Who am I?
I don’t know anymore.
It’s hard to live a life,
Where are your fond memories feel like you’re watching someone else’s life.
I’m this empty shell that just goes through the motions of life,
I laugh,
I joke, and I plaster on my perfected smile,
I cry,
But after all of that is through,
At the end of every day….

I just feel so empty

Void of everything I thought I was.
There are few people who make me feel *real
Close friends,
Lovers,
Ex-friends and lovers,
Sometimes those real feelings are even enjoyable.

But they never last.
When all comes to a close at the end of the day,
I lay in bed,
Staring into the darkness,
Feeling nothing.

Am I even human?

How is it possible,
That I can be a stranger to myself?

Isn’t time supposed to flow in a linear direction?
Isn’t that why they’re called ”Timelines”?
You’re born,
You’re a baby,
A kid,
A teen,
An adult,
Old,
Dead,

Last century,
Decade,
Year,
Month,
Week,
Yesterday,
An hour ago,
A minute ago,
Tomorrow,
Next week,
Next month,
Next year,
Next decade,
Next century,
Next lifetime

Isn’t that it?
That’s how it goes?

Well then, what’s wrong with me?

I know I’m getting older,
But I can’t see today.
What is now,
When I keep looking back?
I’m taken back to my past every day.
To the good,
To the bad…

Yesterday, it was October 13th, 2014.
Last week, it was January 8th, 2015, and 2000.
Today, it’s October 14th, 2015….
Wait…
What’s wrong with the calendar?
It says it’s January 20th, 2016…
Where am I?
When am I?
Where did the time go….?

How do you do it?
How does one take an abstract painting,
And interpret it as words, sentences, stories?
How do you give a color an emotion?
What language does a line speak?
It's so hard to personify something that was created,
To remain a mystery?
So hard,
Yet so naturally human
Why can't I do it
Like you?
When it comes to this phenomenon of abstract expression,
I put the b in *dyslexic

I'm so broken inside, and you act like that's okay.

You think I'm out of my mind?
Well, you're right.
But remember this, my dear reader.
I'm all the way out here,
Because it's much scarier *inside

Anything is poetry if you just hit "enter" a bunch of times.
Sentences and paragraphs become lines and stanzas.
And when you're done, look at your masterpiece.
It's a "Free Verse Poem".