The worst part
Perhaps the hardest thing
Living in junction with another
Is the part
The time, the realizing
You aren't just self destructive; but her...
Too

Hear the darkness
In the rain
Or the cloud covered moon
Hear the Violence
In the silence
Of a still dead room
Hear the clamor
Of an army
As you sit, silent, pondering
Here the turmoil
Of a heart
In the forest wandering

Listening to unknown tunes
Then the sickening guilt consumes
I'm pathetic, I'm ordinary
I can promise I am not very
Good at this, in fact I ****
Addiction's vile, I just feel stuck
You beat yours, why can't I beat mine
It's always haunting all the time

Sometimes, I still feel
As if I am in need of
A friend close by me

Secret messages I did hide
In numerous places, inside
Little notes and pads and books
Awaiting for her loving looks
To see them there in my own hand
Secret messages that I planned

Hark! the ghoul that's over there!
Hark! the image does so tear,
The heart and mind, a sight so gruesome
What I would not give to view some
Lovely sight with these sad eyes
A beautiful sight should be my prize
But here I sit and here I stare
At the gruesome ghoul over there

Can I just die?
I'm sick of this ******* ******* heart
And this ******* head
I need to get out
Be better off dead