I must admire what I cannot see.
Stronger than sinew and bone,
Something skin deep laced throughout the body.
Into ribbons, into knots, holding it all together
I can see frays in the wire but never a clean break
I could never see you break.
The strain of an elegantly genius mind.
Like ice to a furnace I depart from the numb I once knew.
My body shaking from the cold,
The blush in my cheeks is because i'm warming up
Honest
I cant help it
When you talk to me.

Disturbed, twisted and putrid
Tar runs through my veins into my shallow beating heart.
A shadow chills my bones
a voice made of ice promises restitution.
My eyes as hollow and purposeful as a death in space.
  It makes my heart writhe like serpents being branded by Irons.
I have no room for this emotion.
Not anymore.

A dim red hue over the proudest face a child could make.
A dancing light in the night that shatters into fireflies.
I am merely the kid who's head hit the concrete softly as you pushed.
Scraping my hand and knees
I am merely the man who plundered his own soul to support the ones he loved.
I am merely the person with less than an ounce of worth left who can look at the faces of those who have wronged him to say.
I don't hate you.
Every moment from before the moment I became who I am.
Yesterday I was somebody else, tomorrow will be no different.
Taking moments from years and starting only now to count my centuries.
And as the gibberish flows from my mouth and you are left with an idea of.
Ok.
I captivate one person only for the purpose of this modern day experiment of what comes next.
Merely to pass my days till the day I die.
That's who I am

I have a **** magazine to my left.
The pictures, they don't do anything.
The games on my computer.
Analyzed and stripped of any recreational value.
I don't have the want for people
So I make no effort to call them
I'm wearing 4 layers
tanktop, tshirt, sweater, jacket.
I'm still cold, very cold.
I've trained myself to be patient.
"time will pass."
So I sit here on my bed.
Cold, and numb.
Waiting.