Oh, the pain, the assault On my nose The bitter humiliation The gall of life's existence Devoid of meaning, Save pain The horrible squishing between My toes
Howls in the night Keep sweet Morpheus at bay Some things just aren't right That ******* cat is having his way With the Neighbor's chihuahua again STUPID CAT! Rats are for EATING, not for making love!
My new best friend has perished Though I only met him last night His company was cherished That **** cat knocked him down And then drank the spilled bourbon Now I am bereft of my solace With only the empy bottle, and I maintain that if Coolidge were still president This would never have happened.
Ah, youth, were hast thou fled? It seems to me only yesterday that I was dodging the draft in WWII. Where was I? Oh, yeah. Someone's buggered off with My false teeth. It's that f*cking cat again.