just inside the door
he gasps for air
laboring, I think, not to hold on
but to let go
his heaving, quickened shortness of breath
disheartening
each movement a moment in pain
his wizened face and body
recognizable
but so very hard to witness
the family is stronger than me

just inside the door
his mother and daughter
holding his hands
to give him whatever peace they can
not a comforting for themselves, but for him
one he can sense and feel and know

just outside the door
we wait with other waiters
groups of other families congregating
visiting and supporting loved ones
but mostly waiting
as death seems not impatient

just outside the door
people are talking and laughing
little children are playing
life goes on
as we hold back the tears

just inside the door
there is no hope for recovery
his cancer incurable
his suffering long

just inside the door
a drug induced peace
a restlessness
as hearts are kept waiting
to bid a final farewell

candles are burning
in vigilence and reverence
as beads are counted
measuring remaining days
with hopes of eternal life

alone in the dark
feeling the infiltration
porch lights and lamp posts
softly glowing through curtains
stealing onto the ceiling

robbing me of sleep
streaming, churning mindlessness
a holding pattern
clenched fists grasping on to night
keeping tomorrow at bay

melancholy muse
peering into my blue heart
softly whispering
songs of beautiful sadness
poetry written on sleeves

familial fractal
mitochondrial pieces of self-similarity
irregular patterns of DNA
each piece clearly resembling the whole
mirroring mirrors
an illness in the matriarchy
reflecting on each member
rippling and radiating
in family circular airwaves
time disrupted
suspended in hope
souls standing still
so quiet you can hear a heartbeat

thoughts, prayers and well wishes
pouring out to fill in the gaps
of uncertainty
pillars of strength in my weakness
as I drown myself in caloric comfort
I’m not too good with life and death
haven’t had much practice
we’ve been lucky

energy’s vibrations
the universe’s common thread
everything is part of everything
each person a contributor to the whole of society
each person contributing to the soul of the individual
psychologically, spiritually, physiologically
we affect each other in ways
not immediately apparent
truly, everyone is part of everyone
connected in oneness
your outpouring of kindness reminds me of that

poetry is heart speaking
her deepest wisdom
or lightest whimsy
traditional form or free verse
let souls sing
sprinkle metaphor and simile
if you are a poet, write like one
words are music
let them breeze like a melody
color with mix-matched sensory
don’t stay inside the lines
see sounds with eyes closed
hear flickering of fireflies’ light
smell beauty in distant mountains
taste majesty of flowers’ bloom
touch forgiveness
bring personification to life
“she” is much sweeter than “it”
and a seat cushion may have a roundness to her
throw in some high speech
make someone grab a lexicon
delete those extra words
‘I’s and ‘the’s especially
alliteration can create cacophonic chorus
while similar sounds of assonance
tie hoards and scores of words together
although there are no rules
try your best to use poetry’s tools
with this above all else:
let your truth ring
let your insights and revelations
be a healing to self and reader
let experiences resonate in hearts
and harmonize voices

self doubt and questions
in an introspective mood
turning life inward
"Do the things I do matter?"
"Am I making a difference?"

the sun still rises
with the moon taking her turn
the seasons cycle
Winter waits for Spring's rebirth
Summer strolls till Fall's harvest

the world in His hands
in a plan to be trusted
yet life is our own
we're each in charge of ourselves
responsibility's choice

questions disappear
when I look at the children
reading their faces
discovering who they are
searching for identity

a compass points North
but life happens everywhere
guidance is needed
helping hands to push or ****
as each living map unfolds