Fluffs of conversation
float through the car,
as you slowly
inch your way
towards
my face.
                               Turning away,
                               I realize that's all this was.
                               Merely an attempt
                               of desperation.
      
     Yet again, my apologetic smile
     Denies this boy annually
     just as I did two years prior.

                                                                        I'm sorry.

This isn't right,
and we're both wrong.
In complete innocence
I simply continued with my day,
whether you will believe that or not.

Never entering your sight
I tried to solve this before too long.
I did my absolute best.
but you tore me apart in a whole new way,
because we have never fought.

Instead of being mature about this,
you lie. And turn people against me.
I am being attacked.
And ridiculed, behind my back.

You're constantly hurting peoples feelings,
especially his.
Sorry if you can't accept that he's finally starting to see.
Lie all you want.
I know I didn't do anything wrong.


               Whatever you need to do,
               figure it out. Because you are still my friend
                                                it's true.

Isn't this supposed to be fun?
I was under the assumption that
your friends were supposed to be people
you enjoy being around.

             You're mean, and rude.
             Condescension is your specialty,
             and I hate it.

Memories of laughter, and secrets
flood my visual mind. Smiles creep up
on me, reminding me of those times.

             It's not the same anymore.
             You don't need me, now that
             they all like you, too.

                       I was merely a stepping stone
                       in the race to the top of this
                       friendship pyramid.

What is that, anyways?
A friendship pyramid.

       Whatever it may be, you win.
       Okay? You win. Everyone likes you
        best. And you know what? I don't care.

I just want my friend back.

Gabbing about my day and talking
about life has never been our thing,
has it?

Forced conversations is the essence
of our relationship. Being in your presence
makes the hairs on my arms stand up.
My neck tenses, only thinking
about it.

I thought these things came fully equipped,
instinctual bonds. But all you do
when you are near, is disrupt.
You are a rotten human being,
so I'm done causing a fit.

I have accepted that we will never
get along.   And no, this isn't one of those
teenager things.

         It has been like this as long
         as I can remember.
    
                     You lost me as a daughter,
                      and as a friend,
                      long ago.