If people were rain,
I was drizzle,
and she was a hurricane."

Maybe I am one, a hurricane.
Inside I crave the peace and serenity
Granted to mid-morning drizzles
Falling gently on side walks,
But I cannot calm my dark,
Repetitive, abrasive thoughts enough
To bring in and accept my
Yearning for some quiet.

I can never stay anywhere,
With anyone,
For too long.

"I need to go. I need to get out of here."*

But, with you,
I forget time.
I feel open and vulnerable.
I just want to stop it all,
And just be happy.

Is that alright?

it was anything but that for us to be holding hands along the river
it was anything but that before we could sing with abandon to our favourites
it was anything but that but now
now this love is easy, my smiles are easy
and happiness is easy.

I guess I’m always going to have to 
Pretend that my heart doesn’t sing
Every time it sees you and
Registers your eyes, your smile, your dimples
I’ll numb all of that heart-thumping joy
And pretend again that you’re just a friend.
Just a little more than a friend. 

I guess I’m always going to dismiss your sweet words
And just force myself look the other way, the “right" way,
Away from your eyes, your smile, your dimples
But I’m always going to put one hand behind my back
Just in case one day, you’d hold it and then
You’d hold me and somehow, just somehow,
We’d be imperfectly perfect together.