Why do I run from you?
And not to you?
Like a helpless newborn
I want the comfort of Your arms
But I find myself acting
like a confident, self-sufficient soul

Lord, please forgive me for such foolishness

I admit I cannot live without You
That I am more scared than I am brave
In my utter weaknesses, I know I stand defenseless
Because there are many battles to be won
And my life feels ragged and war-torn from the conflicts

So, Lord, I embrace you once again
As your precious child
Calling you Abba Father
Our earthly fathers may forsake us
and fail us shamefully
But I am forever grateful
that You love me forever
and that You have made me

Yours

If poems can heal
Let mine reach the skies
As a prayer on the wings of a dove

I wish my words to be honest
And not just nice sounding or trite
I want them to have medicinal merit

Not just do I wish
That they would help me to feel better
But that they help another who is hurting

I feel like a puzzle with missing pieces
I don't know when I ever felt whole
Perhaps I was the day I was born, but I'll never know

But now my life seems fragmented
Like a puzzle that is in many pieces
And I cannot find the missing parts

I have been slowly reconstructing it all back together
Sometimes, nothing seems to fit any way I try
And, in my rage and sadness, I find myself wanting and lacking

Perhaps,  none of us are meant to be whole
But our lives are filled with "holes" instead
So we know we need to rely on others

Relying on others so we are humbled
That we don't have it all together
And in our need, we shall reach out

In that way, my brokenness is a blessing
For it bannishes my foolish pride
And lets me know I am only human

It lets me know I need God
I am but a part of a bigger picture
Even if I do not have all the answers I want

What gets me through
is seeing You in my view
Not love of man, fleeting
But You keep my heart beating

While the world has its sorrows
Poets write of brighter tomorrows
Are we so naive
in that we believe?

My brother took his own life
Acquainted with inner strife
But, as a sword, I'll take up my pen
Knowing my life is in God's hands

The past exists no more
Yet it hangs about like a ghost
Often haunting us with regret
We want to right the wrongs
We want another chance
to do things over
that truly trouble us
but we are powerless
to its demands

The present is this very moment
And it must compete
with the apparitions of yesterday
that crowd into our thinking,
like smoke and mirrors,
and rob us of this precious instant
of time that we truly have right now

The future is an unknown horizon
Yet we either look forward to it
with great expectations
or worry ourselves into thinking
that it will overwhelm us
or that it will disappoint us  
It is not ours yet to possess
Yet like the ghosts of the past
it has no business
taking hostage of our thoughts
We want to have control of it
when it is not anywhere in reach

I want to write a poem
but the words escape me
Is there anything new
under the sun?

I've written about
Love
Pain
Depression
Anger
Death
God
Evil
Light
Hope
Nature­
and so on

I don't want to sound redundant
I don't want to regurgitate the same thing
I fear I might be a broken record

So I wait patiently for some more inspiration

I want to write a poem
but the words escape me
Is there anything new
under the sun?

Your life for a friend
Putting everything at stake
Reflecting God's love