Light is returning,
to my mental sky,
Light is returning,
as with the sun.
The storm is passing,
my mind is lightening.
The burden will never be gone,
but it is lessening.
The sun is shining,
and for once I smile.
The warmth spreads to my feet,
it soothes my soul,
as it hasn't in months.
Call me crazy,
call me high,
neither am I,
I'm just happy.
Happy for the light.
Happy for them.
Happy for those I call my family.
Happy for my family of friends.

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry all I can do is sit around playing love songs on guitar.

I’m sorry all I do is waste away.

I’m sorry i want to be too drunk or high to know whats going on all the time.

I’m sorry my existence is one of love and hate.

I’m sorry that I have hurt you, all of you.  

I’m sorry I can’t make up my mind between you three.

I’m sorry that I make it ******* you three.

I’m sorry for relying on you to keep me alive.

I’m sorry that you might cry reading this.

I’m sorry that I always want to die.

This isn’t how it should be.

Maybe in another life.

Maybe then.

Maybe we can love like we were meant to.

Maybe it won’t happen.

Maybe he won’t take you away.

Maybe you won’t pick him over me.

Maybe you won’t run from me.

Maybe.

But knowing my luck, then I’ll be the one to choose.

Between all of you.

My lifeholders.

My loves.

Why'd she do it,
why'd she choose?
The exact same,
as the one who came before?
Why'd she choose,
the other ?
Not me,
no never.
Not me,
not ever.
Always the other.
The better.
Cause everyone is better
than little old Derek.

I have a bottle of pills,

itd be easy as pie,

to slip too many,

into my mouth,

and slip into void.

What's stopping me?

I don't know.

Maybe I will.  Maybe I wont.

Tomorrow will tell the story.

I am a spark,
I ignite a flame,
The flame of thought,
Which is needed so dearly,
But these days are grim,
hardly a coal in sight,
For many I try to light,
are made of damp straw.

I'm outside,
Away from you,
Staying here,
Unable to move.
"She hates you,"
Whispers the rain,
"I know,"
I murmur back.
When will the sun shine?
Why does the world fight me?
All I want is her.

From the highest high,
to the lowest low,
you follow me loyally,
but I don't know where to go.