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I see God in my garden, but I don't know what He said...
... perhaps a whisper of a warning; just a murmur in my head.
As I open up the back door and come rushing to His aid,
I'm tripping over fallacies-- cursing the attention I know I should have paid.
But no time for theory, no time for pain.
For God lay in my garden quite possibly slain.

Technicolor eyes and watercolor skin,
Just being this close redeems most of my sins.
Lips begin to part-- a breath escapes with a melody of rasping.
Holding His own heart, He is impotently grasping.
The **** is far too deep and the world is far too cold,
It's His life I want to keep, as His blood drips gold...

Should I pray? Should I weep? Where is God in times like these?
A father, broken... A dream, awoken... I fall on to my knees.

His gaze meets mine... He seems pleasantly surprised... He smiles...

And this is how the world ends. Not with a bang, not with a whimper-- not with a fall from grace;
But with the weight of humanity, the universe and existence, lifting from His face...
2009
I wanted to call you, but my voice just wouldn't speak.
The more I fight with gravity, the more it makes me weak.
In spite of all the trouble, Outside of all the shame
I'm bursting my own bubble, And questioning my name.
Cause is an effect That has no definition.
The loss of self-respect, Creates insane ambitions.

Are you there? Do you hear me?
Are you blind enough to see?
Did you fall enough into my own vanity,
To let me in, to throw you out, to show us that it's really we?
Nothing changes as we change, and change is nothing but hypocrisy.

You point your finger as I do mine,
We run in circles throughout time.
Creating chaos out of nothing,
Demanding truth instead of loving
Destroying trust with aimless worry.

Are you there? Do you hear me?
Are you blind enough to see?
Did you fall enough into my own vanity,
To let me in, to throw you out, to show us that it's really we?
Nothing changes as we change, and change is nothing but hypocrisy.

On your way to the sky, You don't have to teach me how to fly,
Just tell me if it's worth not ever been so high.
I wont resent or curse your name, cuz in my heart you are still the same.
And one last thing that's on my chest;
War is not about who is right, but what is left.
2008
One more hit, one more drink
And you'll forget the pain
If you feel that little stab
Well, down the hatch again
You cannot ignore reality
Dreams only make the pain increase
So take this pill, accept this life
You can do that at least
You don't have to be happy
But you don't have to be sad
Just chill and accept your life
Take this medicine, it will make you feel better
Let it numb you
It will create a reality
Where the past does not exist
It will create a world
Where your emotions aren't overwhelming
Where you can just be,
Free of yourself
And everyone else
Free of worry of time and noise
Free of pain, of love, of choice
You are free of caring if he's there or not,
If he was at all,
That he is not enough.
You are free of the darkness, my friend
But don't let this fool you,
It is not light.
Cool shades and dews are round my way,
And silence of the early day;
Mid the dark rocks that watch his bed,
Glitters the mighty Hudson spread,
Unrippled, save by drops that fall
From shrubs that fringe his mountain wall;
And o'er the clear still water swells
The music of the Sabbath bells.

All, save this little nook of land
Circled with trees, on which I stand;
All, save that line of hills which lie
Suspended in the mimic sky--
Seems a blue void, above, below,
Through which the white clouds come and go,
And from the green world's farthest steep
I gaze into the airy deep.

Loveliest of lovely things are they,
On earth, that soonest pass away.
The rose that lives its little hour
Is prized beyond the sculptured flower.
Even love, long tried and cherished long,
Becomes more tender and more strong,
At thought of that insatiate grave
From which its yearnings cannot save.

River! in this still hour thou hast
Too much of heaven on earth to last;
Nor long may thy still waters lie,
An image of the glorious sky.
Thy fate and mine are not repose,
And ere another evening close,
Thou to thy tides shalt turn again,
And I to seek the crowd of men.
Celestial bells ring in my heart
knowing of a time a'fore
a love so profound, joy abound
a longing to return evermore
spirit thoughts reach out to me
through energy lines above
I hear them almost every day
filling my soul with love
So a love I feel for all mankind
my enemies, my neighbors, and God
an overwhelming happiness
even though the earth I trod
holding hands through it all
when in time of need
call upon your Higher Self
and let your love be free
the past, the present, the future
all tied into one
to reach our goal, our destiny
right where we started from
I should or I shouldn't
I can't or I can
What's my decision, how ,where, or when
I will or I won,t
Iam and I did
The whole world is exploding, like a huge popping lid
I'm happy, I'm sad
Why can't I decide?
Must I always be driver on lifes nowhere ride?
A question,  an answer
Am I wrong , am I right
Why all these decisions?
I'll pretend I'm a kite

— The End —