"Don't drink that coffee," my friend shouted at me,
    "That caffeine will **** you!"
    he said impatiently!

Drinking water is bad for your health,
    the feds put fluorine in it
    to **** you by stealth."

Paternally he whispered,

"Whatever you do, don't drink cows' milk.
    the sucklings its made for
    aren't close to our ilk.

The consumption of pigs and animals that ****,
    most certainly will keep you
    from obtaining sweet bliss.

And stay away from creatures that swim in the sea,
    their svelte tasty bodies are filled
    with deadly mercury."

And then he looked aghast at my plate,

"Tell me you're not eating that excrement," he sighed,
    "Do you really want to die...
     from eating french fries?

Don't you know that fried things are the scourge of the planet,
    cooked in hydrogenated fats by
    some woman named Janet?

Avoid eggs, if you can, and by no means eat the yolks,
    your cholesterol will rise,
    that's no funny joke."

Then, with a scowl in his voice he said,

"Avoid plants grown in this country,
    sprayed with pesticides and poisons
    by corporate monkeys.

And stay away from foods grown in the East,
    they're probably fertilized by
    humans, dragons and beasts.

Potatoes, tomatoes have starch and acid,
    that eats up your guts and
    make you grow flaccid.

Lemons and limes will ruin your pretty white teeth,
    making you go snaggle
    right in your sleep."

With a superior air he ended his harangue,

"Beer, wine, and all forms of liquor,
    Can you think of anything that
    will **** you quicker?

Don't eat rich chocolate--it'll make you a ****,
    ******* everything in sight
    like a mad deer in rut.

Cakes, breads and cookies too,
    contain sugars and flours that's
    sooooo baaaaad for you.

                           ~~~

I'm hungry and starving and don't know what to do,
    I want to eat something
    but afraid to give it a chew.

Though all of this leaves me feeling quite uneasy and queasy,
    I'm closing the door and
    doing as I pleasey!

I see in you a man full of strength and stature.
  A character with character,
  I would gladly shake your hand
  and spend time with you.

A melding of the OC maroon and the Tennessee orange,
  You are part guide and part scholar
  who faithfully bridges the gaps
  between young and old,
  church and community,
  scholarship and practice.

Your appearance is one of a big kid
  who is known and loved by all, yet
  displaying a confident purpose and intensity
  that can only come from years of service
  and a wisdom that comes from
  loving the one who loves
  all of us perfectly.

Thank you for what you do,  and
  may you continue spreading
  His loving message
  of hope and reconciliation
  to future generations
  as you enjoy the continued
  favor of your God and fellows.

Back in my fundie days,

   Anyone could be happy, if
   They really wanted to.

   If you tried hard enough, all
   Your wishes would come true.

   Love was forever and divorces weren't possible, unless
   You were selfish.

   Kids didn't disappoint their parents, if
   You raised them right.

   People had addictions because they chose them, and
   They could quit if they'd just stop.

   Depression was a sign that
   You weren't relying upon God enough.
   Back in my fundie days.

Back in my fundie days,

   I had a fish on my car, an index finger in the air, and
   a pipeline to God.

   I was going to heaven and
   I knew how you could too.

   There was only one name for the Almighty, and
   It was “God,” and God was a HE.

   Prayers were always answered, if
   You had enough faith.

   All solutions were found in the Good Book, and
   You could look them up for yourself.
   Back in my fundie days.

Back in my fundie days,

   I lived in a country founded on Christian principles,
   the ten commandments and the twelve apostles.

   People were poor, because
   They were lazy and didn't want to work.

   My country was right, and
   If you disagreed, you could move away.

   Protesters were communists, who were
   Trying to tear this country down.

   English was the undisputed language,
   Both here and abroad.
   Back in my fundie days.

Back in my fundie days,

   I knew the difference between right and wrong,
   With no shades of confusing gray.
   There was a place for everything.
   You, me, us, them,
   God, family, country, life...

   It was much simpler, when
   There were more answers
   Back in my fundie days.

Is she a ghost?

Walking amidst flowers,
her mind set upon the future and past,
never upon the exquisite bloom or fragrance.

Looking straight into my eyes,
she's not here.

Pondering the next thing she will say
or looking for opportunities to get away,
she overlooks the divine before her.

Her spirit, flying through the air
or driving down the road,
arrives but never remembers the trip.

Playing with children,
wishing the room was clean,

Making love,
thinking of someone else,

Her body is here
but she is not.

Wispy, ghostly, corporeal being,
fearing the end,
but why should she?

She was never here.

These days, it’s getting harder for me to hear, though
  My hearing is perfectly fine.  

Words, speech, rhetoric, proclaimed in our
  Homes, schools, churches, media and lives,
  Filled with anger, pain, rage,
  Endless debating, name calling,
  Attacking, yelling, shouting,
  Drama and diatribes.

A new willingness sweeps the land, offering
  Gratuitous unfiltered honesty.
  A truth sport that calculatingly
  Cuts off at the knees,
  Sending the newly scarred and
  Wounded soul to walk away, with
  A knife in their back.

What unfulfilled need justifies
  This anger, frustration, rage,
  Blaming, shaming and finger pointing,
  And the creation of new effigies by endlessly
  Dissecting and parsing every word and phrase?

Have we become little more than
  Hurting people who hurt others?
  Are we just reacting in kind with a
  Pent-up frustration that has nowhere to go?

