Courtney shields

Courtney shields Apr 2020

Him: Imma stay
I've been told that one million times by men that have entered me
I won't hurt you he whispers to me so ******* gracefully
Right before he stabs me in my back
All I've tried to do was love but it seems as if my heart get heavier and it weigh down my chest and my soul becomes weaker
Him: Imma stay
he say as he kisses my lips and enters me filling me up with everything he has and the only thing he had to offer
Him: Imma stay
he said as he slowly stroked and choked and pushed and I set there as he ****** me but he had pleasure in the ***** he took
HIM: Imma stay
As he whispered in my ears you feel that and I whispering back where's the men in you
HIM: Imma stay
he whispers as he finishes
HIM: imma stay I won't leave you Imma stay
as his breath sits on my face
Him: Imma stay
ME: They never do

poem of a broken love of men with broken promises. I've been gone for some time and I hope you like I write what i feel and everything Ive been thur so look for more.

Courtney shields Jul 2017

roses & violets

roses are red violets are not blue
can someone tell me what rhymes with I LOVE YOU
wove you shove you dug you hug you
roses are red violets are blue can someone tell me what rhymes with YOU.
many things there are an many it can be you are a star that shines bright thru the night I love the way you smile the way you walk I love the way you talk but what rhymes with you is it who what when where you.......... can you tell me the color of your shoe
Roses are red violets are not blue but this is the best I can do to find things that rhymes with I LOVE YOU

Courtney shields Jul 2017

death of a brother

I can't being to say I know how it feels or how you feel, because I don't losing someone or something close to you hurts more than a broken arm more then that gun wound. It's like knowing that the last time you saw that person will be the last time you see him. I start to wonder for a minute how can you just laugh with someone one day and the next there gone for good and you didn't even get to say bye
Holding on to ever memory that you two shared even the bad ones but the worst one is when you left an that's the memory I have left that's the picture in my head no happy memories only the one of you lying dead in my arms try to struggle for that last breath I sat there for while and I think and I stared off into space I cant even smile but I begin to cry knowing today will be the last day the last time I'll ever see or hear your voice I can't begin to say I know how you feel or what you are feeling or the images in your head as you watched your brother die but all I can say is everything will be alright. R.I.P cam

letter to my dearest friend

Courtney shields Jul 2017

Invaded space

when I'm alone in my room I feel my body. and it feels untrue as my hand rubs it feels like glue. your body is a temple they say, treat it with respect..........What do you see when you look at me? do your eyes undress me. Do you wish your hand was ******* caressing me. What do you think you may feel when you rub your hands on my body? what did you feel? Did you like it? As you took the only thing I had of mine. Did you smile after you was done? feeling me and rubbing me. How did you feel? Because I felt pain and weak that when I touch my body I feel dead inside............. So what do you feel? Or what did you feel? when you invaded my space and moved your hands alone my waist. Did you feel like a man ? A strong *** man?? Did you feel like man when you not only undressed me with your eyes but with your hands

I have been gone for some time but im back and even better

Courtney shields Apr 2017

LISTEN UP

You don't listen to me and that's ok
I'm the daughter and your the mom and you want it your way
You don't listen to me
And yes sometimes u be right
I laugh because you look stupid fighting this fight
You don't listen to me and I don't listen to you because my way is right and your just in the way
You don't listen and I already probably said this twice
Into I leave for good maybe you would learn how to listen right P

Courtney shields Apr 2017

MOTHER

you are the parasite that lives in my heart that killed my soul and made these scars
Am I mean for saying that telling you how u feel means talking back
I don't understand because maybe I'm to young no I understand perfectly it's just your two dumb
I'm sorry that totally came out wrong
You are my mom and I have to respect that and listen and say yes ma'am and shut my trap yes
Ma'am can I have 2 headphones on you say no because I have to know what going on I'm sorry ma'am am I wrong did you want ice in your water did I pour it wrong fill it to the top put a lot of ice in my cup just the way you like it ma'am I'll be right back with that **** that cuz I sound like a slave get **** for my master and me getting beat and trying to hind all these dame scars on my back so
Am I to mean for saying that do I get punished for speaking back sorry Ma'am I honestly didn't hear that

Courtney shields Apr 2017

**** experience

For a moment I thought everything was gone I wasn't here and I was flying but everything got heavy my shoulders felt as if rocks was holding them down and my heart beating fast but everything else was moving slow..... for a moment I felt at peace and free!! I laughed and giggled but I new it was gonna leave I stopped and stared only to find peace... for that moment I felt free lifted from all problems and happy. for a moment I didn't care about who I was and how I got there but the place I was at was unbelievable New!...... for a moment I thought everything was gone but it was the beginning of something big and my first **** EXPERIENCE!