You try and you try and you try
And it doesn't change a ******* thing
Then you blame yourself and you blame yourself and you blame yourself
And wonder what could have been

I like the early mornings
When you're not as guarded
When your walls come down
At least for a little while
I like it when you're like this
With your adorable bed hair
And pillow creases imprinted on your cheek
And glasses placed haphazardly on the bridge of your nose
I like it when you're like this
Smiling softly at me
(With crinkly eyes
And blushing cheeks)
Open and honest and trusting
I like it when you're like this
Because I know that when you smile
You smile for no one else but me

I'm getting better
And you know what's the best part?
You're not fixing me

I loved a boy before
Who had angry slashes on his wrist
And drank way too much
Way too often

Sometimes he would go
To all these buildings
And he would step on the ledges
With his arms wide open
And a manic gleam in his eyes

My best friend said
That I should run away
Get away from him
Because he is far too damaged
And far too scarred
She said he was broken

I said I loved him
She said she didn't get it

But the thing is
She didn't see him
Smiling gently at the fireworks
During the 4th of July

And she didn't see him
Tracing the words
On his favorite books
With a reverent kind of awe

And she didn't see him
Laugh when it started
To rain

I think what I'm trying to say here is
She didn't see the parts
Which made him so easy
So very easy to love

He didn't either

We used to write stories on each other’s arm
About Greek gods
I wrote about Apollo and how my world revolves around him
Because Apollo is made of sunlight and he just ******* bursts with starshine
And the beating of his heart is a melody sung by the highest angel
You wrote about Zeus
'Cause all your life you've been treated like ****
And you just wanted to feel something other than pain
And the sound of your father’s voice calling you weak and worthless and
It just hurts so much, doesn’t it?

I packed a suitcase full of your favorite books
And those green pens you always tuck behind you ear
I took you to Paris then Venice then Spain
You looked happy, I think
Most especially in the spaces between the seconds

You painted a picture of me
Using the words
"Hurricane" and "Torrential" and "Catastrophic"
But I know now that that is how you say I love you

You caught raindrops on your palm
And pretended it was Aphrodite’s tears
And you drank it with a broken kind of need

You wrote about Zeus
'Cause all your life you've been treated like ****
I wrote about Apollo

And the way my world revolves around him
You will never know that I wrote about you
And I’ve always been writing about you

"Please stop tapping out messages in Morse Code. I can’t understand it" I once said
But now I know that that is how you say I love you

To write from the gutter to the pavements to the rooftops to the high heavens above
To **** whoever we want to love
To let the ink flow whichever way it wants to flow be it up or down
Or to the direction of the city sound
To spray obscenities in bathroom stalls and government walls
To wear nothing at all
To sing songs bout a woman loving another woman in her philosophy class
with long locks and red lips and a huge ***
To read books bout smoking cigarettes in the summer air
About sticking flowers into our hair
To drink ***** till everything is on fire
To look into the President's eyes and shout LIAR YOU ******* LIAR
To get tattoos of dead revolutionaries and their lovers
Who ****** them on top of city maps and uprising plans and table covers
To make art out of abandoned houses and dried up lakes  
To build jailhouses for all the fakes
To shout and sing and **** and write and paint and live as we wish
To go sleeping only when life has run out of bliss