So,

I'm trying to
Understand you
Even though
I don't really
Want to
Smooth tricks
All the mental
Ticks
And tocks
Of the brain

Your penchant
For spending
Time alone
And also not
Deep in thought
Guzzling on
The distinguished
Stigma
Of holding
All the
Cosmic grudges

Finding depth
In cantankerous
Plot twists
Keep on adding them
To your
"*******" list
Just see
What you'll get
Keep having
Your fits

Each one
Of your
Personalities
Will double
And you'll
No longer know
Which one caused
You the trouble
You'll fall
When you wake up
And ill-starred
Unaware
Blundering
Through the dark
It's sad to say

You'll forget
Who you are

Broken chairs
Stoves on hot
Cheerios
With milk
On top
Pairs of shoes
Two of kind
Malt and shake
Wrong and right
Wise and smart
All alike
Birds and planes
Both of flight
Children fall
I grow up
Sometimes life's
Just not

Enough

I am not compliant
I'm moody
I'm messy
My shadow is crooked
When it hits
The brick road
The mail man
Nods
Knowing
I'm nothing special
The neighbors
Stare
In curiosity
Of
Who I might be
Become
But really
I'm the outside
I'm the dark night
Nothing special

I want to write
Poems
In my dreams
I want to
Dream poems
Onto the tip
Of my pen
Leak them
Onto my paper
I dream
Of writing poems
Of dreams
Where I write poems
And as I dream
Of dreamless
Poems
Of thoughtless
Bubbles
It comes in a
Wave
The dreams
Of poems
While
I'm awake

I am a waste
A quitter
At everything
Except
The smokes
In my pocket
Stick a fork
In my socket
And restart
Me

Guilt is melting off my face
Everything
It's all in place
The pace I'm moving
Places I'm going
I'm stuck
In pause
What have I done?

Orchestrating music
Inside my ears
Italian cuisine
Inside my mouth
Panics, paranoia
Inside my head
The American dream
Filled with fireworks
And potholes
Covered by band aids
In God we trust
Police
Sitting and smoking
At the saloon
Being available
For nothing
Losing goodwill
Every second
Every moment
Laying around
As fat house cats
What flawless
Behavior
We all rent
A fake life
And pretend
We aren't
Crashing
Their cars
Into a concrete lady

The rythmatic sequences of sound
Slithered through my brain
Leaving ***** of yarn
Tangled all around me
Caught between deception
And a ressurection
Becoming one with the water droplets
Stuck to the window
Visions fluttered through my mind
Like tiny little butterflies
Tickling the inside of my eyes
The greatness soothed me
To a point of fear
A good fear
Like that of a fierce man
With a sweet soul
That of a burdened child
With a perfect life
My wallet was empty
But my heart was full
Of sounds
And shapes
Like the little block toys
From my childhood
Nothing could stop this
This sentimental feeling
Not even the burning pictures
Falling from my pinstriped wall

I want to tell you something
but my lips are flicking sparks
like a lighter draining fluid
and I want to bombard you
with all my ragged knots
of truth but the words
are stuck in traffic
giving each other the finger
ramming bumper to bumper
so they can reach the nearest
exit and my nerves
are a rickety jalopy
almost flipping over
at the sight
of any speedbump
and I'm ripping
at the edges
like the pages
of a Lynch script
because
I want to tell you something

I wish i had a trillion;
But with this million,
I truly thank God.