I will give you access
To my center,
To my core,
My heart and soul-
But my words are my own.

On the stairs I took you
I've never liked to be in control
But I wanted to show you
How much you mean to me-
And how unafraid I was
To show it.
I have said you are not handsome
But now I see your heart
And you are more beautiful
Than any Greek sculpture.
I have said you love was lacking
But now I see your innocence
And your tenderness.
I was quick to judge-
But you are more
Than just the boy in my bed.

I don't trust him.
Or maybe I trust him,
But not with your heart.
I'm not sure if you remember,
But I do.
I remember what he did
To your beautiful heart.
I remember your tears
And I remember that you said,
That you
Did not want to lead him on.
But that is what you are doing.
You are sad because
The one you loved
Has decided your relationship
Is not worth fixing.
Now you are back
With someone who,
May be convenient,
But you said you would not be with.
I know you will do
What is best for your heart-
But as your friend,
I wish you would be careful.

I would rather sit and write,
I would rather study all night,
I would rather drink and fight.
But duty calls me.

Darling,
Your teeth are too sharp
To be chewing on my foot.
Instead, perhaps,
They would be put to better use
Chewing the food that I put down.
Perhaps if you did that
Along with had some water
You would not cry with hunger pains.
When you do that
I promise to play with you
And end your lonely cries.

Tonight there is a party.
They both will go,
And out of pity/politeness/civility
They will invite me.
I know they do not want me to go.
I am certain their friends feel the same.
So I will beg off
And pretend like staying in
With my new canine friend
Will be much more fun.
But the truth is
I would much rather be making
A human connection.
But even if I went
It would not matter much.
Most of my time would be spent
Nursing some alcoholic beverage
Praying for it to last a little longer
And listening to people tell me to loosen up.
I guess I was never made
For these kinds of things
Because I can't loosen up,
No matter how hard I try
No matter how much I drink
No matter how many nights I go home and cry
And swear to be different
So that someday
Someone like-minded
Will look at me and really ask,
"Party time?"

This is where I belong.
The house is quiet;
One is out with a boy-
She offered to take me with,
But what kind of pathetic fool
Do you take me for?
I'm not your third wheel.
Another is up in her room-
Locked in her tower,
And I always wonder
Is she lonely?
The final is in her sanctuary-
I can hear the music blaring,
I don't mind though,
Is she even listening?