I'm so good with words
Essays, presentations, and speeches
I can craft a sonnet and sell a watch
But when I see you
In all your blonde haired glory
My tongue sticks to the roof of my mouth like peanut butter
My heart pounds
As if you've put the bass on high
And those words, those beautiful words
That flowed like the water of Niagara falls
When it came to 5-7-5 and 4 score and seven years ago
Dry up.
My mind overloads with whether
I should spout out the first thing that comes to mind
Or try and catch you with my charm
But it doesn't matter because my mouth won't respond
Not until hours later when i'm home alone, and kicking myself for not saying a word
Then finally the dam bursts
And I know just what to say
I feel my lips move
They say hi, you're beautiful
And I love you
Words to woo a woman's heart
I'm so good with words
Essays, presentations and speeches

But not when it counts

Orange colored skies
Tales of burned empires
Days when party bosses were kings
In the era that Boss Tweed pulled the strings
I walk these city streets and each corner speaks volumes of history to me
But your street remains a mystery
Untouched and ivy grown
I hear the distant sounds of a trombone
Harlem calls to me to listen
Having never been there, i dont know what im missing
But i long for the days where jazz was the popular music
Back in the days of grand old acoustic
Bass, drums, piano, and trumpet
Cab Calloway, Count Basie and the beating of a drumstick
Im not certain i was born in the right age
But pondering ifs and or buts is the work of a sage
There is however one thing i know for sure
That in all of time and history, id like to be your cure

Your passion is beautiful
I see it in your words
They dance off the page, pirouette and adagio
But they also march off to do battle
Spear in hand
Your desire to do good and to help the world
Floats, off into the distance, like a melody atop the clouds
And when you're sad
Those words drag, heavily along the paper's edge
Each letter piercing my heart
You compose these words, these sentences
And you are composed of these words, these sentences
They are every fiber of your being
Your heart and your soul
Your words are passionate
Your words are beautiful

And so are you.

Im feeling horribly lonely tonight
No bottle of jack by my side
My friends have all left me
A victim of emotional thievery
Im feeling horribly lonely tonight

Grey. Uniformity.
Lack of personal expression.
I'm suffocating.
The weird way my hair parts
my half stride, half slump
I'm not allowed to be me.
We learn about other countries here,
the map color-codes them.
But we don't truly experience
their difference, their uniqueness.
To us they are a picture on a page,
a paragraph in a textbook.
They're not real.
Not like the dull sense of loathing,
that pounds in the back of my brain.
The sameness drives me mad.
Animalistic instincts take over,
and then nothing.

Grey.

He sits, tapping his foot
Eyes transfixed on the bright screen
His pupils dilate as he sees the green bubble with her name pop up
His pulse begins to quicken
Droplets of sweat trace his sideburns and his chiseled chin
Shaking and unsure his hand reaches for the green dot.
But he hesitates.
And in that instant the dot- his hope disappears
His moment of opportunity, gone before he could ****** it.

I seek your approval like a bear seeks honey.
But rather than sweet success
I am forced to swallow spoonful after spoonful of rejection.
The stinging feeling makes me want to gag.
Yet like a ******, I keep coming back for more.
Yearning for your comforting voice, that soothing high pitched melody.
But all I hear- is buzzing.

The bass amp in my room reminds me of you.
The buzzing, my sole comfort.
My fingers, swollen and bruised from endless hours of self pity.

The spot on my chest where you struck
Your sharp black dagger lodged between where I thought of you-
And where you thought I thought of you.

I gave you my all, and you flew and soared
Far, far away- majestic as ever.
Until I could barely make out those black and yellow stripes.

The Queen leaving her nest, leaving her workers
Abandoning her family for pastures greener
To fly out into the great unknown

I never did discover where you went.

But till this day- I still can't eat honey.

Leaves, with the crispness and color of a juicy gala apple.
They crunch beneath my feet, like a little boy embarassed at how loud is he chewing.
The wind whistles, as if he is a city fellow, gawking at a woman on the street.

But I, I am silent.

I take it all in, the sights, the sounds, even the smells.
That cool autumn air fills my lungs

Refreshing.

I turn the corner and feel my feet pick up the pace as they carry me down hill.

It's all gone downhill now, hasn't it?

Down from the soaring heights, the fancy dinner parties
Laughter and bottles of wine.
Well, the bottles of wine remain- but the laughter

The laughter is gone.

