By Me, the Great Duncan

Fickle and ever indecisive,
Destiny such a mistress
Taunting at my soul,
Yet,
When it shines in your favor,
Such a shine, shimmering with your jubilation for everyone to see

Hopeing was now a tired act,
Always the same night, same time,
Deep in sleep wanting nothing more,
Than to wake to someone,
Anyone to just ease this,
This tragic ironic loneliness I had put myself in

"Why?!" I screamed to the heavens of my dark ceiling,
Calling a question that mockingly,
Never was answered,
Yet

No more,
Live,
I whisper to the glass and grass,
Flowing and burning,
Mimicking the nights,
Speeding by,
Blurs on a deserted and dark, desolated highway, thumbing my way down,
Trying, searching,
For the tell tale signs of destiny,
Shimmering on the horizon,
Till,

Finally, in a bar,
"Let the night begin!" We yell as we begin our hunt,
Laughing, yet always on the scout,
Never seeing her,
Passing oh so close,
Almost!
The clock ticked down,
Closer and closer as Destiny,
That fickle mistress of my nightmares,
As deemed fit,
I met her tonight,
For all my cries in the night,
For all my past failures,
For all the ones lost,
I would find the one,
I've been asking for,
But only just,
As the clock,
Ticks,
Down,
Ever,
Closer,
Till...

She smiles sweetly,
I see her, only her,
The rest is blurred,
Distorted in the wake,
Of the beauty,
Radiating,
Only for me

Another smile,
From on high,
Destiny laughs,
We embrace,
A sigh,
Happily,
My question answered,
"Why?!" I had screamed,
Her,
Destiny answered

Dear friends
Loved ones,
rivals of all sorts
pass by me in a river,
of pain and pleasure

On this bench,
by this beach,
watching the sun
dip slowly
highlighting my years
as I close my eyes
tears
down my face
and a Grin

The moments found,
the feelings felt,
the hearts broken,
all fresh wounds now,
old scars
just another lifetime now

Feeling the shivering,
melting,
pleasure of your touch again,
all of you
lost shadows,
still here now with me,
like you once were
like you once did

Nothing more now,
I murmur in the fading light,
save the embrace,
of one I lost so long ago
I know him when he calls,
Fierce and Loyal,
even through death

Not long now,
I whisper,
through the tears
Yet,
a smile still remains,
like the light of the sun
still reflecting in the moon,
like the lives
Ive lived,
ready to do it all again

I sit in the center of a bright lit room
screaming at you,
You sit and stare
never flinching,
Your smile,
Consumes me,
I reach out
Screaming,
I reach out
Nothing

I sit here now
In this room which holds my being,
Hearing nothing but the flutter of wicked love,
and the caress of poisoned promises
"Cant you see me?!" I cry,
the echo of your lies
in the absence of your heart answers for you

The light is dim now
fading from sight,
You
Fading from light,
Me
Here I sit,
no longer screaming,
no longer bleeding for your touch
no longer suffering for your passing glance
no longer...

The light bulb shatters,
See nothing but the dark where it all began
Finally Seeing that you no longer matter,
an empty socket,
Waiting to be filled again

Can you forgive
Can you forget
Can you look past,

all my faults
all my failures
all my regrets that I have in life,

Could you see it in your heart,
your soul
to forgive someone
who cant forgive himself,
a man who regrets much,
who thinks of the past,
as the present

The pain
of your passing
still
flows through my mind
without check
and the nights
sometimes
never end

Guilt
wells inside me
filling my heart with black
crude
remorse
dripping into my psyche
draining my will,
wanting nothing but you

If only you could forgive,
a man like me
who still cries in dark
wishing for just one more day
to see
just one more
then maybe
I could forgive myself

The night is heavy now,
sitting in thick of it all

My tears staining my face,
where the smile used to sit

Nothing now,
save for the throbbing of my heart
broken, yet still
counting the seconds
with each beat

Here I lie
wanting nothing
but to pass on
either in sleep or life
as darkness,
eternal,
creeps in my mind once more

