I wish he would love me as I love him.
I wish someone would wrap me in their arms.
I wish I could relate to couple "goals".
I wish there was someone to tell me I'm beautiful
even though
I'm freaking out and look like a mess.
I wish someone would dance with me.
I wish I could love someone, even though it means
losing them.

tired of the way everything's the same

tired of walking down the same **** roads

tired of keeping feelings in, strangling them for you

tired of everyone thinking I'm nothing more than a
straight A student just because I'm Asian

tired of being judged by girls in the locker room

tired of giving lots of love that I'll never get back

tired of loved ones leaving

tired of losing people because I did something stupid

tired of hearing love songs

tired of seeing couples and thinking of what we were

tired of feeling confused

tired of feeling scared

tired of not feeling enough

tired of being sad

tired of hating myself

tired of living sometimes

but one thing I could never get tired of...

you.

You cared too much about me
I guess that's why it hurt when you stopped
I never really needed constant reassurance,
But you told me I was beautiful anyway

I guess you don't know what you have until it's gone
right?
Because without you, I feel really cheated on my feelings
I don't know where to go
Because you were the place I went to
When I was alone
When I was breaking
You were my safe haven

I still have your number on my phone
Like a suicidal hotline to call when I'm feeling down
Like a counselor to talk to at school when anxiety kicks in
But yet I never call
Because you're too busy now
And I don't want to step on your life

Yes, it hurts you're gone away
It hurts that I'm a selfish person and forgot you have a life
It hurts that I forgot that a lot of people look to you the same way in the same time
But at one point, you only had time for me
Now our time, is their time
I still feel cheated

But you aren't 911
You aren't promised to always show up when I need help
You aren't my guardian angel
It's not your responsibility to watch over me
It just hurts that you did anyway

You cared too much about me
You loved me too much, even though you never said it
You showed it
And it still hurts
But am I brokenhearted?

I don't know.
You were never mine.

can you tell me when you get tired of me?
can you tell me, instead of just leaving it out there?
leaving what's oblivious to me become obvious in public,
making me look stupid for trying to love you
so that people won't look at me through the lense you fixated on me

can you tell me when I'm overreacting?
can you tell me, instead of just leaving me out there?
leaving me to be judged by the people who don't know me,
making myself look stupid for making small things look big
so that people don't look at me with the impression that I'm just another teenage girl

can you tell me when you don't love me anymore?
can you tell me, instead of just leaving me?
leaving with no warning, leaving me to break down,
making me look stupid for giving you a chance
so that my heart would hurt less than it already does.