And all that remains is an empty bottle, and me.
I want to scream out, what went wrong?

But I, I am silent.

Lying here by the sea
The waves, crashing over me
I sigh, I sigh, a sign of relief
I breath in peace
Raise my head to meet the seagulls gaze
Flying high, flying free
Peacefully
They rest upon the pier
I join them, taking in the sights and sound I am at ease for once.
Objects bob, upon and down,
In rhythm with the ocean
They create a beat
That I am in tune with
It becomes part of me,
I am part of it
We are one
In this moment nothing else exists
Just myself and this place.
And for that moment I am happy.
No worries, no concerns.
Just glad to be.
I want to keep the feeling, lock it up, save it for a rainy day.
But it is fleeting, it shan't remain, i must salvage it, in my memory, my
bones.
I come to see this release, to live in the moment I lie in the grass, fall
asleep and dream, happy dreams, magical places, then nothing.

11/11/11
Your dream come true
You wish for one thing
Well I wish for you
Staring up at the sky
Admiring the stars
I wonder if it's worth it
And if I'll go far

Will I crash and burn?
Like a comet in the sky?
Or will I soar, like an eagle flying by?

Striving to be the best
And reach the highest of highs
Will I let my opportunity just pass me by?
Or will I seize it by the horns and real It in?

So many questions
So little time
Whats yours is yours and what's mine is mine.

What to wish for, I wish I really knew.
To wish for the day, that i'll never rue.
A day were i'm happy, smiling and glad
Instead of frowning, stomping and mad.

I wish for that day, please let it come soon
Meanwhile i'm here, just laying in my room.

Generation Y
Nothing to ***** about
We've gotta a good life, no reason to complain
So we moan and groan, blow things out of proportion
We gives ourselves a reason to complain, ***** ourselves up.
But where does it get us? Nowhere.
We should be making something of ourselves, working hard so we have a future
Not wrecking it with stupid decisions
Drinking isn't so great, it can wait
*** is overrated you don't want to get someone late  
Drugs are for those who instigate
Violence and partying will ******* up
Mind over matter
Angst will make you even sadder
But who cares about a lost cause
When a country is going down the drain
and its people are in financial pain
But all we care about is a handsome doctor who walks around with a  ******* cane.

If the world ends on Friday, I'd like you to know
You really are lovely, much more lovely than a hobo
Your hair is cooler than Ramona Flowers
Your style of dress, not nearly retro chic
But every time you speak, its more eloquent than Louis Phillipe.
Your music taste-divine
Not even Athena could match
I really do think you are quite a catch.
If the world ends on Friday, which I really do doubt
I'd like to spend that day, or some other, with you.

I feel like screaming at the top of my lungs.
"AHHHHHHHHHHH!"
She intoxicates my thoughts,
I can almost smell her sweet scent.
Fresh laundry which I adore,
And I begin to wish I could hug her once more. 
Feel her smooth skin, her soft fleeces.
But it’s not meant to be.
For she doesn’t think of me, 
in the way I think of her -

Often. 

Just the thought of her makes my heart race
When I’m around her, my ears flush scarlet.
But it’s not meant to be.
Late nights and endless conversations.
When things were new, 
when they were fresh.
Discovering each other
watching a friendship grow.
Then overnight, like turning out the light,
Having it grow into more than friendship.
But it’s not meant to be.
The sleepless nights,
the doubts and frights.
Wishing I could change things beyond my control.
But it was not meant to be.

Cuz. 

She’ll never be my girl.

For all your imperfections.
Because they are what make you, you.
For the way your laugh sounds, though you may hate it, I think it's cute.
For the way you never fail to make me smile. 
Let me hold you close and whisper sweet nothings into your ear.
So I can show you the magic behind my eyes, my imagination, my inspiration. 
So I can make you smile that beautiful smile, that's as unique as you are and as beautiful too.
So I can smell that endearing smell, fresh laundry which I so adore.
To squeeze you, just hard enough to let you know I care. 
And when I release you, wishing to hold you once again and never let go.
But knowing not to, for like all beautiful things, you are fragile. 
Wishing I could just make all that sadness go away, and knowing despite how hard I try I won't be able to, but still trying. 
Closing the door to you in my mind, I sit. To rest for a moment.
I think, if only, if only. 
And I want to scream out:
For ****'s sake, just let me love you.