I feel weak now,
lost within the abyss of my mind
withering in the dark,
imprisoned by tears

Yet

Hope filters through,
like the rays of the coming sun,
the morrow brings with it light
brings with it
Dawn

Tonight
I write
these feelings of pride
Honor,
Courage,
Sadness,
Worry,
Pride
&
Love

Here we salute you
to your endeavors,
to your dreams,
to your friendship,
that will be here
long after the war is over,
long after the dead are buried
long after you've,

gone

To you,
Mother

I write this world,
to show it
just how amazing you are
Mother

Through out my dark times,
through out my strife
my failures
Mother

You have been the,
only
one
Mother
Who could help me forget,
and brighten my being

Mother
with compassion
with love
with something only
You can
and will ever do
and not a Soul on this earth
or above
can ever take that from me

Mother

When They Came,
the neighbors left with them

When They Came,
the city shut down

When They Came,
the world died...

and came back,
hungry

They Came,
I stayed

They Came,
I hid

They Came,
shattering my world

They Came,
and took my humanity

I Left,
my belongings and home

I Left,
my friends and family

I Left,
and fell in line

I Left
now I march with Them

Forever,
Till I Die again

This tune,
this melody,
this horror in front of me

Plays like a sick tune,
of sickness and disease

The key winds around,
the picks play their death cry
over
and over
again

It haunts my dreams
playing as your face
locks my soul
into a dance of death with your heart

Over and Over again
you play
through my head
pounding the beat,
snapping the strings,
flaying the chords,
bleeding the Harmony

Years this went on,
the dance of my heart
Slogging through the tears,
as you always bow away
spinning through the music,
cutting my veins
succumbing to this haunting
Music

Centered in the sky,
above the our waltz
sits the centerpiece of our dance,
a grand chandelier,
adorned in silk and diamonds,
sparkling above us,
showing the times we should have had
could have...

Yet here we dance,
forever the Music echoing,
deep
in my Heart

I Rove for you,
My love

I Rove searching always
My love

Every drink,
every song I play,
every swish of my cane,
always to find you

My love,

Im a Rover,
always roving,
searching,
for you,
My love

You may not know me,
or know of my quest
Nor do I know of you
except for your beauty
your grace,
your pull
My love

We will be together,
one day
but here I Rove,
through the dark,
the dank,
the evil of this land,
I Travel
I Quest
I Search
My Love

I Rove
to gain my true loves company

When I was 16
My heart was broken
and I felt like I never
ever
love again

the pain was intense
dragging me down...
killing me...

**** that
LAUGH

let the past be the past
LAUGH

if you feel like **** from some text
call
fb message
or what have you

LAUGH

things wont get better
so **** it

LAUGH

make those people see
that the past is something
you only read in textbooks

LAUGH

at them all

LAUGH

at the mistakes

LAUGH!!!!!!

at everything

The past is the past
and will forever
ever
be that way

Dont let that girl bring you down
dont let that text ruin your day
dont let that ******* who picked on you
get the last laugh

LAUGH

make them see how crazy you are
let them think of you
let them see you happy
let them laugh with you

LAUGH

then when that girl is next to you
that text youve been waiting for
the laughter dies
life will be
better

I know of this man,
such a man is he,
takes the world that is given,
and smashes it to the ground

I know of this child,
who fights for his independence,
when received,
though,
he cries out for company

I know of this human,
who acts like he belongs,
striving for acceptance,
yet,
pushes those away without knowing

This Man
This Child
This Human

He is perfect yet stumbles with every step,
he shouts his views from the rooftops, yet hides when confronted
he longs for love, yet smothers the seed before it can grow

You may know this Man, Child, Human
You may have seen his mistakes,
seen his wrong doings,
seen his failure

I see it

I see his suffering,
his denial,
his long for something more in life than life
he wishes for a call,
a message,
a note

From anyone, anything, anywhere,
to show him,
to prove to him,

That it will be alright,
in The End

So we talked,
writing our feelings

Slowly bonding,
innocently

I became intrigued,
you were too good to be true

I grew to think of you,
more and more
and
more

Seeing you,
meeting you,
thinking of
you

You came close,
closer
closest

on me now

A frenzy,
of thoughts,
flowing

As your hair drowns me;
Ive never felt more glorious

Still we move closer,
my thoughts; a raging torrent of passion and worry

I act,
without thinking
accepting,
this

After; is silent and still
my mind reeling from the ride
my body tingling with each breath

Yet...
I feel like this moment
such a moment it was,
is fleeting;
flowing away

I sit here...
I think here...
I remain here...

