When people say
"I'm not out of the woods yet"
It means they're still not healed
Still tangled
Still mangled
Amongst the trees and branches
Roots tripping them up
Pine needles in their hair
Trying to clear a path to escape
Darkness
Blurred stares
Is it an accident that you ventured in?
Was it curiosity that led you out the door?
Circumstances beyond your control?
Or do you continue to amble aimlessly
down the same path of treachery you walked before?
When leaving a trail of breadcrumbs only leads you back to your past
Wouldn't you rather be lost than home safely this time?
Do you heed those warnings and beware of the Big Bad Wolf in the woods?
Do you betray all that is in your head and your heart?
Or do you do as you should?

"My heart is a tomb
My heart is an empty room
I’ve given it away
I never want to see it again

And all your words could save me
But keep your love away from me..."

- Chelsea Wolfe

I settled in
And I settled with it
I had logic when I drifted off
But an entirely different shadow casts its cruel light this morning
As I rise and realize
The Silence
The Unknown
The taste of limerent panic
Devours everything in its path
And in its wake
Like a flood
I had logic when I drifted off
Logic when we last spoke
Logic when we kissed with hope
And now
My mind is crawling
with the worst possibilities
Triggered
and riddled with evil trickery
My eyes are open too wide
Searching in this vicious darkness
For you
Like wind through the trees
I'm left breathless in the breeze
Unsettled and sleepless
Weak in the knees
It's always this way on nights like these

The light leaves my eyes
in the wake of silence
Yet, the noise in my ears
is deafening
The pounding of my heavy heart
Defiant
Covert punishment
Tired of being tested
of being tempted
of being bested
So tired
But sleep won't come tonight
Not without a fight
I'll watch the hours pass instead
with unfeeling eyes
from an empty bed
while my need for resolve is slowly swept beneath forced phrases
Empty gazes
Frozen faces
Like thousands of silent, crawling insects
My mind and my body are restless
This is the sound of
refusal to accept
the denial
and the disconnect

I cannot help but channel you when we are apart, as this Love has become my very energy
I bide my time and visualize the movements we make, the way our bodies embrace and entwine with such fluidity
I cannot imagine a break in our ever growing bonds, our sameness, our connection, our continuity
I see you now in moments captured, in tiny time capsules, held in precious hands like fragile shells of destiny
I long for every moment in which we plan and build and give ourselves over to our bliss, our own Heaven
Our Eternity

There are ways in which the world
can turn things into distant memories
Broken hearts
Dreams torn apart
Worn out pages from weary stories
But our connection continues to deepen
even as the world outside tries to seep in
We don't just go through the paces
Instead we visit all new places
Bathed in this Love
in this light
even on the darkest, coldest night
I stay warm in your arms
In your embrace
and wait for the next moment
when my eyes will adore your face

The darkest eyes and darker hours
Kisses from your lips devoured
You grant me the glow from your crimson light
and name me your Goddess every night
I find myself dreaming and drowning in you
pillows still warm from your body and blankets scented by two
The feeling of your arms and sweet affection
In this room,
Surrounded by you in every direction
This unmade bed where we share our desires
Where our passion burns and our love aspires
Dimmed lights and candles because my lover remembers,
My hair across your pillow,
where my dreams are smoldering embers
This is no longer a foreign place
Your bed feels like home in a different space
Delicate breathing, ambient songs
Your bed is a haven where I feel I belong