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Lesa Renee Dec 2015
We should be meeting in the middle
It should be like that all the time
But sometimes it hurts more than a little
When the darkness obscures the line
It's a sinking feeling
When all we're doing is clinging to the floor
Lowest of the low
Like there's no fight in me left to fight for
You can only go down so deep
Before you have to come up for air
Now I lay me down to sleep
Whenever I wake I hope you'll be there
"It's You, It's You
It's all for you,
Everything I do..."
Lesa Renee Dec 2015
True love breaks your heart into pieces like nothing else.
"It's You, It's You
It's all for you,
Everything I do..."
Lesa Renee Dec 2015
Where are you
I keep looking for you
Even as you tell me "we'll make it through"
I want to believe you like I always do
In this bed as I lie
Strangled by the sheets and the darkness in my eyes
Feeling like I could die
(Sweet relief, such sweet release)
Waiting for you
Watching for you
Wishing I would find you if I looked behind me
But I'm still waiting
"In this bed of spider webs
I think of ways to change myself"
Through these long, dark nights
Alone despite living together
Walking with the same painful limp
Parched lips
All skin and bone
Starving for a little glimpse
of the day you'll finally find your way home
"It's You, It's You
It's all for you,
Everything I do..."
Lesa Renee Nov 2015
"Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of withering, of tarnishing."

- anais nin.
"It's You, It's You,
It's all for you,
Everything I do..."
  Nov 2015 Lesa Renee
L
listen, there's a fire deep inside the places so unknown
where the orphans and the rejects found a place to call their home
and it's crumbling to the ground
watch now, loners and their lovers must avoid the flames below
while they hold their breath and hands and disappear into the smoke
and they're fading quick, like ghosts
nothing looks the way it should and footprints trail across the street
dragging soot and ash and sorrow on the bottoms of their feet
someone smells of gasoline

there's a flood within the mothership and no one inside swims
noses struggle and make bubbles and their lungs can't seem to win
water overwhelms and drowns
memories of a brighter moment thrown aside by crashing waves
someone used to love the ocean and the salty sunny days
oh my, how things have changed

nothing was the same

you look down at your hands and notice drops of gasoline
you'd think the smell would wash away like water you released
your home was trying to grow legs and longed to finally be free
your only happy healthy hideaway was so far out of reach

you had no choice
but to **** and drown and hurt
you had no choice
you watched the home you just built burn

something about destruction pulls you close and draws you in
losing everything you've known before it leaves just means you win
nothing's changed, you've always been this way
lighting matches, digging your own shallow grave
Lesa Renee Nov 2015
She said, "You will always be too much of something for someone: too big, too loud, too soft, too edgy. If you round out your edges, you lose your edge."
Sounds so easy to "just do YOU" to someone on the outside.
She told me to be careful, but not fearful.
She told me to be mindful, but not thoughtless.
She thinks I really know how to live, even when I feel like dying.
And now I feel forced into change, because if I don't, it means I'm not trying.

I loathe Tuesdays.
"Its You, It's You,
It's all for you,
Everything I do..."
Lesa Renee Nov 2015
How can this last forever when forever hurts so much?
"Its You, It's You,
It's all for you,
Everything I do..."
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