Stuck in my head with this sickle hanging low
Within the forest of music
Nestled empty under a cradle of nature
Empty chest choked with the guilt
Quivering lips forget the words
Left incomplete as you go
The tranquil grove is no more
As the stars rain down like tears often do
The light shining above me is nothing special
This razor extinguishes the pain
The swirling blue embers reminding me of you
But you are not here by me
And now I swim in the creek
The current is pulling me into the abyss
I see no reason to comply
And the sanctified caress of the grass is warming
All I ever knew was you, and now I don't know myself
I don't want to go
What choice is there in this grief
Surrounded by the maggots and butterfly
Shrouded in your vibration
Your shoulders are so strong
I wish this was all I had to be
The anger is so primal and unforgiving
You are coming to terms and resenting me
Why should I try at the cemetery
Crawling around I'm wasted in the undertow
What was it you had to say
I just want to feel normal
Now it's too late
I'll hang onto those murmured words
Even though in this twilight I am to blame

society the suicide disease
aware of proliferation
following the reaper
abused substance
synthetic chemicals

trailing behind god
melodic tone perceptions
tears high
value low
long will it hurt
loved ones go
drapery over eyes
shadow plays

youth is growing old
give something to behave
only here is now

find the dead
hanging around the head
lidless crossed eye
it's okay
reaching so high
falling so deep
precious human soul

you walk ever closer
taste the doubt
dying on your blade
subject to be aware
visage of pain

Power.
Restricted from operating.
Stuck with stagnated blood.
These bounds are limited.

Help.
Slumbering upon sheets.
Filled with ruin and decay.
Distractions drifting astray.

Dreams.
Spiraling down.
The past is to stay.
Old faces go away.

Yet we remain.
Broken in time.
Not afraid.
Enslaved.

Sorry, Mom and Dad.
Sorry, I'm introverted.
Sorry, I'm sad.
Sorry, I'm a layabout.
Sorry, I'm bad.
Sorry, I don't want children.
Sorry, I leech off of you.
Sorry, I'm a slob.
Sorry, I didn't go to college.
Sorry, I cannot hold a job.
Sorry, I have no direction.
Sorry, I take you for granted.
Sorry, I fight with you.
Sorry, I'm ungrateful.
Sorry, I disrespect you.
Sorry, I shed these tears.
Sorry, I know someday i'll miss you.
Sorry, I love you.

I am alone in this struggle.
It is because of intuition I am here.
Perhaps the future is so dim I cannot see.
Saddened by this lack of motion, I float gently.
Belonging nowhere, yet wanting to go home.

My own reflection is the testament of grief.
The mindset isn't whole, though it streams parallel to this situation.
The sickness stems from regret.
Why do I continue through the madness,
jaded and engulfed by desperation?

I wish it were as easy.
Just to sit in this room.
No one able to trick me.
Not a single false thought.

I don't want to exist.
Every fiber of my essence would just simply disappear.
Not a single person would frown, all of the injustices would still be.
Though, tomorrow would act like nothing happened.
Even continue without.

I wish to be dead, long ago.
Before growing up, and getting old.
The only time I feel worthy, is when i'm asleep.
And, the questions are riddled with contradiction.

It really is a shame.
Seeking through life for something genuine.
We all put up a front, acting like it's what we want.
Tricking others into thinking we are legitimate.
In the end, we're just using devilish-wit.

To go through the motions, is to be jaded.
Feeling like "death", but also wearing a disguise.
A colorful universe hidden behind frightful eyes.
Why is it so difficult to just find a reason?
Is there purpose in all of this abstract?

It's like gambling.
We get a taste of it once in our life.
Viciously, we want it again.
That one connection.
To another sad soul.

Sheltered under a tree of naivety.
Family failing to exist.
Each eye gazing above.
Dwarfed by clouds of misfortune.

Little flower holding on tight.
Doesn't seem to surrender without a fight.
Trickling leaves brush away.
Thunderous roar, bark decays.

Swarling winds with cyclones around.
Dancing words twist profound.
White fades to black.
Situation echos something nil.
Ending with a concussive shock.

Hands retrieve a golden watch.
Time sits still, unwilling to move.
Though, it's over; it's nothing new.

Argument interrupts tranquility.
Child left speechless, wondering "why?"
Shadows doom them all.
Together they cry.

