I only show the best me. The me that you should see. I **** it in and smile alot so you can't see too deep..I laugh and joke and smile and goad..project normality...but Im not me the me u see I hide behind the scenes..for if you saw the me I am I'm sure you'd disagree..I am not her the her you know I am the me thats me.

It is easier to be distracted than consumed by thinking.....

When you float below the water just inches from the surface..suffocating in this vast ocean of thoughts.
You see life above but cannot reach it..you are anchored to the bottom no hope of rescue..
The blurred light of the sun u see and feel on ur face...teasing and taunting you when theres no hope of escape.
On the cusp of life and death inches from the surface to gasp a saving breath.....

Lips are red wine tinted..
Mind is hazed with moral thinking..
The ultimate anomaly that is me..
I fade behide society.
I never reach for normality
I am the me that I must be.
No conform that I must seek..
I dont need u to question me!

Elusive thoughts of you flit between my consious and subconcious mind.
Flashes of happiness and pain like static tingling through fiber in the dark.
You are always hiding there in the background of my mind.
In my chest of memories, filled with muddled chaos, the lid remains agape.
No way to keep you locked within you roam without constraints.
You creep into my dreams sometimes, to walk a perpetual path.
Your dominance relinquished now,its love that lures me back.
Drawn to you instinctively, as a lion still untamed.
Drawn to that which hurt me, like a moth onto a flame