
To feel alive?

Where are you going
In the dark of night?
Where is the love
That seems to just slide?

Who can make me happy
When looking through my eyes?
Who is waiting for me
To open my mind?