You can forgive, not forget
Because the past never really dies
It fades away into awkward silences
And sideways glances
Just below the surface, hidden in plain sight
Things always end badly
Because the end only comes when something has gone wrong
Knowing this, I was still shocked to see you become
So cruel and callous a person
Without a **** to give for those you loved

The shadows of love become the ghosts of the past
Found only in the smells trapped between your sheets
Friendships fade into nothingness leaving so little trace
You can hardly believe they were real
Times do change and people grow up
But every so often, someone gets left behind
Cigarette after cigarette just biding their time
Until they can again find meaning in life

Honest moments are born
In the predawn stillness of the night
Tearful confessions whispered
Into the nook of one's neck
Smoke drifting lazily towards the ceiling
While the candle flickers in the background
Dancing and dancing all of the pain away

You can make peace with the past
But it will never truly fade
The thousand days I spent with you
Now fill my heart with pain
We were so close, our friendship solid
But sadly change came around
Our priorities were different
Your choices were clear
As you buried me in the ground

Promises are made to be broken and
Your words are as hollow as this home
Empty gestures I no longer believe in
And a sense of dread whenever you call
Friendship is a two way street
But I had to put all the time in
Next time you call I won't answer the phone
Find a new fool to confide in

One man army staring into the abyss
Thin skinned crusader trying to shift the culture
But when you fall, you fall alone
And rock bottom is a lonely place
Every night another war to be fought
Allies perished, friends are gone
So this is growing up my darling
I'm not sure how long I can go on

Contrast is stunning and
My life is the greatest juxtaposition
Depression and anxiety
Drained of energy, bouncing off the walls
Stared death in the face a few times
Victim to the darkest spots in my mind
Suicidal, still living day after day
Stuck here forever, in a world full of grey