Quiet nights spent lying on a bed of nails,
feeling the ****** of tearful dreams.  
My conscious mind whispering judgment,
telling me that it can never be;
a broken heart, denying its true feelings
for the sake of expectation.

A lie meant to build barriers,
to prevent me from seeing the beauty
of the possibility.  
These quaking hands touching the pieces of hope,
tiny wisps escaping within the evening winds.
My intrepid spirit refuses to accept fate,
no longer believing in destiny.

Tonight, I will test the unseen;
to evoke the musings of the universe.
At this moment,
I am surrendering the impossibilities
and believing one day, you will be mine.

Come inside
So that we may share
This moment

We can speak
About the superficial
To test the unwritten premise

We can explore
The deeper levels
Within our evening contemplation

We can say nothing
Letting our spirits interject
Beneath the sheets

Refusing to sleep
So we may remember
In the morning

Morning light obscured by the frosted memories;
time carries no sympathy for the remorse of
seconds traveling within my shivering hands.

I dream of sleep.

Attempting to free my mind of thoughts
by staring at the sunless horizon. Taunted
by cliches; these menageries clouding
the moment.

I long for sustenance.

The refrigerator is full of food
yet, I am starving to death. Night
comes quickly, my body huddled in
fear of being alone.

I laugh.

This season will inevitably change
so I wait, patiently, for the next.

I remember the first time
*** sold broken promises,
signed with dreams and
sealed with kisses.

Feeling special
was all we wanted;
removing loneliness
from the room. The first time
we consummated our affection
in that single dorm room.

I said "I love you,"
She reciprocated by
sleeping with someone else.
Happiness conceived
in my bed of imaginations
disappeared
like shadows in the dark

Gentle breeze becoming
A violent storm;
Listening to the whispers
Within the rain.
Setting myself adrift
On, the crashing waves;
Allowing the currents
To take me…wherever.

Sleep was nothing but a myth;
nightmares ruled the day.

Vocabulary limited to an apology,
strength dwindled beneath
the weight of pity.

It was a slow progression
on broken glass
towards the darkened room;
insidious laughter cackling
from within the demise.

The smell of ******* and bureaucracy
induced violent convulsions;
the mental walls came tumbling down.

Spending time chasing dreams in the dark;
whispering to one another about the things
we call “happiness”.

Checking our pockets for change
to buy hope and keep
our bellies full of joy;
injecting our minds with allusions
to dispel the horrors of our nightmares.

This is our drug
to cope with the fear of
loneliness in the night;
following the tracks to avoid
the slums that we must pass through.

“Love” was never a friend
just the trickster who stole
our moral decency;
the dealer of truth and lies.