Without you

Ive lost track of time,
the hours slip by

for near an eternity,
there as been no sign...

Of movement

The Thing is...

Zounds! It stirs!

Crawling, pushing, squirming;
it disgusts me

I feel my mind race,
muscles tense,

Weapons at the ready...

I attack!

The beast retreats,
as I strike

Coward...
I think to myself
crouching down once more

Yet it puzzles me
whenever The Thing and I met

He always hides...
Under my masters Feet

A quiet night,
a windy night,
a night...

for battle

I stalk the corners,
scan the windows,
watching...

for battle

My keeper sleeps,
safe in his dreams,
confident...

he will survive the night

A sound...

Zounds!
A foe in the dark!
He attacks!

Dodge! Jump! Roll!

We tumble and grapple,
my master wakes!

A light stuns my foe,
I deal the killing blow,
he stood no chance...

This string shall hurt my master no more!

Just so you know
you know,
Im here

Just so you know,
I know,
Youre not there

Hey,
Cant you tell me why,
I cant be there

You know,
I know,
That you want me there

I dont care if they
you
him
she minds

I can be there

Even though,
I know,
You don't want me there

If you should cry,
I know,
Ill still be there

Even if,
You dont know,
Ill be there for you

Let it be known
from far and wide

you dont **** with me
No matter what

I keep my mouth closed
to save you
from all this Spray

So first of all
**** all of you

Goto hell
**** a ****
and
well just ******* die

Im not going to sit here
and let you think you know me

Im here to live my life
get in my way
find out why nobody ****** with me

Takes a lot to **** me off now
buttons dusty with out pushing
but now your slamming it
trying to get a rise

youll regret it

This is a warning to you
yea you

You know who you are,
you know what you did

now you released something
something that was sleeping
something that shouldnt have woken

You wanted this,
Never thinking,
Now I've been thinking,
Its time for Duncan to rise again

No more pushing me around

*******

No more letting myself get hurt
by slimeballs and ****** like you

*******

Here I am,
take your shot

*******

Here this Spray ends
all for you to criticize
to talk about behind my back
well heres a message for all you

Dont **** with me
And dont let my silence make me seem small,
Nothings more dangerous than a man in a corner
Ive told you time and time again

*******

4 Muses,
Four Victories,
IV Failures,

Number 1, innocent I was
Taking me in,
Using me
Number I, The Fall of Innocence
You took me to the edge
You were thought to be
One
Yet you fall instead me,
Down the crack you created just for me

Number Two, eager for something more
something to take,
and give
Number 2, The Direction of Heart
You taught me the way
You might have been
One
Yet we part broken,
Yours will last a lifetime

Number 3, lust and lies
pushing for less,
needing more
Number III, The Self Destruction
You got what you deserved
So glad your not
One
You left with poison,
and no antidote exists

Number IV, realization of self
seeing my flaws,
in your deception
Number Four, The Anti Self
You lifted and let me fall,
Never again thinking you,
One
You taught more than you know,
and now sulk in your misery

Four of you entered my life
3 left for good, I stays for observation from the clouds
More lay in front of me,
some close
some far
Nothing more to do
than wait for my next Muse

I, buy the tickets
We, enter together

You, find the seats
Us, alone together

The previews start
I hold your hand

The hero finds his girl.
You hold me closer

The hero falls
My lips to yours

He, the hero, rises
She, the girl, squeezes my hand
I, smile
Happy in the dark

If only till the lights come on