I want to
Smell
Touch
Hear
See
Taste
What love is
My slate has been washed clean, a picture not clear anymore
The lines are smeared
The image is faint

I recall it going something like
"Indefinite feeling"
But what has happened to this definition that was once held true
Because this word, indefinite is definitely false

Where is this thing called love
Is it inside me? This I am not sure of anymore
Once it was so obvious what love was
Once it was quite clear that love was forever
Once
Once

Things are different now
Because nothing is indefinite anymore
Not like when we were children, playing games and laughing sweetly
When recess lasted eternity, and nap time lasted much too long (eternity)

Recess is over
Or maybe recess never existed, it was merely a mirage
Maybe love never existed, it was merely a mirage
Maybe
Maybe

So please God, tell me what love is
Help me justify, understand love
Give me love, give me nothing less than your best love
Please
Please

A thought sets off tears
A smile creates sobs
An "are you okay" breaks you
And nothing cures the sorrow you feel
No person
No object
Nothing, leaving you with sadness
Sadness that shrinks you into a fetal position
It feeds, infinitely hungry
A stomach never fully satisfied
And you wallow in this pity that can't be ridden of

The damage is left behind
Not an angel's handyman could patch the hole left behind

Guilt
Anger
Pain and
Fear
This is when everything fails
This is where everything fails

Falling into hell and farther down than known to man
Because of a trip that could have been prevented
But was provoked by someone other than you

That, is where everything fails

Anticipation is a powerful drug. It heals suffering
Looking forward to something, such a fantastic feeling
Everyone should experience Anticipation in their lifetime
Everyone will experience Anticipation in their lifetime
Anticipation kills fear and births happiness
It creates smiles and destroys frowns
And that moment
When you finally feel the ******, the result of all built up Anticipation
Truly jaw dropping
Eye opening
Great

Anticipation is not for everyone, especially people who let it consume themselves too much
And of those with Anxiety
Some find it easy to confuse the feeling of Anxiety with the feeling of Anticipation
A silly mistake, easily fixed with a simple dosage of Realization

Warning, side effects of Anticipation may include
Butterflies
Nausea
Diarrhea
Wanting to sleep the day away to make the thing you are anticipating come faster
Loss of appetite
Over-excitement

This does not effect everyone with Anticipation, however,
One side effect that does inflict all is the satisfaction
The satisfaction of the event behind all of this Anticipation

It's hard to imagine The Close
No one has seen it,
No one will
But some find it easy to contemplate all of the ways to get there
Some believe it's never ending sadness
Others believe it's pure beauty at every corner

It's a scary place, indeed
To be in a position of constant fear of The Close

But I find it easy to fend off this fear
And I do this with *love