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Can't help but wonder if I'm right
In all I see have I lost sight
Home of the brave, land of the free
Where is my humanity

Have I carelessly thrown in my lot
With those that hold onto wrong thoughts
In letting them convince me
It's for the betterment of humanity

Letting forces, force me into
Things I wish I never knew
At times ashamed of what I see
On the scale of my humanity

Afraid of what I'm turning to
The further away I move from truth
The facts run cold, the lies run deep
Slicing at humanity

Shaky ground on sinking sand
The hardened heart of wicked man
The seeds I sow I'll come to reap
In the letting go of humanity
I have to wonder if those I side with are right...
Manon (Mary) and I, sat in the Tuileries gardens, by the Louvre Museum. Her 7 month old daughter, Devyn, on a blanket in the grass, was earnestly practicing a roll from her tummy to her back - of course, we coo’d and applauded each success.

We’d been girls together, years ago, in 5th and 6th grade - we were ‘like thieves at a fair’ back then - playing ‘la marelle’ (hopscotch) and pétanque until the boys, in early exercise of their ‘penised privilege’ ran us off the court, scattering us like birds.

She wrote me off a few years ago. But to be fair, I was missing. Growing up, my family moved around like we were on the run. I’d come back to Paris some summers and we’d check-in, but summer schedules are ephemeral and years turned into distance and a seemingly permanent silence.

Her last voice message, from 2017, is still on my phone, her voice bright, cheerful and expectant. I listen to it every once in a while, holding my phone to my ear, like a private seashell.

I was moved to China, where I’m told - thank you, Grandmère - I picked up a brash, incisive, Cantonese, ‘overly-direct’ manor, while Manon,went on to Institut Villa Pierrefeu, a finishing school in Switzerland.

Her hands move like ballerinas, her voice is as clear and refined as
Baccarat crystal, her look - bixie-cut chestnut brown hair, a white, Fontaine Zuave shirt over black, ME+EM Italian Linen Wide-Leg Trousers with Keds canvas sneakers, is Parisian simple and elegant and her posture is effortlessly perfect - she makes me feel like a scrub in my black Beatles t-shirt and jeans.

I passed Manon on an escalator, two days ago in Le Bon Marché.
I was going up, she was going down, with this little Devyn doll on her hip. The little firecracker I’d only seen on Instagram was dynamite in person. Her little expressions are bright-eyed and somehow familiar, their laughs - mother and daughter - are the same, rolling, lilting trills I know by heart.

My watch showed 69°f as we sprawled picnicking on a tree-lined embankment of the slithering green Seine. Rain clouds were gathering to the south - the river acts like a compass -which can be handy. Looking back on friendships is fun, but now we’re looking forward - which feels like home.
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Songs for this:
New Toy by Lene Lovich
My Old School by Steely Dan
Angel by Sarah McLachlan
BLT Merriam Webster word of the day challenge 08/29/25:
Incisive = impressively direct and decisive
Living Sadness in a world that doesn’t stop moving,
Just because you’re sad

Forgiveness on the tip of the tongue

The strange intimacy of unspoken truths
Of sacred silence
Of quiet, forbidden longing  

The mad unfurling of a blueish love-
A love somewhere between earth and sky
Friend and Foe
Flame and ash and all that burns

Folding a corner
Turning a page
Finishing a book
Keeping it on the shelf
Forever,  
Even if just for the memory

These are the things,
The things that make me think of you.
I am now a natural gem,
A mix of murk and clear,
Different colors or shades.

I am now a healed piece of earth,
A patch of glow over the ashes of disease,
Diverse as I breathe in fresh air.
The water comes and brings the earth,
The earth turns to ash as the fire rolls in,
The fire's ash turns into the wind,
The wind brings the water again.
So many times
I fell behind  
And my fears
Got the best of me.  

Caught by surprise              
In your looking-glass
Eyes
I locked into                          
Blew my mind--                    
I was not of your kind.  

But I still stayed                             By your side                        
There to guide  
My steps everyday                            
In every way;  
Trapped inside the
Obligation to stay.  

I thought you were
My friend;    
I had to pretend
To fool myself into
Believing in you.  

Caught in your lies,               
Hid behind your      
Disguise  
That you built up                    
Through the night--      
Nocturnal sight.  

You destroy             
Those you cannot
Pay;         
But those you've
Betrayed  
Now have better
sight,  
Brighter light,  
Slowly building up
The  
Strength to fight.  

And of all the
promises       
That you break,  
You justify by the
Laws               
Of give and take.  

These political and
Social              
Fault lines in the
Minds                
Of many, undermine  
Highlights--now the  
Cultural and structural  
Twilight--

The ancient                             
Disconnect between                    
The power elite  
And the people on the
Level of the street--     

Leading to higher
Levels
Of political and              
Social Chameleonic         Descent;  
Left wondering                  
Where our       
Idealistic & democratic               Societies went.          

So, as we watch  
Many of the global
Power elite  
Play their games
Of hide & seek                          
Behind           
The weight of policy--
That higher degree of                      Moral, political                    
And social leprosy--

You'll look for us,                     
But we'll be gone.
Political, Social & Spiritual Chameleons.
~
Listen for the sirens
I'm on a highway
Along the perpendicular streets

Having escaped my killer
There's blood on the windshield
There's blood on my thoughts

The rush of song
I've experienced it all
Yet this is only track four

The night wind slices through
A fracture in me
Two sides of me
Must push on and away from here

Is there something happening
Inside that causes it all to melt?
To stick to the sidewalk?

To form into a river of transfiguration?

~
I overflow, I absorb,
I push, I retreat — and then
I pour it out.
I gave myself names,
So, I took on forms,
Types, meanings,
Traits I had never worn before —
Unlikely mutations.
The end was
The Beginning of Everything.

II
I materialized,
Threading time and space onto myself.
I exploded,
Giving birth and dying —
In multiverses.

III
I budded through fractals,
Creating illogical gravities.
Where there was supposed to be no life —
Angular feelings emerged,
Flattened stars,
Ellipsoidal planets...

Until Human Beings appeared.

IV
Then everything changed.
They began to put me in boxes
Shouting with anger:
“My Faith!”
“Your Philosophy!”

And yet I am everything:
Existence in non-existence,
A colorful flash,
Undulating silence,
A sigh that screams.

V
Drink me,
Eat me piece by piece,
Discover me — but don't defend yourself
Against denial,
Consequences
And mistakes
When you see a wall in front of you.

VI
Don't take yourself away —
Because YOU ARE
Also, in that
In which you sink

Your Gaze

Your Hearing

Your Thoughts.
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