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1.7k · Mar 2012
Grandpa
Courtney Mar 2012
Whistling softly,
Eyes focused upon your goal,
you carve beautiful masterpieces.

Whistling softly,
eyes focused upon your goal,
you ride your motorcycle.

Whistling softly,
eyes focused upon your goal,
you go to drink that beer.

Whistling softly,
eyes focused upon your goal,
you walk through the pain.

Whistling softly,
eyes distant,
thinking back upon your life,
you laugh until tears roll out of your eyes.

Whistling softly,
eyes focused upon my goal,
I live life,
and learn from you.
1.2k · Mar 2012
You don't know me.
Courtney Mar 2012
You don't know my pain,
the way it shines within my eyes,
sparkling like the gleam of happiness,
hidden within a shadow,

You don't know my anguish,
in the loss of my family,
the splitting of a life,
torn between two parents,

You don't know my happiness,
the changing of a number,
sun shining on my face,
texture of a page,
holding a world in my hands,

You don't know my name,
what colors I wear,
actions to make my heart beat fast,
the place where thoughts can be revealed,

You don't know me,
Don't try to tell me what to do,
you'll just end up looking stupid,
and i'll just end up doing what I want to do.
649 · Mar 2012
Slumber
Courtney Mar 2012
I lost myself inside a dream,
Where you were there beside me.
I held your hand,
I hugged your body,
Your heart beat into my ear.

I lost myself inside a dream,
Where I was there beside you.
You talked to me,
Told me your plans,
I missed the truth beneath your sounds.

I lost myself inside a dream,
Where I thought we could be happy.
Alone and snuggled under a blanket,
I yearn to go back to slumber,
And sit with you one more time.
614 · Mar 2012
New beginnings
Courtney Mar 2012
I used it as protection,
But now I'm set free,
Come on sweetheart,
Take a look at what's deep inside me.
I've shed skins,
Changed looks,
Fell apart.
I've taken a look,
Found what's deep inside my heart.
What was once lost,
Now is found,
My commitment,
Gold and glitter bound.
There’s an end in sight,
A reason for every single plight,
I can see the changes made,
Never again into that void will I fade.
One thing you must know,
Do not go light upon my heart,
It yearns for love,
And at the simplest touch,
Could fall apart.
Go hard and strong,
Tear my fears apart,
Otherwise,
There is no chance,
Of you coming into my heart.
So lonely and tired I sit alone,
Arms wrapped around myself,
Tears falling,
Fears crawling,
Heart thawing,
To the possibilities,
What could be,
Should be,
Would be,
A touch,
A hug,
A kiss,
Teenage love,
Some of which experience proves no happiness,
Others of which will never happen.
I do not cry for the things that never happen,
Yet I yearn so full heartedly,
Of that for which I have always wanted.
Intimacy of heart and soul,
Body and mind,
A best friend that completes me,
Teaches me,
Consoles me.
Someone who can tell me when I'm a *******,
or rude or mean,
Someone who knows my soul,
And can still let me be ME.
It doesn't have to be anything other than real.
I'm terrified that I will never find this,
That I'm destined to forever be alone,
Never to experience true bliss,
To roam until death without the kiss of Love on my forehead,
Hand always groping air,
Struggling for the connection that isn't there,
Pain shown in my eyes,
Pain felt in my heart,
Pain scattered in my fear,
Don't leave me empty,
Cold,
Bitter,
Alone,
I have had enough of that,
It has left,
It is gone,
I too will go forth and stay strong,
For my heart yearns,
Hoping that something will come along.
Until then,
It sits in wait,
A lonely little thing,
Waiting for its mate.
548 · Mar 2012
The future
Courtney Mar 2012
I sit and stare
Eyes focused on some far away place
mind racing,
heart pacing,

Lost,

You don't see me,
if I act invisible,
You can't possibly see me,
if I try to hide,

Found,

Smiling,
broken barriers left behind,
eyes back in focus,
heartbeat blipping along normally,

Possibilities,

Bright and cheery,
light shining from within,
striving forward,
determined to do best,

Purpose.

— The End —