Tangled in Desire and Depression
regulated by hostility and sin
whilst those truly guilty
run wild; Controlling their prey

I see what you're doing
all the familiar games, we used to play
jealous of the love I possess
******* happiness like blood

the pain no one helped me through
darkened nights: tear drops on broken glass
the shattered remains of the girl I was
surround the monster I have become

Punch me, Cut me, make me Bleed
just don't break my heart
stitches and way too many shots
falling, deep into my blackened soul

forget who I have killed
don't remember the hearts I kept
taste the flesh under your teeth
then go home before...it's...all...gone

screams that echo through the night
shows the terror I feel,
every time my eyes shut
pain from the past that won't let me go

I wish I could accept the future
but my mind still aches with fear
torn in two by love and pain
dancing to a bittersweet melody of self mutilation

Dark Posters of Skeleton Brides
Video Game pings, and Overflowing Drinks
As Unusual People lay on Hand Me Down Couches
with Tobacco strewn all over my Mom's Old Coffee Table

Barely Voices , No Conversation. Just
BOOM, BOOM BOOM! before I sing aloud
Screams of Joy, "Traplawd Rules"
Kisses on my Nose, Giggling a Little too Loud

Laughter Proceeds Coughing, Funny girly high kicks
"*****, Get Drunk" They tell me, Ah the friends I have
Ragged Carpets over Soft Broken Love Seats
Rough Tobacco stuffed Into Cigarette Tubes

as He Softly Kisses my Arm
**** stubble, tattooed skin
***** Stings, Tabacco burns
Leaving even Baked Goods with a Smokey Flavor

Nothing is what it seems.
It's sad when the butterflies in your stomach let you down
Starting to realize your not worth it
At least no one feels your worth it
Pretending to be strong
Standing up for myself
When I desperately want to fall.
Trying to clear a clouded mind
Intuitive heart alterations.

The dream always starts the same way
Me slowly drifting down the old river
A cigarette in my mouth and
A boy calling my name

My hair flowing behind me
A perfect blend of red and gold
Seductively cute lifeless smiles
The river keeps curving round and round

Down I fall into a convenient rabbit hole
The water tainted with my attitude
Purposefully tempting me to go
Down
            Down
                        Down

The feelings don't go away
Just because you wish they would
New feeling bloom like beautiful flowers
Eyes sparkling with newly inspired desire
Waiting for the curtain to rise, and the act to begin

Life is a series of links between fantastic moments & unforgettable memories:
The moment a stranger pays you kindness
or the feel of a unknown first kiss, with the passion of faded possibility.

Drenched feelings, what's right and what do I feel,
playing around with a new expression; An expression of self degradation:
The lovely bruises that litter my skin shouldn't bring me such wonder.
But I remain here,  
pleading with my heart to stay the bittersweet skips,
as I wait for you to pull me closer, but it never seems to listen:  
Dark prince,
you play with a damaged mind,
one riddled with everyone's problems, and suppresses all her own.
In a game unknown to all but the puppeteers;
Dark Prince,
with a whole new world of ideas, your intoxicating passion rattles me deeper then I dare mention.  
But still;
I beg my heart to stay it's hand as life moves on and
Dark prince,
with words like nurturing bee stings and lips of pure statin drowned in honey,
you are a comforting reminder of a new door opening.
Dark Prince,
pull me closer and hold me tighter,
is it too much to ask for you to protect me from the onslaught of all to clear nightmares.
For minds and hearts such as mine, aren't unfamiliar with the cruel hand, and hollow kisses from a lovers lips with the taste of an old romance,
the tales of woe never interested me anyway.
Dark Prince,
Words are my knives, the only way I can voice what's really inside. The final defense of a forgot but painful war. Take this proclamation with the gentlest of kisses.
For my Dear Dark Prince, we are only at the beginning.