I long....
I long for all the things you said
I never promised you anything, never made plans
But you did.

You filled my head up
With those artificial pieces of memory never made
With all those erratic and untouchable fantasies
The ones I still see in my head, you know
The ones that are still part of what I want, of what I am
The same ones you seem to share not so subtly with another
When I always thought they were ours
Not perfect, not right now, not the most important by far
Not even real, but ours
Yours and mine
Together

As if that means anything to you

I'm crazy for your eyes  
Those multicoloured spies
The way they search reality
The way they used to look at me

You cannot feed these hungry mirrors
Without the boldness of the fearless
I cannot find them looking for me
I search the air, the illusion, the debris

So I shall stay and you shall float
Away from me, away from us both
Find a treasure, if you  haven't already
I'll be here ripped apart but steady

You're reason, barely heart you show
I'm both of them, both consume me
Both distort things I should know

Your nature's light but not inconstant
That's my belief,my hope
Two lonesome stupid plays of my mind
That cannot follow their quiet oath

Time's relentless, it leads you somewhere else
There is not much that I can really do or say
The heart's wounded, mind's so very tired
But my hands can at least invite you to stay

I always saw it coming
Can't say that I'm surprised
You're just like everybody
And I believed your lies

Truth be told I wish
I had the strength to do it
Rip you away from inside
Forget you, mean it and prove it

Life's been harsh in this town
It's a struggle in every front I lead
Selfishness is all around
Your picture makes it harder to breathe

You don't care, you don't know
And all I know is I'll be cured someday
A time will come when all my being
Won't care enough to ask you to stay

I heard you all those times and believed
I saw us in my longing for that "one day"
Millions of times and tears fell out of place
Always for you,

Just not today

Why can't you be horrible and full of unforgivable flaws?
Why does it gets worse and not better inside my stupid, devoted heart?
Why do you still feel the same to me?
Your skin hasn't lost that scent I knew
The scent I still know and can remember by simply closing my eyes
The scent I still desire and find familiar
Even if it really never was