I feel the pillow’s coolness
As I fall asleep every night,
A smile forms from ear to
Ear as I begin to drift away.

I begin to levitate off my bed
With every breath I take and
The smile grows bigger and
A sigh slips through my lips.

My eyes begin to swell and
Tears fall down my cheeks
And I can’t believe what I’m
Seeing with own two eyes.

I feel warmth in my heart as
I see a Caterpillar of beautiful
Colors and she comes towards
Me ever so slowly inch by inch.

I stare into her beautiful eyes
And I feel the warmth spreads
To my entire body, and seeing
Her warms my body and soul.

With every beat of my heart,
The warmth drowns me and
I sweat beads of an emotion
That I’ve never felt before.

As I begin to walk towards her,
She disappears before I had the
Chance to talk to her and tell
Her that she’s the most prettiest

Caterpillar I’ve seen in my life,
That I can stare into her eyes
Forever, hear her laugh forever,
And get lost in her personality.

Floating higher in to the clouds,
I see a cocoon shimmering in the
Sun and I wish I could’ve talked
To her but I know that in the end,

She will emerge into a beautiful
Butterfly and I will wait for her,
No matter how long that’ll be,
Because she will more beautiful.

Days turn to weeks and weeks
Turn to months, and I float to
The Heavens and I cry buckets
Of tears as the cocoon opens

And I see the most prettiest and
Most graceful Butterfly I’ve ever
Seen in the world. My stomach
Begins to ache and my heart sinks

As I am left speechless at what
I see and what I’ve experienced.
Wings begin to form on my back
And I begin to fly towards her.

Her pretty eyes hypnotizes me
And her smile makes me smile.
Her laughter is contagious and
Being in her presence melts me.

I’ve grown during the wait and
I can say from the bottom of my
Heart that you’re the beautiful
Butterfly that I see in my dreams.

After so long I can say that I’m
Your Butterfly Dreamer and you
Are my Beautiful Butterfly Angel
And I’m happy to have met you

In Heaven.

I stand on the edge of a cliff up high in
The Heavens, surrounded by thick, gray
Clouds, and I’m blinded by the dense fog.

I feel myself being levitated higher into the
Heavens and thrown by an Evil Force, and I
Tumble through the endless darkness and

I land on a boat braving the tides of indecisions
And fear of the past, present, and future, and
I am tossed violently by the hopes, dreams,

And expectations. I paddle deeper into the
Endless ocean with neither an oar nor a sail
And the tides pulls me under and I gasp for

Breathe as I struggle to keep my head above
The water. I become more overwhelmed with
Every crashing wave and my boat fades away

Into the horizon and the fog grows thicker
Until I’m entirely blinded by all the “what ifs”
And the “maybes”, and suffocated by all that

“Could’ve”, “should’ve”, and “would’ve”.
I wait for a light to break through the dense
Fog, calm the tides, and to carry me back to

Where it all began. I pray to whoever will
Listen so I can be saved from this endless
Storm. With every tick and tock of the clock,

I grow more anxious and I begin to sweat.
I wonder if this is reality or if I am dreaming so
I open my eyes and I’m free falling through

The endless funnel of ominous, gray clouds
And my eyes grow bigger as I realize that this
Is not a dream but rather a nightmare that

I cannot escape not matter how hard I try.
It’s a monstrous, endless nightmare that
Has taken control of my mind and my life

And the worst part is: it’s all in my mind.

We live in an endless masquerade
Dancing to the same song in the
Same clothes but we change one thing.
We change our masks after every song
And we hide our true identity from the

Other guests at this masquerade.
We hide ourselves from our friends
And we hide ourselves from our family.
We hide ourselves from the most important
People at the masquerade: ourselves.

Every time we put a different mask on
We become someone we’re really not
Because we want to be that person or
Because everyone will like us if we’re
That person and not our true selves.

We change masks to hide the scars
Of our past and the pain we feel now
Sometimes people will like us if we
Only show the good and not the bad
Because the bad hurts not only us but them.

We were bullied when we were young
By our “friends” in school or at the park.
They called us names like “***” or “******”
Or push us down the stairs or into lockers
Or they call us fat because we are not skinny.

They call us names because they think they
Know us but they really don’t because we
Wear masks at this masquerade even when
We are bullied to hide our true emotions.
We wear masks because of these scars.

We change our masks because we don’t want
Everyone to know what we do or how we act
When we’re home with our family or friends.
In the masquerade we are friendly and nice but
At home we abuse our spouses or kids or friends.

We abuse them verbally or physically
Because we are drunk or we lost our jobs.
We scream at the top of our lungs because
That’s the only way we know how to relax.
That’s us when we’re not at the masquerade.

We lost our best friend from high school
Because he or she decided to commit suicide.
That was in the past but it felt like this morning so
We change masks to hide the pain we are feeling
With every passing second because we miss him or her.

Our world is an endless masquerade without an end
As we dance the dance of hiding our true identity from
Everyone we see with every change of the masks but
Our song is still the same. It’s the song of heartbreak
Because in this masquerade all we feel is pain and sadness.

We lose our true selves with each mask unless we,
With the help of someone, remove our masks and
Put an end to this never ending masquerade so we
Can live our lives the way we want to…as ourselves.
Until then, we dance the dance and change the mask.