Are we really so fearful that
  Things aren’t going as they should, afraid
  We’ll never get what we want, or scared that
  We’ll never have what we need?
  
Could it be that we are unconsciously
  Caught in a vibration of drama, and
  Easy prey for the hidden plans
  And agendas of others?

Or, have we become slaves of an ego
  That willingly fills our minds with
  Unproven certainties to
  Give us what we do not have but want?

Maybe, strangely, we are
  Seeking a connection in the
  Only way we know.
  Hoping our shrill voices will
  Convince the universe that we matter,
  As we misguidedly attempt to make
  Some difference on our piece of earth.

This isn’t life!
  Yelling never convinces a single soul
  About the rightness of a cause or the
  Correctness of an action.  
  It only drives us further apart and
  Makes us dead to ourselves and each other.

Perhaps it's time to remember
  The wisdom of the ancients,
  Spoken so long ago.
  In compassion there is virtue,
  Blessed are the peacemakers,
  What is given is returned
  A thousand fold; and,  
  In the measure we judge,
  We shall be judged,
  Love the Gods and
  Do no harm.

These days, it’s getting harder for me to hear, though
  My hearing is perfectly fine.

Imagine...

Loving her purely, completely and unconditionally,
   trusting that you will always do
   the right thing for her.

Listening to her heart,
   instead of her words,
   while she listens to yours.

Whispering words of love
  that find her heart
  as they should,

Having absolute trust in the power of  love,
   faith in the goodness  of all things and outcomes,
   no matter the circumstances.

If we do the things
     that make for war,
Let us not wonder
     why we have no peace.

If we criticize and judge
     the ones we love,
Let us not wonder
    why no one loves us unconditionally.

If we put ourselves
     first before others,
Let us not wonder
     why no one treats us as equals.

If we are defensive
     and always right,
Let us not wonder
     why no one listens to us.

If we know just what to do
     and always have good advice,
Let us not wonder
     why our cup is never filled.

If we spend our lives
     caught in mediocrity,
Let us not wonder
    why our lives feel so worthless.

Precious Father,

I'm so glad to come into your presence,
to spend time with you and get to
know you better. I...

  wonder when the mechanic
  is going to be finished with the car?
  He said, it would be ready two days ago.
  Sheesh! Can you count on anyone these days?

Oh, sorry God!
I'm back. Where was I?
I need your help in so many things.
I'm so glad that I can turn to you. I ...

  simply cannot believe what my boss said
  to her about me! That lousy no good slime ball
  better stay out of my way...

Oh my goodness!  God, I just remembered that
I've got to send that email I promised right away!
Love you! Gotta go and

I'll talk to you later!

Amen.

I go to a church that's broken.
   One that's cracked to the core
   and had its comeuppance.

It beaten, battered and knocked to the floor.
   Some said,  "We may as well close the doors."
   "All the good is gone--we'll never be as we were before."

But God is good.
   Peace and people are slowly coming back.
   But not the same folks as when we were on-track.

Lives mired and full of sin,
   most have given up on them.
   Bruised, broken and knocked about,
   the ones who are clearly on the outs.

Now that the strong ones are on the run,
   all pretensions here are done.
   I'm glad I attend this outcast place,
   full of cast-offs from the human race.
  
God's triage comes from this salt of the earth.
   Something's finally getting done.
   We're seeing rebirth.

With sensuous cords suspended
   between heaven and earth,
   A nylon hammock generously supports
   all,  races, colors and creeds.
  
Guilty pleasures are carefully balanced
   during a rendezvous of
   stolen moments and secret escapes.  

Ideas are born
   in this cocooning nexus, and
   work is accomplished from
   a place of succor and rest.

A gentle  swaying
  calms the mind and
  brings life into balance once more.

My Darling,

  Friends tell me we met more than half a million minutes ago.
     But I noticed, before a few seconds had hardly passed,
     That time was standing still.

  In its place, a merged continuum of
     Tender touches, love, kindnesses and gifts of presence
     All indescribably nuanced, existed.

  Before,
     There were beginnings and endings marked by
     An endless procession of sunrises and sunsets.

  Now
     It’s days of azure and crimson filled with
     Winding walks, delicious dinners, long slow kisses
     and careful careless caresses that stop only long enough for
     us to visit our children, mothers, friends and work.

  Before,
     There was only myself.
     A tree bending in a mighty wind.

  Now,
     We have the shelter of each other,
     A holy temple, our haven
     That shields and holds us safe.

  Before,
     I experienced only myself.

  Now,
     There is  us!
     A co-creation of meanings, moments and
     Transformations into all things new.

My darling,*

  The once stopped clock may still be ticking.
     But for me, time continues to stand still.
     And that’s a supernatural possibility,
     Available only for those who discover, that
     Love is all there is.

  And we have!

Stay strong and courageous
   in the Lord.
  
Remember and know,
   He upholds you
   with His mighty
   right hand.  

No matter what
   you may be feeling
   physically, emotionally,
   or spiritually,
   He will never forget
   or forsake you.  

He's there right now,
   Making his face to
   shine upon you,
   listening to
   loving petitions
   from your family
   and friends, and
   giving you peace.

Even as you walk through this fire,
   He is saying to the evil one,
   “What do you think
   of my servant John Maple?
   No one on earth is like him.
   He is a truly good person,
   who respects me and
   refuses to do evil.”

My friend,
   rest well.
   You are in
   Good hands.