nobody has ever told me that i'm beautiful so many times that it repeats itself over and over again in my head. nobody has ever loved me so much, that everything in the world is suddenly better, and it seems as if the sun rises and sets just for me. nobody has ever wanted to kiss me, or even hold my hand.

but you do.

and i couldn't be happier.

d.l.b.

you said nothing was going to change.
but so much already has.
you don't see it,
but i do.

i'm sitting on the floor of my bathroom as i write this.
i looked in the mirror and i saw it all.
i saw the sadness,
and i saw the despair.

i wish things could go back to the way they were.
but that's awfully selfish of me.
i miss you.
and i know it won't be long until i never see you again.

d.l.b.

i wish i could walk to you,
so that you could see me in person,
so you could see how much this is hurting me.
i wish that you could feel my pain,
just for a moment,
so you could miss me too.

d.l.b.

you were brought back into my mind tonight.
and it made me realize just how very much i am missing you.
i see bits of you everywhere i go.
there's a boy in my math class with your same name.
your name.
it's all i think of nowadays.
it repeats throughout my brain.
5 words.
2 syllables.
over and over again.
reminding me of how much i miss you.

d.l.b.

i want to be reminded that you're here,
and you will never leave me.
because after the last boy,
i don't know who I can trust.

d.l.b.

i feel as though
my lungs are being drowned in my own sorrow.
and my feet are being held down by 20 pound rocks.
and i feel as though
you're standing there watching me
as i struggle to get by.
and you don't feel any remorse at all.

d.l.b.

school used to be a safe, warm, and welcoming place.
now it's full of liars, cheaters, and back-stabbers.
what happened to what used to be?

d.l.b.