Welcome to the Masquerade.

I use to put on different masks
Every day and every night so
I can fit in with certain people.

I use to be shy around everyone
Because I do not know if they
Will judge me if I open my mouth
And say one word like hey.

For the first time in a very long time,
I am not longer shy whenever I am
In your presence because you have

Broken the different masks that I wear
And you have found the true person
That I really am and the person that I
Want everyone in the world to see.

For the first time in many years, I don’t
Have the need or urge to question myself
About my actions or inactions because

I know that you will never judge me like
I am afraid everyone in the world will do
If I open my mouth to them to say hello
Or even when I try and start a conversation.

For the first time in my entire life, I don’t
Have to hide my emotions and true feelings
Behind my poems because I was afraid of what

You and anyone who read them might think.
I used my poems as masks every day and night
Because I don’t know how to show my true
Feelings in words without writing them down.

For the first time in my twenty-one years, I can
Actually say that I am no longer depressed. When
I am around you, I am floating high on a cloud and

I do not want to fall back to Earth and back to reality.
This is a great feeling and I don’t want this to end
Because I am afraid of what my happen and of how
I might feel when this feeling leaves my body.

I am enjoying my life for the first time and
I am enjoying spending every moment with
The one and only person that makes me happy

Whenever I am with that one person. I am happy
That for the first time in my entire life I no longer
Have the need to wear any mask because my life
Is perfect now when I am with that one person.

For the first time in my existence, I have met that
One girl that makes me the happiest man on the f
Face of this beautiful blue and green Earth: you.

Each poem I write about my true feelings,
I slowly chip away at the mask that I wear
For you to see who I  genuinely am, and it
Takes a lot of time, but it will be worth it.

We have slowly chipped away
The masks that we wear every day
With each poem that I write
And with each poem that you read.

Through my poetry we see cracks
Of light that is our true person that
We want to world  to see but we are
Afraid of how to show it to the world.

I hide behind my poetry because I don’t
Know how to tell the you and the world
How I genuinely feel about anything
And through my poetry I can do so

Without being afraid of directly saying
To every single person my true feelings
But after sharing my world with you
I am no longer afraid to tell you how

I genuinely feel because I have confidence
In myself because with each poem I write
You see cracks in my mask and light breaking
Through the cracks and my true self coming out.

I am no longer shy when I am around you
And I am my genuine self when we talk.
Everything that I have told you through my
Poetry is genuinely true and now what I will tell

You in person is my genuine self because there
Is no point in hiding who wer are anymore.
We have opened up to each other and there
Is no point in closing our book or ripping out pages.

Our books will remain open with blank pages to be
Filled as our genuine identity breaks through the
Masks that we wear every day and every night.
After you read this poem, you will have chipped

The last chip off my mask and my genine self will
Be exposed to you and to everyone in the world.
I will no longer afraid or shy to talk to you about
Anything and everything from my past that shaped

Me into who I am today no matter how bad my past
May have been because with every second I spend
With you my shyness and my mask melt away
And the person I wanted you to meet will still be there.

After you read this poem, I will be a new person
Whom I’ve never ever been before in my life.
After you read this poem, I will be somone better.
With this poem, I will be the genuine person that I am.

I will be who I really am with this poem.

There is only one person on my mind
When I close my eyes and dream.
I cannot get that person out of my mind.
No matter how hard I try, I cannot do it.

It feels like I’m living my dream
Every day and every night.
I don’t want to leave or make it stop
Because I want it to last forever.

Everything in my dream is in slow motion
And everything is so clear and vivid
That my dream is like a movie.
My dream is like a movie with no end in sight.

The star of my movie is you.
When I close my eyes,
I see you smiling, laughing, being yourself.
I don’t want this movie to end.

Your beautiful hair blowing in the breeze.
Your beautiful face without any make up on.
Your beautiful smile and beautiful laugh
That brightens my day and my life.

I don’t want these images to disappear.
I want to be mesmerized by your eyes
That are like stars in the night sky
And they look over me when I need guidance.

I do not want this dream to end
Because I am afraid that everything will be lost
And I will lose you forever.
I want to live this dream forever.

I want to be living a dream.

The world can be cold for many people
And they search for the support they need.
They search for a shoulder to cry on and
Two open ears to listen to their feelings.

They search for someone they call a friend
Because everyone needs that special person.
When we need someone to lean on,
We can count of our friends to be there.

Everyone searches for that special person
To carry them along their way like a brother.
Everyone searches for that special person
To love them like their own mother.

When you feel like you are lost in the world,
Lost in your own thoughts and emotions,
You search for that special someone
To help find you and guide you out of that forest.

When you feel like everyone around you
Is trying to take control of you and your life
And you feel confused about your role in the world,
You search for that person to put you on the right track.

When you cannot walk because of the weight
Of the world that is on your shoulders,
There will be someone there to lift you up,
Put you on his or her shoulder, and carry you home.

The special someone will be there to feed you,
To offer you a warm house and bed for you,
To offer you warm clothes to put on your back,
To make sure you are safe and sound.

That special someone will be there for you.
Will you be there for your special someone?

Will you be there?