I stare at the paper for hours
But I see no words
Only scratches of something supposedly informative.

Where I live, nothing seems to matter
The wind comes from the deep, dark thoughts floating by
At speeds that I always seem to catch up to

I see their mouths stuck in expressions of emotion
As I begin to venture into the vast, torturous wasteland
That is my mind.

The people around me seem to freeze
Fading into dull, lifeless objects
As I transcend out of normality

No clouds, no sun, nothing is required of me
I feel safe inside of my mind
Where my thoughts and me become one

I am important in this dream realm
I matter to someone...
She exists only in here.

Even though I do not matter to myself
I matter to her
And she keeps me from slipping away

If only she could come with me when I leave...
I would be a better person
And maybe, for once in this life, I could be worthwhile.

The whiteness fades,
My body begins to reappear and touches the ground once more
I try to avoid eye contact with everyone around me

Why do they make fun of what they think they know?
I don't want to let them in...
So I don't.

it lurks in a whisper
in the biting of cold breeze
it is tauntingly hollow
and fills me with unease

creeping, crawling, undetected
because of it's sly nature
sometimes i can make it go,
but it only comes back later

voices screaming in my head
"you're nothing" and it's true...
you'll never ever understand
because it hasn't happened to you

it will not be much longer
i soon will be at ease
but the stinging pain will persevere
in the biting of cold breeze.

Such a short while, I knew her...
I had never before known that such beauty could walk upon this earth
She was my angel. She was my hero. She...
Was my all.
My entire life revolved around her. I knew that without her,
The shell in which my ghost resided in would collapse.
And it did.
The driver did not see, not did he care that with one jolt,
That one glitch in the otherwise mundane routine of a selfish, soulless truck driver;
That one mistake...
Could in the same moment take a life, and continue on with the uncaring attitude one would have
Driving over a pothole in the road.
Instantly, two spirits were released from their earthly home,
Hers, and then mine.
Two hearts, entwined,
Enraptured in the way they were meant to be...
One love.
The autopsy revealed what, to this day,
They still do not understand.
The heart in my husk had imploded, flattened (upon impact..?)
Precisely at the time she was taken away from me.
After examining our two bodies thoroughly, the doctor's words were nil.

They will never understand the true meaning of love
For they know not what it means to be loved
Like we were.

She is beautiful.
She has deep, haunting eyes
That pierce into the depths of my being
That perceive the pain I've toiled and striven to bury
In the dark recesses of my inner core.
She understands me because
She, too harbors
Despicable secrets.