how hypocritical it is to point at those who’ve “switched up” and make a vow you’ll never do the same.
now all you care about is reputation and status, like gordon ramsay
“****...what a shame.”
i must say it is unfortunate you let others influence you for the worse.
your behavior became unfamiliar to me, at the very least, reversed.
over and over you had promised you’d remain real
but as time passed that vow became dishonest.
it was disingenuous . . or so did it feel;
to judge ones poor character consisting of such callous and arrogance and say that could never be you.
but then to profess you’re madly in love with me, when you knew all too well this wasn’t true.
to claim you will remember those who stood by you even in your weakest moment.
hell, even if you do still care you certainly wouldn’t know how to show it.
to me you’re nothing but a stranger, a fake, no better than the next con.
because even when apart of me wants you back in my life, the other knows it’s better with you gone.

- d.berry

i miss you
and i know you miss me.
but we've both gone unnoticed
for so long,
“strangers” is the only title we hold
these days.
from time to time
i go to compose a new message
and type in your name at the top,
but my thumbs freeze.
staring at that blank text box,
i then realize i have nothing
to say to you.

- d.berry

eighteen years of my life gone
and i demand to know the truth.
nowadays hearts are afraid to love,
minds are afraid to think on their own,
people wish to have the lives of others through the screen of an iphone;
tell me, is this our youth?
we determine importance by numbers
shown on a single profile.
they’re told “do it for the ‘gram”
but little do you know
the pain they feel in real life
could never leave on their face,
a smile.

- d.berry

far too blessed to be stressin’.
i wish i would’ve known then
what i know now,
but it belongs to the past
so i gotta take it as a lesson.
constantly reminding myself to stay focused
on the right path,
looking ahead.
‘*** dontcha know muthafuckas  
don’t care about you
until you’re dead?

- d.berry

no face
no case
i should’ve been the one to tell you i needed space
but my hesitation wouldn’t erase
now i realize all the time that we spent together was a waste
i just wanted to be in a happy place...
and now you’re gone snap like that,
without a trace
it is what it is,
but sometimes i find myself reminiscing on
ya smile, ya jokes, ya taste
did we move too fast?
should we have gone at a slower pace?
i wanted you to be my lover,
my rock, my base
you know what they say,
slow and steady wins the race
guess we had to learn the hard way
when things started crashing down,
then shattered...
like a vase.

-d.berry

1:30 am:
u need to quit playing
n let me stress you out.
but only to relieve ya stress
later.

1:33 am:
why stress me
when you can *** me.
kiss and caress me
while calling me ****.
trailing ya lips
from my neck
down to my belly.

1:35 am:
why stress you?
cuz i wanna test you.
and once the test is thru,
i come onto you
like i belong to you.
got ya favorite song on too.

1:36 am: well dayum.
1:37 am: wordplay on scrabble,
my wordplay on crossword puzzle rn.
1:38 am: yeah that was cute or whateva...
still can't beat me though.

1:42 am:
u said i can’t beat you?
na i won’t.
unlike these other ******,
i’m respectful.
but one thing is for sure.
i certainly will eat you,
cuz ur worth making a mess for.
the way i clean up is nice,
i guess you lucked up. dice.
i'll beat you at the games you play,
not no physical fist fight.

1:48 am:
i respect what you stand for.
your voice leaves a burning
sensation in my core.
when **** start to get real,
turn off all the lights
and close the door.
i'm tryna find out
what that tongue do
and more.
i want you leaving me
desperate,
obsessed,
knees shaking
and ***** sore.

1:53 am:
***** sore?
u gonna be screaming for more.
i’m sorry but, you don’t know
what you’re in for.
when you signed up
did you read the fine print?
it says all of that is mine,
and i'm just givin' you a hint.
what’s mine, is mine.
what’s yours is yours.
so i guess u can find out
what this tongue does
and more.

2:02 am:
***** better be throbbin'.
like a bottle taken from an infant
leave me sobbin'.
you think you're the only one who's
in for a surprise?
tuh, baby you don't even realize
i can do things to you that'll have you
hypnotize.
call this ****** "houdini" ***'
bippity boppity boop
after one round
you'll be mesmerized.

2:11 am:
me? mesmerized?
yeah, you smoking that strong.
shawty you must not know,
i can hypnotize you
with this “magic wand”.
pull a bunny out my hat
and tell it to eat ya thong.
tie you up like a shoe
or a present.
i’m about to bless you
but i ain't no reverend.
your essence so precious
my breath is getting restless.
your *****,
i press with my fingers like textin'.
don’t lie to me in privacy.
i need truth, baby girl imma need u
to ride with me.
long journey ahead
imma need u to pack wisely.
no whining allowed,
don’t cry to me.
just vibe with me,
smile for me.

4:36 am:
he beat me that night...
and in all the right ways.

- d.berry

word of advice my dear?
please don’t ever let any man
tell you what you can & cannot do.
yes it may hurt at first,
yes you may shed a tear.
why listen to me?
well with these kind of things
i must admit i know a thing or two.
you are strong.
you are independent.
but how is it he always finds
something to call you out on,
as if you are the one in the wrong?
you are an individual.
you are you own alpha,
and a much better one
than he could ever be.
know your worth.
have faith.
trust God’s path for you
and you will soon see.
do not mope.
do not frown.
it’s slipping! it’s slipping!
don’t you hear me my dear,
stay mindful of that up on your
head-
for it is your crown.
you’ve been here before
this aching dull pain in your
heart is nothing new.
although i know it’s quite
an unfortunate feeling
to get used to.
find the inner strength
to pull out useless memories
as if they are damaged weeds.
suga can’t you realize
that it is you every man needs.
wash your body of his touch.
clear your mind of his voice.
a fresh start is what you need,
i don’t think that’s
asking for too much.
they play you like a doll.
they take you as a fool.
celebrate with their boys every time they score a touchdown,
it isn’t easy
letting someone into your garden
free of charge.
for odd reasons they find the
“hit it and quit it” method
to be cool.
now now do not be too hard
on yourself
my sweet, sweet girl.
like any good person
you gave him the benefit
of the doubt.
you didn’t expect him to leave you wounded,
manipulated,
and lied to.
i would think no one ever assumed so suddenly
he would be up and out.
even your momma loved him.
oh boy, what to say to momma.
will she be disappointed?
will it break her heart?
or will she simply reply
“i knew he was no good
for you child, yes indeed
i knew it from the very start.”
it’s his loss
and yes that saying
is rather cliche.
but you are going to be
an extraordinary wife
and a remarkable mother one day.
do not sulk.
do not cry.
do not sit in bed at 3 in the mornin’
asking the good lord
“why?”
you must take each day
at a time queen.
no, do not shout
“****** ain’t ****”
for there is no logical reason
to be mean.
take as much time as you need
for yourself.
do not change your heart
or the beautiful person you are.
what happened to you can be
deeply hidden.
you smile on the outside
what remains on that
fragile little heart
is a scar.
keep being that positive,
outgoing,
goofy but flawed woman.
stay focused,
keep your priorities aligned.
the one who puts others before herself, the one who is thankful for the life God has blessed her with,
the one who is sensible,
understanding and kind.
now i hope you’ve gained
something from these words,
at least one or two.
and before you go
have i mentioned my dear,
never let a man tell you
what you can & cannot do.

- d.berry