You should have made me feel safe and loved
You should have been there
You should have protected me
I understand she can’t help it
I understand that it’s not your fault
I understand too much of what I shouldn’t understand
I was your responsibility
So why was I responsible for myself?
You gave her too much trust
You never gave me any room to discuss
The traumatic memories go around in my head
Like a movie without an end
The spilling of wine and the reminisce of lies
The shouts echo through the halls when I walk by
This was supposed to make me strong
Yet I am not strong enough to stop the tears in my eyes
This was supposed to make others feel lucky
Yet she says I am ungrateful
What should I be grateful for?
The empty promises
The humiliation
The infinite piles of crushed cans laying in the blue bin
I smell her heroism decay day by day
Her exhaustion nauseates me
You pretend not to see my wounds
You pretend not to hear my cries
Because you of a broken vow
Which is the only thing keeping you from falling apart
I hope to make it in the end
Away from the stench that is indebted in my blood
Away from the weak that aren’t strong enough to fight
Away from her,
Even though she will always be in my head
Away from you, the one who never tucked me in
I hope this story ends
With my hero dead.