I love many, many don't know.
I sit by the creek, sometimes all alone.
Reading thoughts of the passers by.
Shooting warmth between their eyes.

Tricked into war, tricked into politics.
This whole scheme; a consequence.
Betrayed, broken and bruised.
A jealousy that has never been used.

Figure of speech, destined to be acquitted.
Unraveling cords, unlikely to be submitted.
The simple trick of tying a knot.
A lesson soon, likely forgot.

Unity in numbers, mostly not me.
Divided we are, united standing tall.
Reaching for the stars, afraid to fall.
Courage is a aftermath, afterall.

Like a yo-yo bouncing around.
The dreams in my sleep are renowned.
Only tossing and turning can churn them out.
The mundane day is what life is all about.

Forget and forgive.
Ride the little creek.
Don't be afraid, you silly meek.
Explore destiny and be a freak.
Live life rich as a sheik.

Tap into darkness.
Become its champion.
Sanction the power.
Defy reality.
Posture proud.

Smoke the vapor.
Breathe with confidence.
Flex your fingers.
Grow callouses.
Become a man.

Tie loose ends.
Ignite romantics.
Paint pictures of girls.
Trip over love.
Weep tears of jealousy.

Put in hours.
Enjoy a hobby.
Kindred a spirit.
Love unconsciously.
Seek purpose.

Right all wrongs.
Study the anti-hero.
Learn existentialism.
Ignore God.
Enlightenment is key.

Rest well.
Burdens come and go.
Sanctuary is what you make it.
Knotted fingers unravel.
Time is cruel; lovely.
Grow proud.
Awaken.

Entering forgotten sacred grove.
Before all; make sacrifice.
Waterskin filled with tears.
Empty gift into stream.
Become one; adjacent of Mother.
Kiss a leaf; covert fiber to ash.
Watch soot animate into air.

Luckily, favour is bestowed.
Invigorated, gaining great perception.
Seeing each foot step illuminate.
Prints of fiend and foe.
Auras of silver; some of gold.
Pulsing, accompanying each beating heart.
Lurk further, if not weak of mind.

Footing becomes treacherous.
Heels; weakened of frailty.
Parka too heavy.
Shedding skin, turning hope.
Colors looming; fading in, some out.
Fatiguing, yet desperate.

Swimming up, deprived oxygen.
Vines trip, knotted at ankles.
Trailing honey, scented guide.
Climbing higher, vision enduring infection.
Picking, chewing, freeing the whole apparatus.
Light reflects from above.

Tainted, the hand sinks down.
Grasping, something of power.
Sensations overflow.
Reality checks within.
Preciously ending.
White hands, angelically caress.
Bleeding no more.

Mending all wounds.
Awakening the fire.
Around pit, peers cheering.
Rite of passage endured.
One with nature, little child.
Flesh, bone, soot, ash, fiber.
Boy evolves to man.
Wonderous joy.

Your eyes open.
Moon looming over like a foreboding omen.
Laying under the stars; embraced by pavement.
Red bricks punctuate the discomfort; consciously.
Raising the right hand, clenching a furious fist.
Blood trickling down; a sanguine kiss.
Saluting the sky, you cursed the wish.

Your heart starts to beat.
Picking up, only to move into a dark room.
Some injuries are elusive; chronic.
As the room engulfs, you bleed a little more.
Suddenly, senses sway.

A deep down trait becomes ignited.
Your affinity for justice rekindled.
The engine inside now beats with a grim courage.
Grinning through the anguish with prudence.  
Shadows in the room become evicted.
Reborn; you stand tall embracing the darkness.

With this new found power you march.
Defending all those who cannot for themselves.
You dig deep, you fight hard.
Entrenching the fragility of man.
In this pain, you are enigmatic.
A shield to humanity; the conqueror of misfortune.

Greatness comes with malice.
Withdrawing, the power fades.
Vigilante, you trekked too hard.
Even the defenders need rest.
So; draw upon our strength.
We all cannot enter that dark room.
You are the protector of our herd.
We migrate together.

Don't give away your gift.
Be brave, be kind.
Allow us to be a pillar.
A fixture upon your mind.
Shake the stigma plaguing the people.
Create legend that will enlighten us all.
Thank you; he who has the wolf heart.
You may close those heavy eyes.